AnnMarie_C

DH and I are getting ready to leave our ailing cat for 4 nights and I am suffering from a serious case of guilt, stress and anxiety. Our beloved 16+ year old cat is in renal failure and while there's nothing we can do for her other than weekly fluid injections I feel terrible leaving her. Last year, we cancelled a two week trip to Italy because the vet, as did we, felt the stress of us being gone that long could harm her. DH and I have left her separately but not together. We've asked the pet sitter to stop by twice a day instead of once. Has anyone else had to deal with this or a similar situation? Any words of wisdom or advice??

starrsville

Only you can decide whether or not to take the trip, BUT if you decide to go I strongly suggest you leave her at the vets and not at home with 2 stop by visits a day.

She's 16. She was ill last year. She is about to be left in an empty house.

I would definitely board her at the vet - especially considering her medical history and needs. If she experiences a set-back, she'll be there for immediate attention. If the worst happens, I can't imagine my guilt if she died while she was alone at home.

My post is not intended to be judgmental in any way. I've had to deal with a similar situation and I'm just sharing what would work best for me.

tcreath

I understand your concerns as I, too, am a cat person with three of my own. I agree with the above; I would either leave her the vet or perhaps with a friend or relative who would be with her often. I don't think I would leave her in an empty house by herself for that long, given her condition.

Good luck!
Tracy

sandypaws3

AnneMarie,
I can definitely empathize with you. We have old animals... one is in pretty good health, but the other is always at the vet. If I were to leave, and one of my animals were ill, I would leave them with the vet. We were in Nashville once when one of our dogs became ill, and my daughter-in-law was worried, so she called us. I told her to take the dog to the vet, and we kept in constant contact with the vet. We asked if it would be better for us to come home. She said no, that what our dog needed was nursing care and to be on an IV. By the time we returned, he was much improved. I felt good about leaving our dog with the vet, as he'd been going there for 15 years and was comfortable with the staff.

Sandy

Pat2003

AnnMarie, I feel your pain and I agree, leave her with a vet or better have someone move to your home for those few days so the cat sitter can stay with your sick cat 24 hours a day. Your cat needs not only attention but also a comfort of having someone with her all the time. Twice a day is just not enough for beloved 16 year old. Our cat is 19 so I can only imagine how you feel. Your cat needs special care and love too. Good luck and hope you will be able to work something out.
Pat

Amanda23

My heart really reaches out to you! I have two cats and can totally understand the anxiety involved in leaving them. Thankfully they've never been ill, but that would make it excruciating to leave them. I agree with the last two posters, board her at the vet or have a friend come stay at your home where at least you know she'll be well cared for.

I can see from your post the concern and love you have for her - this kitty has had the privilege of having owners who truly love her and prioritize her well being. Many animals never experience that, so try not to be too hard on yourself about leaving for a few nights, even if she's ill. She has had a long, good life and wants you to be happy too. Just take a few precautions so she's cared for, and take your trip.

TheWeasel

Have you considered having someone house-sit instead of just a petsitter? I think there are 3 options: utilize the twice daily petsitter, board her at the vet, or have someone stay at your home. I'd think having someone stay at your house would be less stressful for the cat than boarding her at the vet or someone else's house. A change in location is probably more stressful than being alone IMO. At least at home she can sleep and relax in familiar surroundings.

Barring a housesitter, can you ask some friends/neighbors to come over and spend a little extra time keeping her company?

Scarlett

Hi AnnMarie,
My little cat was diabetic and it was difficult to leave him alone for long, those last couple of years..he was 18 when he died.
We had a great pet sitter who came a few times a day and brushed him and fed him and spent time with him.
His last years, I made sure there was a house/pet sitter, in the house, sleeping there and watching him more closely.
It made us feel better and at least I knew someone was there if he took a turn for the worse.
It is so difficult, I do know how you feel..

GoTravel

I can totally relate. I've lost two to renal failure and one I had to have put to sleep right after a trip and the guilt just about ate me alive.

Is there another cat in the house? I've always had two cats and an outstanding cat sitter so I didn't feel bad leaving her and the second time him at home.

If you leave her at the vets office, they can hook her up to a sub Q fluids IV and she'll be a big fat full cat when you pick her up.

The only way I would not take her would be if the stress from the vets would make her worse.

Remember, even tho she is your baby, she is still an animal and deals with pain and uncomfortable situations much much differently than we do.

Four nights really isn't that long. Unless she is truly on her last legs, and you would know, go and don't worry.

P_M

AnnMarie, I'm so sorry you are being faced with this decision again. I went down this road about 3 1/2 years ago with my sick dog. I did take the trip, but only because DH would be home with her. About 2 weeks after my return we had to put her down.

I like the idea of leaving her with the vet. 4 days it not a very long time and I think it's a chance worth taking. And if the worst should come to pass, at least she'll be in a place where she is being looked after and they can make her comfortable.

Please let us know what you decide, and many hugs to you.

BTilke

Oh this is such a tough call. But if you do go, agree with everyone else, leave the cat with the vet. Your cat could need immediate attention at some point and the hours between the pet sitter's visits could be critical. 16+ is getting up there for a cat, but some of them are tough and can hang in longer than you'd think. My parents' last two cats both lived to just under 20.

ethel

In November of 2004 our cat was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyapthy, which is enlarging of the heart wall. When we took him for his check up 6 months later it had progressed to congestive heart failure. He was put on pills that we had to give him twice a day and we had to make him an indoor cat to keep the stress down. He was only 4 yrs old.

At that time, we had made plans to go away for a week in May to Hilton Head and Myrtle Beach. We had considered canceling our trip but decided to go. We were renting from my aunt at the time, and she always fed Hector when we were gone. We had thought about boarding him but decided that would be even more stress and with his heart condition we had to keep that a minimum. We asked my aunt if she would be willing to give him pills twice a day and she agreed.

Of course, I felt really guilty leaving him and was petrified every time we went away that we wouldn't come back to him. Alas, we decided we still needed to live our lives. I know he was pissed at us some times because he would use the plant as his bathroom when he was.

I guess my point is, as hard as it may be, you really have to use your best judgement. Hector died in September and had I known that the disease would take him so quickly I probably would have done some things differently. For example, we went away the weekend before he died. Of course, I look back at that now and hope that he forgives us. I know he knows we did all we could and gave him the best care we were capable of. He was put on this earth for us and we were put here for him and to help him enjoy his short life.

Sorry if I've gotten off track. I miss him so much. A major piece of my heart is missing.

Anyway, 4 nights really isn't that long. If it were longer I would consider otherwise but I think you should go and just make sure that your kitty has the best care possible.

AnnMarie_C

Wow, thank you everyone for your input, I sincerely appreciate it.

Starrsville, you're cool--I appreciate what you wrote.

GoT, she is our one and only. After instruction from the vet, we've been giving her sub-qs at home and they have had a positive effect on her even dropping her creatin level from 6.9 to 6.2.

I spoke with the vet and he said removing her from the home would be too stressful so I will pursue the other options. On one hand I really want to stay home with her for the duration but we have no way of knowing how long that will be so on the other hand I'm not sure how realistic it is never to leave her again. The vet said they've had cats live up to 3 years on sub-q fluids and we shouldn't put our lives on hold. Lots to think about.

AnnMarie_C

ethel, you posted while I was still typing. You wrote, "I know he was pissed at us some times because he would use the plant as his bathroom when he was." lol, they have a way of letting us know what they think don't they? I am very attached to our cat so I feel for you when you say a major part of your heart is missing.

starrsville

Mine just huddled in the darkest corner of the walk-in closet for the last few weeks of their lives (happened to 2 cats a year apart).

I added an additional litter box closer to the new chosen nest - just in case she had trouble (or didn't want to make the effort) going downstairs.

Follow your vet's advice. She's used to the sitter. Live your life. You are doing everything (and more) that you can. Sometimes, nature just takes over.

dlnappy

AnnMarie - Have you looked at Petsitters.com? I am a petsitter that has been affiliated with this group. Often, you can find a pet sitter that is a vet tech or who has first aide exp. that will stay at your house. Make sure that they are bonded & insured. I left my 15 year old cat last summer to go away for a few days knowing he had a major illness. It's heart wrenching to do so. Turned out to be terminal cancer. I hope the website may help you.

dsquared

Ann Marie, your vet may be able to point you in the direction of someone who can assist. As dlnappy points out, some pet sitters have vet tech training (mine does - gives me great peace of mind when I'm out of town). I found her through my vet.

Litespeed_Chick

My sainted Doberman started getting skinny one December and went into renal failure just before Christmas. He had never had a problem previously and was only 10. The vet said he would die, but "admitted" him anyway and put him on an IV around the clock. We had non-refundables to visit my husband's parents, his once-a-year trip to see them. We were afraid he would die while we were gone, looking back, I'm surprised we went.

On our return, the vet said he was amazed, but the dog was better and could go home. He also said he didn't know when, but "this is what will kill him".

So the moral of that part of the story is you never know, you can't stay home forever.

A couple of years later, the Dobie got sick again and went downhill FAST. So fast over one weekend we knew he was dying and chose not to torture him by dragging him to the vet for his final moments. I spent the whole day sitting with him out in the yard, but I went inside late in the afternoon to watch the finish of the Tour de France. When I came outside 30 min later, he was dead.

Moral of that part of the story: no matter how hard you try, there's going to be pain and guilt.

I wish you the best.

SAB

My elderly cat lived for 2 1/2 additional years on twice weekly fluids. Whenever I left town one of my vet's techs was my petsitter, she came in twice daily and the cat was fine. I knew that she would spot any changes in him and would get him to the vet. He never seemed to stress about me being gone, he did however have his brother for company.

GoTravel

AnnMarie, my heart truly breaks for you because I do know exactly what you are going through.

My Fred The Cat was my heart and I lost him the week of Christmas a year ago.

That said, he lived 2 1/2 years after diagnosed. One of the big things that I think helped (besideds the Sub Q fluids) was I would squeeze all the liquid out of a can of tuna for him and he would lap that up. Then I would reload the tuna with water and squeeze it again and he would drink the tuna juice.

What I did find out through MDs and NC State Vetinary hospital that proteins are NOT bad for a cat in renal failure and let kitty eat all the proteins he/she wants.

Also, that awful KD Formula Cat food was the worst. It blew poor FTC's insides out so I stopped that. Constant diarreah wasn't the ticket.

Anyway, good luck!