Mole people in tunnels in NYC

Old Apr 20th, 2000, 11:25 AM
  #21  
Andrea
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You know, I was just browsing the internet the other day when I read about B.D. Eise, this world-famous mole-lecular biologist, who lives and works out of the underground tunnels. Turns out Dr. Eise is quite the expert on the physiology of Mole People. Maybe you could visit his lab for a real Mole experience--I hear he's quite testy, so you might have to mole-ify him before a visit could be arranged. Perhaps by providing a nice meal of char-grilled Prime NY Rat?
 
Old Apr 21st, 2000, 12:39 PM
  #22  
xxxxx
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To the top.
 
Old Apr 21st, 2000, 01:54 PM
  #23  
Helen
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If you can't find a tour, just stay home and catch the closest facsimile from your desktop:
http://www.si.edu/organiza/museums/z...rat1/nmcam.htm

 
Old Apr 21st, 2000, 03:33 PM
  #24  
Armund Ali
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Dear Friend,

Indeed there are people living in the tunnels below New York City. I was brought up below the 34th Street area by my single mother. Many of us (Afro Americans) lived anywhere from 6 to 10 stories below the surface. We were proud living below the city, making it on our own. There was almost a tribal system of laws and customs in the caverns. Much of the crime that existed up top did not take place in the caverns. The chief, at the time his name was Umar Ugandi, dealt strictly with any criminal acts (using the eye for an eye rule).

My most horrible memories were of the floods. The rain washing in from up top would cause enormous flooding to the unsecure areas of the caverns. Many babies and pets were washed away and lost in these floods. They are very hard to think about.

I remember the day my mother was sent to serve the tribal chieftans and sent me on my way. I remember how my eyes burned on the vey first day I saw the sky. I remember the first day I met people of different color, how amazing it was.

Maybe one day I will return to the caverns, the hustle of the tribe, the culture of the people below. I urge you to explore the undercity. It is an amazing and wondrous place.

Best Regards,
Armund
 
Old Apr 21st, 2000, 08:10 PM
  #25  
MolesRUs
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We'd be remiss if we overlooked the patron saint of the Mole People: Moliere
 
Old Apr 22nd, 2000, 08:57 PM
  #26  
Badjoke
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And the Mole People will have their very own United States senator after the next election: Rudolph Moliani.
 
Old Apr 23rd, 2000, 08:00 AM
  #27  
Dan
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Ah yes, the mole people. I had the good fortune to live with the Mole People for 12 years. i can assure you, Ann, that there is nothing to fear from these gentle evolutionary misfits. the average mole person is only about 3 to 4 feet tall, with short legs and long, strong forearms. Their diet consists of the mold grown in huge colonies, along with rats and the occasional alligator. They have a thriving culture, based on Grublug, the god of darkness. Also, having participated in the Dance of the Mole Children, i can attest that it is not as easy as it looks.
 
Old Apr 23rd, 2000, 08:16 AM
  #28  
Al Godon
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I wish you folks would quit acting as if Mole People were figments of someone's imagination. I used to be a Mole Person no kidding. No, I was not cast from any special mold -- it was enforced because of financial reaons. Years ago in Washington D. C. (not NYC) there was a cheap housing area inhabited by young people who were just starting jobs, were students, or were people who had no job at all. The area is located near Dupont Circle in DC. I don't recall the name of it unless it was Hardnette Hall.
But my room was below street level. I had a window that opened into a semi circular dugout area lined with bricks that enabled me to peer up at pedestrians' feet and car tires.
At least it was cheap and gave me a place to sleep until I got a raise and could move to better quarters.
It was while living there that I learned that Mennens Spray Deodorant was very effective at killing roaches. The first time I used it was an act of last resort to defend myself from the aggressive attack roaches that had evolved there.
(They had big molars so I did not want to get close enough to hit them with a shoe.) Fortunately, the spray was effective and became a standby. I had two cans; one for me and one for them. But occasionally a two can defense was necessary.
Because the wiring was substandard, blown fuses were common which caused prolonged blackouts.
At least the sanitary facilities worked, usually. And there was a shower.
 
Old Apr 23rd, 2000, 06:28 PM
  #29  
judy
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Dang! You people are scary...
 
Old Apr 24th, 2000, 10:39 AM
  #30  
Mole Cule
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I can't read this posting at work; I laughed so hard I cried and my tears fell into my keyboard...and I got fired.
This is one of the funniest postings ever...
 
Old Apr 24th, 2000, 02:42 PM
  #31  
Cindy
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I can tell you for a fact that the Mole people are real because I adopted two Mole children. (They prefer the term Sub-Level Underground Group, or "SLUG"). It has been a rewarding experience, but difficult at times. There have been all of the nosy questions ("Why do you keep the children in the basement?" and "Where did you find 240 sunblock?"). It is hard for me to answer these questions while my children are around, so I usually just brush them off and change the subject. But when my two beautiful Moles wrap their frail stubby arms partly around my neck and rub their slippery little cheeks against mine, I know I did the right thing.

The adjustment has been trying, but it helps that my husband and I went down among the Moles for several weeks as part of the selection process. We had to explain why we wanted a subterranian adoption, and we had to pledge that the children would never work for the circus or appear in any cheap movies. At first they were suspicious of us, but we convinced them that we were truly sympathetic to their plight. (By the way, I actually liked the food down there. The grubb was really quite good.)

We have our worries, of course. There are so many things that cause them trouble. They are both deathly afraid of heights, of course. And the teasing at school has been merciless. Taunts of "Fishbelly, fishbelly, I know what you ate last night" just reduces them to tears. Children can be so cruel, you know. In dodge ball, the other kids aim right for their heads because they know my kids can't see the ball coming, unless it is pitch black outside, of course. And don't get me started about tetherball.

Well, anyway, wish us luck, and thanks for listening.
 
Old Apr 24th, 2000, 09:32 PM
  #32  
nancy
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Of course, they ride in "auto-mole-biles", wear "moleskin" boots, play "mole in one", and usually die of "mole-aria". Anyone from NYC knows to ignore them.
 
Old Apr 25th, 2000, 10:56 AM
  #33  
Jean
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With apologies to the "I was drunk" thread on the European forum --What is the appropriate dress for visiting the mole community? Will I look out of place in a pink running suit or white tennis shoes? I don't want to be labeled as an American tourist? Also, do the mole people take U.S. currency? If not, do you know the exchange rate? Do they have ATMs? Can you recommend some restaurants that the locals prefer? We want to avoid the tourist traps.
 
Old Apr 25th, 2000, 11:00 AM
  #34  
martha python
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The currency is the sa-mole-ian.
Don't even mention traps, tourist or otherwise, around the mole people.
 
Old Apr 25th, 2000, 11:23 AM
  #35  
Cindy
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Jean,

Crunchy pink running suits are just fine, even preferred. The better to see you in, my dear. Whatever you do, DON'T wear black. There's not much light, and the Moles won't be able to see you coming. One doesn't want to blend in too much. One morsel of good news, however. Moles LOVE washcloths! Big, soft, cushy, fresh-smelling ones. When you arrive, you are issued a fresh washcloth for each day you'll be visiting. They even use them as napkins!
You'd better bring your own pillowcases, though.
 
Old Apr 25th, 2000, 12:40 PM
  #36  
ronnie
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When is the rainy season in Mole land? We are considering some excursions. If it rains, will we be reimbursed or get a rain check? Is it better to wait and buy the excursions when we get there? Are the lines long? Will I be pegged as a tourist if I wear shorts? Do I need to get any shots first? Is there a web site with an advisory for mole land? Do I need a passport? Should I take my own water? Do I need to bring my own toilet paper? Will I be allowed to bring my 75 pound golden retriever?
 
Old Apr 25th, 2000, 03:41 PM
  #37  
Helen
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One thing's for sure - above ground or below, EVERYBODY loves Haggis-in-a-Tube(TM)!
 
Old Apr 26th, 2000, 05:04 AM
  #38  
dan woodlief
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How about mole in a tube? Wouldn't that be what people from the UK would call one of these subway dwellers anyway?

What do you call this situation? Moles running rampant in underground New York? I say it is a real "molestation."
 
Old Apr 26th, 2000, 12:28 PM
  #39  
cricket
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You people are making a mountain out of a mole-hill.
 
Old Apr 26th, 2000, 10:21 PM
  #40  
Paul
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Only a few people on here seem to have taken the original question seriously...
Would someone please give us evidence as to the truthfullness of this?
By the way, do you think any of the mole people (if there are any) have a webcam? Thanks.
 

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