So sorry to hear that, Patrick. I went thru something similar with my mother when she was ill in the spring, so I feel for you. As much as you love your parents, it can be difficult to become an overnight nurse, especially under such daunting circumstances with an approaching hurricane.

Me and the Scarlett's gecko will join you for that drink.

Oh Patrick! I'm so sorry.

Is there any way you guys can just go pick up mom and head elsewhere? Atlanta?

If you aren't on the immediate coast (storm surge) I think you are just as safe staying in your home as trying to guess where the storm will not go.

It is such a crapshoot trying to figure this out.

Patrick: where is your mother's place?

This is one of my fears....I'm my mother's nearest relative, and I'm 750 mi. away.

Sorry, Mom's place is in Naples, about 10 miles from me. Ironically their very well built three story building pretty high and dry would have been a better place for me to flee to. Instead my place sits with ground floor at about 5 or 7 feet above mean high tide, right across the street from the bay in Naples -- not a great place to be. We have numerous friends who have offered us more inland shelter, but now with Mom who has been going through a period of major dementia and helplessness, it's more than a bit awkward. If the storm is really coming here, then we will need to get out. We will survive!

Patrick,

Can you stay with her at her place, or is it too close to the water? Can you take her to a shelter if and when the storm hits and stay with her there? Is public transportation an option? I'm sure flying would be difficult for her, but what about taking a train (where???)? Only you know your mom and what will be least stressful for her. You know we all wish we could help.

What happens to the other "independent" residents who don't have family in town? Are they just left there to fend for themselves?

I'll bet there are hundreds, if not thousands of people in similar predicaments right now. What do you do??? This is so awful.

Patrick that is too awful for you. I hope things work out. I know how helpless you feel! Please take care of you and your Mum and have more than ONE drink! Tandoori Girl, my gosh you live on a mountain;-)...... I keep singing: nowhere to run to baby, nowhere to hide(Martha & the Vandellas (I think).

Patrick, this is ungodly! They are forcing these elderly people out? It seems they should take them all to Orlando and bring nursing staff with them!!! Is that legal? Surely her contract doesn't allow them this recourse. I think you should call the Naples newspaper and have them look into it. Or the TV station. What if someone did not have a loved one to go stay with? Would they then be left to fend for themselves? This is unconscionable.

Judy, I'm in S. Tampa, off Lois/Morrison. Where are you?

No, you don't understand. This place has "independent" living and "assisted living". Mom is on "independent" which means that she does not require nursing staff or aid in personal matters. Normally that would be fine. But due to a recent medical problem she has been too disoriented to manage fully on her own. The place is taking the independent people to a hotel, but they are to manage their personal matters on their own, just as at home. The assisted living occupants will have nursing staff accompany them.
For the past week, I've been running back and forth making sure Mom is getting dressed, giving her meds to her, and generally supervising her. But I can't go to Orlando and stay with her in the hotel they're taking them to, and so I need to bring her home with me.
I don't fault the home at all for this. The real problem though is that I'm sure many of the independent tenants are going to be equally disoriented with all this confusion. They will have some staff there, but they can't offer them full assistance and they aren't contracted to do so.

Yikes, Patrick. Is it time to take a short trip to FLL? Although it's not the best of scenarios...

Gosh Patrick, your mom was already having a difficult time so I know this must be very stressful for both of you. Again, she's lucky to have a son who cares so much. Just one word of advice--wait until you get her up the stairs BEFORE you have that drink! (Sorry, sometimes a little levity is a relief.)

ooops, jain;ea, guuud idear, but yourr two laate withh that suggezstuhun.

Patrick, maybe you can share Mom's meds -- heeheeheehee.

Oh my gosh--what a visual!!!

HA--as I sit here figuring out how to ration my Zanax!

If you pay the facility for "assisted care," could they then take care of your mother at the hotel? With what mothers do for us, nothing is too much to do for them, I think. She might feel calmer and safer being with her friends from the center.

If it's like my mom's place, once you get into that higher cost bracket, there is very little chance of ever getting back into the lower cost one. And the difference in cost is appreciable.

Patrick, what about a condo rental? Can you hire a private nurse inland and take mom?

I feel so bad for you. The stress of this storm is bad enough and your situation is compounded.

It will turn out okay Patrick. If I could send you valium by email, I certainly would!

Tandoori Girl, I am in Cape Coral now. We are moving to Fort Lauderdale in October. Either side gets hit, we are out luck... Ivan is an equal opportunity destroyer...go figure.

We're all set. I've been to the store to stock up on foods. I stopped at our theatre scene shop and improvised a "gate" to block my stairwell so she can't fall down it at night (she is also virtually blind). And our good friends with whom we rode out Charley have invited us over there if we need to evacuate Olde Naples-- two extra bedrooms on the ground floor, extra bath and high ground a bit inland. Some of you may well remember about their six dogs however that go wild when the power goes on and off and the doorbell rings. Sounds like a fun weekend to me. Heading back to the liquor store soon. Mr. Dewar's will get me through it nicely, thank you.

Yes, this assisted living thing is major. First of all for them to take over her meds, we have to throw everything out and have all new prescriptions filled and delivered directly to them (too late for that to happen before tomorrow). They won't be responsible for meds given to them by patient or family (can't really blame them there). And TG is right. Once you go on assisted living it is almost impossible to go back off, as a new evaluation is required and they'll always say that the patient needs that continued extra care. Thanks for all the concerns, we'll be just fine. And my positive kharma is telling me this storm is headed for disorganization and an end to life out in the Gulf.

I'll second that positive kharma for Ivan dismemberment in the gulf.