Well said, Melissa!

Agree with Melissa. If the dude is so particular, he should have stayed at the Holiday Inn instead of their house.

TXTravelPro, big sigh. Was the bottle clear to see or did you have to rifle through his toiletries to find it? I ask because it makes a difference on how you might want to proceed.

A few questions...What kind of relationship do you have with your son?

Is the medication to treat depression?

I would hope no one would judge you -- it's an awful situation to be in. We're here to lend you an ear.

Hey jetset1..
I like the tent and the air pistol idea and of course the Cognac!
Always love to hear from you Girlie!

Whatever happened to the Scout's code: to leave the campsite in better condition than you found it?

When I am a guest, unless I am specifically told <i>not</i> to, I make my bed every day, leave the bathroom neat and tidy, and do not leave my possessions or clothing strewn about. When I leave I strip the beds and leave the linen folded at the foot of the bed.

And I thought everyone in the civilized world knew that, and did that.

The best thing to do to prevent these situations is to fill the guest bedroom with gym equipment. A bowflex simply doesn't make into a guest bed. Add a treadmill
and a stationary bike for good measure.
Just for fun, set up the homes' only desktop computer in the room as well.

Certainly continue to entertain, just not overnight.

R5

I think the guest was way out of line to tell his hostess what she may or may not do in her own house.

That said, I think it is kind of strange to feel the need to change sheets and towels, add flowers, and clean a bathroom when someone was staying for only a few days. Sorry Pat2003 but that was more than a little Stepford-ish imo.

Your houseguest was rude. He shouldn't have said what he said, or could have been moe tactful. He could have politely asked that you didn't need to bother making such a fuss over him and or something to that effect. I can understand where he is coming from though--it probably felt like an intrusion having someone touch your personal items. He just could have been nicer in his approach.

Thank you for your fascinating responses. I really appreciate every each of your opinions. I am not worry about it too much, it is just not worthy to focus on such small things. To answer some of your questions, yes he actually yelled at me not just complaining to my husband. My husband was taking a shower at the time.

Suze, I change my own towels every 2-3 days. Don't you change yours that often? I just assumed everyone does it and I do this is for my guests at the same time. Never had this kind of reaction.
It is interesting to read that having a guest to stay for a week and sleep without changing sheets is OK but while staying in hotels so many of us demand that sheets should be changed every day.
BTW, he apologized this afternoon and in front of my husband.

I am very glad he apologized to you - especially in front of your husband. He has some class after all.

Don't be concerned about any comments on how often others change sheets, towels, etc. As others have pointed out, it is YOUR house, you do what you like in YOUR house and if guests don't like it, they don't have to accept your hospitality.

I forgot to add that I enjoyed reading so many of your interesting ideas (toothpaste in his socks, grease up the bottom of his shoes w/oil) and so many of you made me laugh. Thanks for your sense of humor.

Coward, yelling at you while your husband was in the shower. Pfst to him!

Thanks for coming back Pat2003. It's nice that he apologized but what did he say? &quot;I'd been off my drugs too long&quot;? Sorry. There is no excuse for that rudeness.

I'm impressed with the number of responses you've had in less than 24 hrs. You are right up there with the big time threads (he needs to know that). You go girl! :)

Another small sign hung on wall by door.. This room may be monitored for quality control purposes.
New Visa Ad.. earplugs- .99
coffee - 6.99 lb.
donuts -8.00 dz.
*teargas for ungrateful houseguest* ...ask your server
*Empty guestroom? ......PRICELESS!!!!

While I think you have every right to go into &quot;his room&quot; at any time you please, after all it is &quot;your house&quot; not his. But, I do think I can see where some may feel uncomfortable if you were to go in and clean up a bit. My mom did this one time, my cousins were staying with her for about 10 days, she went in their room one day and took his tennis shoes and threw them in the washer. I was mortified! He was a little upset that she washed his shoes without asking, but she really thought she was helping out. I didn't see it that way, nor did he. I understand this is slightly different as you were cleaning property belonging to you, unless you did his laundry or something. I think you are sincere in not wanting this to ruin a friendship, but I would talk to your DH, get his opinion. Perhaps next house guest, you can say &quot;hey, do you mind if I just freshen up the room a bit while you are gone?&quot; Seems silly to have to ask since it is in your own home, but even though you KNOW you are in the right, I always try to MAKE people feel as though they may be. Does that make sense? For example, I would ask them if it was ok (when I am thinking...it don't matter what you say, it IS ok), but I still smile and wait for the answer.

Piping in late, as usual. I respect the privacy of my guests and do not enter their rooms without their permission when they visit. I expect to be accorded the same courtesy when I stay in the home of others.

I change the sheets of guests before they arrive and after, ditto for fresh towels. I do NOT wash my towels every two to three days, but once a week is sufficient. Ditto for sheets.

I am glad the guest apologized, as he shouldn't have yelled. I do understand why he felt he needed to communicate that he wanted his privacy and he should have done it in a more appropriate way. Perhaps you both learned something.

This is like some sort of Emily Post thread. ((H))

Oops. That was supposed to be a clapping, happy sort of face, not a cool shade face. Well, maybe I'm just so cool. Don't need the sunglasses in Seattle, though.

&lt;Suze, I change my own towels every 2-3 days. Don't you change yours that often?&gt;

Actually no I don't... since when I use a bath towel I figure I'm basically pretty clean!
:-)

If he stayed in a hotel (and next time suggest he do that) their staff would be in his room changing linens and towels sometimes twice during the day. That is a stranger, not his host.

Another late arrival.

It's wonderful that he has apologized to you (as well as in front of hubby) but I do hope he does the nice houseguest thing and brings or sends you a nice bouquet of flowers!!

Just a guess but I don't imagine you've been married very long (&lt;5 years) cause you really don't need to be THAT nice to houseguests.

Hopefully you both learned from this. Of course his is a major sin whereas yours is but a minor one!

Someday you'll really laugh about this.

Towels..hand towels are changed every day in my home. Aren't I strange. They are changed for houseguest too! Bed linens are changed weekly.

Again, fresh bedlinens and towels, fresh flowers etc..Pat you are a hostess that seems to want to make your houseguest visit beautiful. I guess because I have had houseguests stay with me for a month or two at a time neither the houseguest or I have ever had a problem.

And if one has a housecleaner who goes into the guest's room or bathrooms and cleans up..is this a problem? Not in my home. If my always welcomed houseguest is not happy with that I am more than happy to give them a list of hotels in the area.