seetheworld

I know it sounds crazy, right?!?

Well, this is happening to me and I don't know what to do.

My DH has booked a weeks stay at the RC at Amelia Island, Florida and I don't want to go. I'd rather stay close to home, perhaps head out to Long Island or into NYC for a couple of nights. We seem to be at odds on what to do.

So, I'm asking...

Has anyone else ever felt this way and if so, what did you do about it?

holly

It doesn't happen to me, but it does to my husband. We take one trip together each year and then he's done. I love to travel, so I take my mom or one or both of my children for any other trips planned in the same year. That way my husband gets to stay close to home working on various projects, and I get to visit new places with other people that I love. It works for us....maybe it could work for you.

dcespedes

Well if you're crazy then I'm crazy, too...but wait.... I knew that about myself ;-) No, I don't think you're crazy and we have cancelled vacations before--something just didn't feel right about leaving at the time and so we changed plans and were okay about it. Several years ago we had plans to ski in Austria but we cancelled--we found out from friends who went anyway that it rained the entire time. I feel it's good to be flexible!

OneWanderingJew

No, I've never not wanted to go on vacation but there have been times where I didn't want to go out of town for something--ie a wedding or some other obligatory visit.

Maybe it's because I"m the planner and I get excited in the details??

It doesn't sound like you don't want a vacation, you don't want that one....

LoveItaly

Hello seetheworld, it is strange to see your post as I have been awake during the night as I am not feeling well. So of course checked out Fodors.

I am feeling exactly as you are, except I don't even want to go anywhere for even a couple of days. Right now I just want to stay home (no doubt due to the fact that I have some strange flu/virus).

But there have been other times in my life when I just didn't want to travel as I had other things on my mind; projects, problems to take care of or maybe just plain old "I want to be home thank you".

And I do love to travel as I know you do. But I look at not wanting to travel as the same as sometimes we just don't want a fantastic gourment dinner for whatever reason.

Best wishes to you. And no, it does not sound crazy.

karens

I know a couple that disagrees all the time on where to go on their vacation. They told one time they agreed to put two choices in a hat and whatever was drawn was where they went.

I don't want to go on vacation in December, except for a day trip to NYC before Christmas. I know Christmas week is a busy travel week, but I have zero desire to get away then. My kids are still young and Christmas is a big deal around here - we have many dessert parties, and family over on Christmas Day, so that keeps my mind off traveling. As soon as Jan. 1 rolls around though....

mikesmom

I'm going through that right now!! I ALWAYS want to travel and people are always asking me where we're going next. Well, I have $450 worth of Southwest Airlines travel vouchers that are going to expire on October 15th and I just don't want to use them. Many of the places we can travel to using these vouchers are still quite warm in October (Phoenix, for example) and I don't want to do it. We are having a terribly hot and humid summer in Detroit and I can't wait for it to cool off. Why would I want to go back to summer in October? Anyway, I would rather just get in the car and drive four hours to Northern Michigan and stay there for a few days. I asked my husband if he thought it made any sense to use the vouchers and spend $2,000 on hotels, meals, etc. or just not use them and save the money. We have decided to go "Up North" and not worry about using the vouchers.

My friends can't believe I don't want to travel. I guess it happens to the best of us

ccolor

Well mikesmom, pass those vouchers along to us! I'm always ready to travel and am in the midst of making plans to go a couple places this fall - Southwest Airlines could easily fill the bill!

GoTravel

Yes, it happens to me with every single trip.

I chalk it up to separation anxiety.

As soon as I get on the road/to the airport, it passes.

Meesthare

It happens to me with every single trip too. I'm all excited about going, and then a day or two before departure I think "Wouldn't it be wonderful if I didn't have to do this?" But that does seem to evaporate on the day of travel.
When my kids were little I never wanted to leave them. They didn't have a problem with it - I did. It got easier as they got older.

xxxx

I feel just like GoTravel.

I like to go. I want to go. I love the planning. Right before it's time to leave, I don't want to go. Once I'm at the airport, it's fine.

Good term--"separation anxiety."

OO

When the kids were young I hated leaving them. ("What if something happens to both of us"). Now the kids are grown and gone but we've got an 18 year old cat and I hate leaving her! Reading what you all have written though, I wonder if these aren't just my excuses and I have some generalized anxiety about leaving. Like you all, I'm fine once I'm at the airport, it's just bad the few days leading up to departure and we always still go and have a wonderful time.

The past two Christmases we've gone to Paris and had a fabulous time, but I'm with you Karens...when the kids were at home, home was the place to be at Christmas!

Hope you feel better LoveItaly! Summer is no time to be down with the flu.

OO

Along these same lines...does anyone else clean the house like crazy just before a trip? And heaven help my family if they messed up my handiwork just before we left!! Now our grown daughter does the same thing. LOL

LoveItaly

Hi OO, thanks for your kind thoughts. And yes, I not pleased to be feeling so sick, in fact am suppose to be in SF on Saturday and at the moment don't feel up to taking the garbage out.

Strange coincidence, I have been awake and feeling miserable since about 3:00am PDT and would you believe I have had three phone calls from Italy between the time I woke up and now (which is 6:30am here). What is with that LOL.

Cleaning the house before I leave on vacation. Absolutely!!!! Doesn't everyone??? OO, it is something I have always done, crazy I guess. But when I return home I want to arrive to a neat and organized house. Take care, and do know that you have company regarding that clean house.

ccolor

OO - there's nothing better than coming home to a clean house and only laundry to do to be totally caught up - get the house spiffy and head to the airport to stay the night before is usually my plan of attack.

GBelle

Mikesmom,
I don't know how to do this, but could you donate your vouchers to something like "Make a Wish Foundation" so they can be used?

JJ5

It's only happened two times in my life. I do not have that anxiety and love the days "just before" looking forward to an adventure.

The first time was leaving my 4 year old for a European trip with my parents in my mid-30's and to see/visit my relatives in Germany for the first time. It was anguish leaving him for 14 days.

The other I remember very well, as I was pressured into going and did NOT want to go to that destination nor in that timeframe. It was over Easter.

Found out 3 or 4 years later why that trip happened, and let's just say that if I hadn't been "happily" married 20 plus years and been involved in school myself, high school kid's hockey etc. etc.- I would have seen the bigger picture and realized it was the first red flag of a major, major mid life crisis in my spouse.

Now overall, I would not ever travel over holidays that are traditional or important to my family members. That definitely includes Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter above all others. My entire extended family comes to me, and it wasn't always my choice, but now I wouldn't change it for a free trip to Hawaii.

LoveItaly

ccolor, going to the airport the night before and staying at a hotel is something I have often done and is a great start to a vacation IMHO.

seetheworld

Good morning

Well, you have hit many "nails on the head", lol. It just doesn't feel right leaving home at the moment. The odd thing is that ususally my husband and I are in sync about these types of things -- so now I'm thinking the problem lies with me.

I do have many things on my mind (this has not been a typical summer for me) and I am suffering from a severe case of separation anxiety.

Boy, when I read those words, "separation anxiety", I let out a BIG sigh. For me, it's no longer about leaving my kids behind (well, the 19 year old still concerns me, lol), but about being left behind by my kids.

LoveItaly, I was surprised to see your post too! I hope you are able to get some rest and are feeling better soon.

Leona

I felt that way for some time before we took a cruise last month, but it turned out to be a terrific vacation.

Maybe you're worried about the weather, it's been such a bad hurricane season. Perhaps you should reschedule.