Hi everyone, is it just me, or is it always women who do the travel planning? Seems that we're the ones glued to our guidebooks on the plane & the ones who miss out on delicious views . . .

My hubby just seems to let me set the itinerary (so I'm pleased) but anyone else wish that their partners would take a bit of interest/make an effort to help out ?
Just wondering . . . !

It's definitely that way in my family, too. If it were up to my husband, we would mostly stay home, maybe one trip a year to the Jersey or Maryland shore (from PA, so not far!). So I set the itineraries and make all the plans. Sometimes I do wish he would at least be interested enough to have an opinion, but on the other hand, he's quite good-natured about coming along and seems to enjoy wherever we go. And of course, we go where I want!

Hi,

No, it is not only women who do the planning.

Well, I'd agree that, of the friends I know well, it's more often the women who plan any holidays and hence, more often the women who have their noses in guide books and related websites.

That said, this may relate to the fact that, amongst my friends the women are the partners within each relationship who are a) most interested in travelling and b) least laid back to point of being horizontal...

I wouldn't go as far as saying "always" though ... I do know a few men who are the travel planners in their relationships!

PS I'm going to Daunt bookstore in a few minutes to buy two more guide books to bury my nose in!!!!

Ditto KarenW. It sounds exactly like my family!! Maybe it has something with women need to be more organized or that we are dreamers...

And what's up with the thing that guys hate asking for directions - *no way* would hubby ask in a foreign language! Again, it's "you do it honey"!

I've always been the only travel planner in our household. Mrs. Fly used to complain about it--overplanning, not spontaneous, etc. Her idea of overplanning was me making advance reservations for accomodations, taking days to find the best and least costly mode of transportation, researching things to see and places to go.

This past spring, she finally convinced me that, on our August trip to the Adirondacks, I wouldn't do a lot of planning. That we'd just let the trip take its course. I figured that it wasn't that big a trip for us, so what the heck.

Well, let's just say that the trip did not turn out to be the most fruitful, enjoyable, or cost-effective that we ever had. Now she is even taking part in planning for our trip to Costa Rica in January.

My wife takes an interest in the planning but since I'm best at details she wants me to do the detail planning. She doesn't want to get into the guidebooks etc until we are on the plane. She loves travel and she can't wait for our trip to France next Spring but doesn't not love doing the details.

I, too, am the in house tour guide making all arrangements.

That's why you don't see my wife responding.....she doesn't even come into Fodors.

Whether I'm traveling with a girl friend or a male friend - I do it. Usually because I'm the one who wants to visit someplace, so do the legwork as if I were going alone. Then I figure with whom I'd like to do the trip and it's "out for bid" - whomever gets back to me, they're "it" - my travel partner.

I have folders of various "I'd like to" trips, and when the time is right, that's the one I go with.

After our '01 trip to Southern Africa I wanted my next trip to be closer/shorter (flightwise) and wanted to visit Morocco. However, with the world situation, nobody seemed to want to go to a Muslim country - shame on them. So out came my S.E.Asia folder and a girl friend chimed in she wanted to go. So I got current prices and off we went for 16 days to Cambodia and Thailand - again a very long flying trip, that really "kicked my butt", more the heat & humidity.

Regardless whether with a gal or guy I always ask their input and while the guys usually don't care, the girls do and their interests are definitely included. On a trip to Australia I actually left a "free" day for leisure to catch our breath while up at the Barrier Reef, and my guy said "what do you mean, we have nothing planned today?" Well, we (or should I say, he) booked something or other for the day and off we went.

Guess I've just been lucky as the guys feel I plan, arrange and price out a good itinerary and have never heard a complaint other than "we should have stayed longer"; while the gals comment "it's so nice to have a "wife" to take care of everything" - it get's a laugh and I've yet to hear any complaints from either camp.

But I'd still like a trip where nothing is planned other than the flight and rental car (and great maps) and where it takes us, and where we stay, and what we do is a surprise every day. My only requirements - accommodations with a/c, clean linens, plenty of towels and hot water, and, of course, a good bar with Abolute Vodka and/or cold, cold beer. Now that will really be exciting for me.

My husband buys--and reads--the guidebooks. He also arranges flights and car rental. I check out the websites for houses and hotels, we compare notes, and I make the arrangements. I also research the Michelin and Gault-Millau websites for restaurants that might be worth trying.

Apart from flights and trains and knowing that this week we will be in this town or village and these are the places that might be nice to visit (weather and mood permitting), we don't really do intineraries. We know that if we miss a place this time, we can always go back.

So I guess we split up the planning, though the overall direction comes from my husband . We'll often go to a particular area because he has read about it in a guidebook or the history interests him.

I am definitely the travel planner. I have made the arrangements for every trip we've taken as a couple in four years. I think it's because I enjoy it more, and I have more experience at it so I know the best resources online. Hubby does take an interest and will even read the travel books I buy, but he knows I really love doing it so he just lets me do it.

I have had to learn not to overplan, and we have found that we have the best time when we have a couple of things in mind to see and do and then let things take their course.

My husband packs his bags when the trip approaches and gets on the plane. That's it. (He has enjoyed every vacation, but if I waited for him to plan it, we'd still be sitting at home watching Golf Channel.) It would be nice not to have to attend to every detail. I must say, though, that he's very good about not blaming me if something doesn't work out just right.

I reckon it's the household control freak that does the organising. In our case, that's me

Surferboy hates doing the details and I enjoy it, so I plan and discuss it with him, and he has veto power. We first bounce around ideas and come to a mutual consensus (Italy next summer) as to where to go.

He does have an interest in foreign languages, so is willing to join me in taking extension college courses in Italian this year. He always immerses himself in the language(s) of the places we'll visit -- that's how he prepares himself for the trip. The downside is, once we get there and someone starts speaking to him, he turns to me to respond! Hopefully the extension courses will fix that!

My husband and I choose a place we would like to go, and then I do all the planning. After months of planning and a nice printed itinerary, nothing ever goes as planned. This is when I get disappointed about a trip that I had been longing for months.

I love the process of travel planning, and my husband hates it, so it works perfectly for us that I do it. We like the same things, and he's a great sport. I tend to get upset if my plans don't work out, and he always tells me I'm too hard on myself.

I do everything, plan the vacation,search the internet, buy the tickets, make the hotel reservations and suggest where we would like to go. My DH does not care and he is happy to pack only his suitcase when D_Day come, I do all the worry. Also, because I am trilingual, I am the one that asks for directions when we go abroad.

I'm with hanl. The Type A in the family does all the planning. That's me.

Sometimes when we get there and DH starts to get behind the wheel of the car I've rented, I have to laugh. Since he doesn't even know where we're going, how's he going to drive there?

He has a great navigator.