So CAN two people fit into an Air France lavatory??

What are your recommendations for this trip? And why am I in a handbasket?

This baby seal walks into a club...

(groan)

To answer Marge's question "what kind of shoes should I wear to post?"

If you are a horse, wear horseshoes.

If you are a human, wear the shiny black riding boots that all the jockeys wear.

It is now post time.

I have to fly from Rome to Chicago.
Only direct connection available is with A.A. but I'm so afraid, once on board, stewardess can arbitrary introduce herself and ask me about how my day has been.
Should I put a tuxedo on in order to let her know I am not american ?

Calamari: yes...wear your socks with Teva's instead...

...

No, No, Canard, with her IQ, she may think you are a penguin and will have the SPCA waiting for you.

Only if Canard waddles when he's going down the aisle...

Try the Groucho Marx walk and you should be fine. "Walk this way..."

Heat wave in Europe! American men resort to Speedos in effort to cool off!

"We like the natural air conditioning," confided one man interviewed on the beach in Paris.

I have to stay at the very best hill town (not second best, please) in Provence.

If an American goes to Europe wearing cut-off jean shorts and sneakers, looks for a McDonalds for every meal, tries to use greenbacks rather than the local "monopoly money" and spends every moment taking pictures of the funny old buildings, but nobody is around to see him (her) - is he still an ugly American?

Yes

I've been fantasizing about meeting Rick Steves on Rue Cler.

Me.

Where, oh where, is Elvira?

Alright, people....I've got a cheesy disposable camera and I'm not afraid to use it. Say Cheeky Monkey!

I need directions to Bedlam. I need company to go with me to Bedlam. I need the best price, in real money, please get me to Bedlam.

I need...oh heck!....this IS Bedlam!

dln.....you're gonna laugh at this:

There is a small village near where I live in the UK, that is actually named Bedlam. As you go into the village, there is a sign - no kidding - that says "BEDLAM.....please drive carefully."

Makes me grin every time I see it.

That's up there with the sign in Fort Meyers Beach that names the road as "Lovers Lane."

Underneath it is a traffic sign saying "dead end."

Ouch!

Rita, I've had the same fantasy....ha!

Bugswife1, I agree, where IS Elvira? Miss her talented posts.

Ciglechanta, BirmhamRocks :
thanks , but I decided , then, not to hide my nationality.
So, I've just started up watching The Sopranos in order to look a real italian.