We will be in Munich for the final weekend of Oktoberfest this year. I realize I'm beating a dead horse by asking this, but after reading past posts I'm still confused about "protocol" and thought I'd ask you fine folks for help.

Here are the details:
-We don't have tickets or table reservations at any of the tents. We're looking to have a good time and experience the fest in full effect, oompa band, rowding singing, etc...

-There are only 2 of us.

-We plan to go to the grounds early on Saturday morning.

-We already have our place booked and are within walking distance of the grounds.

-We don't have traditional clothing to wear.

Here are the questions:
-What tent should we *try* to get into, without tickets or reservations? Are our chances better since there are only 2 of us? Are our chances better at any particular tent?

-I'm thinking about bringing little "trinkets" (beer coozies, magnets, CDs, etc...) from home (we live in Nashville) to give to friendly folks who might be open to sharing their table with us- is that cheesy and dumb or a good idea and a nice way to meet people?

-What is the absolute latest time we could arrive and still have a chance of getting into a tent on a Saturday?

-What is the general consensus about "foreigners" sporting dirndls and leiderhosen? Is it the equivalant of coming to Nashville and wearing cowboy boots and sundresses on women and Wranglers and Stetsons on men- totally cliche? I could see how it would be fun to dress up and how it would add to the experience, but I can also see how it just screams, "Hey! Check me out! I'm a tourist!"

Any advice you can offer will be appreciated!

I have been to Octoberfest several times and always have moved around freely from tent to tent - now that does not mean I sat down but could stand and drink beer, radishes, pretzels, hazlenuts, etc as I wanted. I found moving from tent to tent does indeed give a great overall view as each tent though similar is different, not only in decor but type of band and music - I heard the Notre Dame fight song in one tent and pop music oompah band style in others and more traditional Beer Barrel Polka fare always in each.

Note the special puke stations in the restrooms - prepare to see and deal with a whole lot of way too drunken folk.

>Is it the equivalant of coming to Nashville and wearing cowboy boots and sundresses on women and Wranglers and Stetsons on men- totally cliche?

Yes, but most non locals do it, even people that work here. Extremely cheap imported clothes. Sometimes you can't resist giggling, unless it's your boss from work. (That was a fun day LOL). Oktoberfest is tourists only or at least 80%-90% tourists. If you just behave like them and wear a cheap whatever, you'll fit in. Locals will go to the Wiesn only when invited by the company or with the kids.

-Early sunday arriving before noon is a good option.
-I experienced a fist fight in front of my place between at least 5 people two years ago. Don't go back to your hotel too late in the evening.
-Don't pee at houses, basement windows, mailboxes etc. Don't shout at night.
-Oktoberfest is a nightmare for all the people living in the area (like me). Try not to make it even harder for us.

-And don't drink and drive. You'll be arrested. At night, checkpoints are not only around the Wiesn, but also at the ring roads that connect to the Autobahn.

I'm trying hard to think of a way to misbehave.
Sorry, there is none

The "traditional Dirndl or Lederhosn" are as foreign and non-authentic for people from Munich as for New Yorkers or people from Bali. Aside from those few living in rural Upper Bavaria, "trachten" gear is a costume for anyone.
But no one will care one bit.

You can get the full "look" (incl. shoes, shirt/blouse, stockings) for appr. €200 in the cheapo Oktoberfest stores around the main station. The real things are really, really pricey. Just a good pair of pants can easily cost €500 or more.

Bringing trinkets will be too much and indeed a bit odd (not that that would raise an eyebrow). If you want to show your appreciation for someone you befriended, offer to pay the next beer. (Don't do that too often.. beer is ridiculously expensive on the Oktoberfest grounds).

Usually there is not much "etiquette" to obey when you want to sit down. When you spot an empty space, GO for it.
It's not the time or situation to show how polite you can be (unless they look seriously stronger than you).
It's like Black Friday sales when you have 1K people running for 10 sets of 50" flatscreen TVs for $100. It's them or you.

Have.. hum.. fun ;-)