fiona

Has anyone gone out of their way to help someone with their queries only to get no acknowledgement for your help? I have hopefully answered quite a few queries and most people are appreciative but , on occasion, I have heard no more- sometimes you just want to know that they have solved their problem. Recently, I researched the web for someone and found their answer and I have heard nothing back( and I wasn't the only one).It's like holding open a door for someone only for them to sail through without a word, or letting a car out into a stream of traffic and getting no acknowledgement!!!Mind you, you continue to do it because most people are polite!!!

Earnest

You're so right, Fiona. Glad you mentioned it. <BR> <BR>Cheers, <BR> <BR>Earnest

ellie

Yes Fiona, it is disheartening when yout efforts go unrecognized, but I hope this wont cause you to stop contributing - even though the original poster may not express gratitude, the information you supply may very much help folks just "passing through" and will add to the body of information contained here for future searchers. <BR>

claire

You're right- we should express gratitude. I know I have asked questions on this forum, only to be called a troll. It's disheartening that there are so many obnoxious people who read this board. I have gotten a LOT of great advice from reading other people's questions and answers. Sometimes I don't express my gratitude in writing because I don't want to scroll the forum! <BR> <BR>Your analogies were excellent though- I would never NOT say thank you to a stranger who held the door open for me. I will definitely start showing my appreciation more, and I thank you for bringing this to my attention!

elvira

I view my contributions to this forum as casting bread upon the waters. <BR> <BR>I never think about getting thanks for any help I give, but it's nice to know when someone found it useful. <BR> <BR>Assume it's helpful, assume people use it, assume people appreciate it and your psyche will stay healthy.

Ess

Fiona, there was a thread here on this very topic several months ago. Some people were of the opinion that the thank you/acknowledgement is implicit in the query, while others felt that a separate acknowledgment should be posted. Others solve the problem by posting a thank you in advance, which is what I do. Some posters' questions get buried and they don't even realize that there has been a response. I agree with you, though, on your point that it is nice to get a follow up post on how the situation worked out - like reading trip reports. Makes the board more interesting in my opinion.

Fiona

thanks to all who replied!!!! I agree Ellie that your info can help others just passing through- I've found Elviras replies very informative!!! <BR>To Ess- I often say thanks in advance as well.I haven't used this forum for that long but always find it very interesting and people are very willing to help. I even posted a query about Hong Kong in this forum as I knew people would help , the Asia forum isn't so good for that!!!

Bob Brown

I think that whenever we post here, we do so in hopes that our information or opinions will help the person asking the question. But we don't always know if the questioner thought the reply was useful or not. <BR> <BR>I get the feeling from time to time that I give too much information; that what I write is way too long. <BR>Often, the questioner may have no basis to judge a good answer and, in reality, all he or she wants is a a quick response. <BR> <BR>Take for example the question we see a lot: "Where should I go on in Europe?" How can such a question be answered in 10 words or less? I usually leave those alone because giving a complete answer probably would be far too detailed. <BR>The best answer might be something like this: "Visit Paris and London." <BR> <BR>A question I often get personally, is "Which Swiss pass should I buy?" Given the bewildering array of Swiss passes, the question is almost impossible to answer with confidence. I even had one question that said, in summary, <BR>"Pick a Swiss pass for me." <BR> <BR>If I have really helped someone, many times I get a very nice response. <BR>I don't expect gratitude, but I do think the polite thing to do is to express appreciation. Unfortunately appreciation of the old school way of thinking seems to be in short supply on this forum. Moreover, we seem to be losing ground in the civility war. Way too often, because Fodors does not monitor the content, we get vulgar and/or obscene postings. Take for example the thread that started out on a topic that was in bad taste to bein with: The way people smell. At the end, when I read it last night, the comments had deteriorated from bad to worse. There were some very ugly, even obscene, remarks. I had tried earlier to lighten the thread up a little, but failed totally. <BR> <BR>In conclusion, I don't expect it, but a polite "thank you" is nice. On the other hand, not hearing anything is a risk of the posting game.

Diane

Often new posters don't realise how busy the forum is, and that a question they asked last night may be way down the line by the time they sign on the next evening. So they either repost the same question, or give up. Like elvira, I figure if it gets read, fine. If not, so be it. I have had some great exchanges with folks via email based on either a qestion or an answer posted here.

wes fowler

Fiona, <BR>I do appreciate thanks or at least acknowledgement of any suggestions or recommendations I may make but I don't expect it. If I have extensive and detailed comments to offer, I rarely do it here, but either Email directly to the questioner or ask that he or she Email me directly. In those cases where I am directly corresponding with questioners, I invariably followup upon their return from their travels to get their impressions of any recommendations I've made. Those followups usually prompt a thank you or two. <BR> <BR>

Enough

It's a forum, not a Miss Manners competition. The purpose is to answer questions in order to help others out in the present and for those who do searches. If someone responds to a reply, great. If not, then most likely the information was still very helpful to them or others down the road.

My Story

Seems to work best when askee thanks in advance -- then posts a brief thanks after quite a few responses have been made. Have seen posts where there was a thanks after almost every response (unnecessary). <BR> <BR>I don't feel bad if I don't get thanked. This is a forum, not personal correspondence. However, if I typed a long e-mail outside of the forum, I think that would deserve a personal thanks. <BR>

Lori

It's always nice to get a thank you, I too have often wondered what hotel "bewildered" stayed in after receiving recommendations, or what side trip "can't decide" finally took, or did "scared to drive" finally rent a car or take the train. A post after the trip would be nice when it appears the poster is planning their trip based on suggestions from this forum. Helping people is nice but there is nothing wrong in an acknowledgement of suggestions if they have been acted upon. Maybe I'm old fashioned too, but I thank people for their help.

Art

We all like to be appreciated, that is human nature. As mentioned above, this is an information exchange forum and it does not always happen. However, one of the advantages of using my real email is that sometimes I get a personal email thanking me for my responses. I too would like to see when someone returns, if my information was helpful. This encourages me to respond with said information when I see another similar question, or conversely, if things have changed and the info was not useful, then I know not to give that specific info to anyone else. As Bob stated common courtesy is in short supply at times, not only here but also in general. Part of our deteriorating civilization I guess. <BR>To enough - No this is not a miss Manners school but it would be nice if a few more people had them. <BR>Regards <BR>Art <BR>

Diane

Hey! Right-on Art!

Gerry

Often times I will see posts asking for help. They may get 10 or more replys involving considerably more effort than the person who posed the question. Some may ask questions for additioanal information so they can help further. The poster doesn't reply and the post eventually vanishes off the board. Where did this person go? Did he/she see the answers and just not want to be bothered to answer? Did he /she just post the question and leave and not see anything. Maybe they think this forum is like Ask Jeeves and they're just getting some computer generated response? It just makes me wonder why did I and everyone else bother to waste our time. <BR>Knowing that many others may be reading the post, I always try to answer the question with that in mind, providing general information that might be helpful to others. Often other people will jump on the thread and ask more questions. So, yes, it can be helpful people other than the original poster. <BR> <BR>Also: Because I often use my real e-mail address, I have recieved a number of e-mail requests for eg. information on a specific hotel etc. After writing some long and detailed replys, I have usually asked them to tell me what they decided or write me what they thought when they got home. About 1 out of 3 never even acknowleges they recieved my e-mail let alone thank me. And I have never yet recieved an e-mail when they got home. <BR>I must confess that because of this I no longer get a warm and fuzzy feeling when someone e-mails me a plea for help, and my answers have gotten a bit more terse. I guess it's just my human nature that I like to be thanked for my efforts. <BR>Is it really so wrong to ask for a little common coutesy? <BR> <BR>Gerry <BR>

petpet

Having.... problems.... controlling ... my contempt ... for this ... post.....Why does this person need to be appreciated in a virtual world? Perhaps she is not appreciated enough in the real world. Get over it. Any response is gratuitous and should be given knowing that, and without strings or expectations in return. If you crave that added attention and appreciation, get a dog. Anyway, a "thank you" post without substance does the disservice of topping a thread that may have run its course.

fiona

to Pet pet <BR>contempt for a post? Get real!!!!!It is because of postings like yours that I do not give out my address.But perhaps you got the reply that you really craved for when you posted your reply???? <BR>to everyone else: <BR>aren't there just too many people like the above in this forum? Still it's something we have to put up with as essentially this IS a worthwhile forum-even it is has become more difficult to navigate through recently!!!

Selfish

petpet: <BR>And what might be your motivation for posting on this board? Perhaps a free outlet for your anger? <BR>Cheaper that psycotherapy I guess. <BR>Of couse if you have travel info I could get for free please write back with your real e-mail address so I can take advantage of your uncontrollable need to give.

bowser

petpet go back to your doghouse and shut up. bad dog. fiona ignore thios trash and realize that although manners would be nice many people have few to none. remember that the information posted is of interest to many and we still can cull information useful to us for the future. keep trying