Italian Etiquette? do's and dont's
Jul 9th, 2008, 10:58 AM
#21
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Zeppole, that's funny! At some of the more earthy, eco-friendly grocery stores in our town, you're expected to bag your own groceries for good Karma, but it's not typical here! LOL
Where are you from originally?
Where are you from originally?
Jul 9th, 2008, 11:08 AM
#22
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If you want to be popular with Italian shopkeepers, give them the exact amount, right down to the last centissimo.
I remember being in a queue for a ferry where everyone was giving large notes and the poor clerk was beginning to have steam coming out of his ears.
When it came to my turn, I had the exact money and he threw up his hands and shouted, "Brava! Signora!"
I remember being in a queue for a ferry where everyone was giving large notes and the poor clerk was beginning to have steam coming out of his ears.
When it came to my turn, I had the exact money and he threw up his hands and shouted, "Brava! Signora!"
Jul 9th, 2008, 11:12 AM
#23
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All of which said, Italians aren't French.
They don't expect you to know their etiquette, and don't get all hoity-toity if you don't.
Most major places you're likely to want to go and see have an array of icons at the entrance: a typical heavily-visited church will display its dress code, a prohibition on flash photography and, bizarrest, a ban on dogs (what WOULD St Francis have said about that?). Italian do expect you to honour those rules: but they're perfectly tolerant if you don't honour unexplained rulesv elsewhere others: our local supermarket the other week had an organised system to cope with tourists who forgot to weigh fruit and veg first, for example.
Behave courteously, keep your eyes and ears open, and if a request of yours puzzles people consider that it might not be considered <i> normale </i>. No-one's trying (much) to rip you off, they all want you to have a good time, and just relax.
They don't expect you to know their etiquette, and don't get all hoity-toity if you don't.
Most major places you're likely to want to go and see have an array of icons at the entrance: a typical heavily-visited church will display its dress code, a prohibition on flash photography and, bizarrest, a ban on dogs (what WOULD St Francis have said about that?). Italian do expect you to honour those rules: but they're perfectly tolerant if you don't honour unexplained rulesv elsewhere others: our local supermarket the other week had an organised system to cope with tourists who forgot to weigh fruit and veg first, for example.
Behave courteously, keep your eyes and ears open, and if a request of yours puzzles people consider that it might not be considered <i> normale </i>. No-one's trying (much) to rip you off, they all want you to have a good time, and just relax.
Jul 9th, 2008, 11:58 AM
#24
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I noticed in a lot of the smaller and rural towns that it's so expected that you have espresso after dinner that about 30% of the time it wasn't even on the bill.
Here's another tip about Italians taking their food very seriously... My husband is in Bologna right now with his little cousin, a 16 year old boy. He ordered a pizza off menu, by saying una pizza con salsiccia. Well it came out with just tomato sauce and sausage, he got exactly what he ordered, literally! So if you order "off menu", make sure to be very specific. Get a menu decoder book you can put in your pocket if your very picky about your food.
This isn't considered good manners anywhere, but don't break off a piece of bread from the bread basket and leave the other half. Take the entire piece of bread out and put it on your plate, even if you only want half.
You will not automatically get water in an Italian restaurant like you do in the States, you must order it. You also will not get ice, unless you ask for it, and even then not guaranteed. The water will be a cold or room temperature bottle and it goes fast if you order a small one! We always order 2 of the largest bottles and that seems to be just right for the two of us, but we drink a lot of water and never drink soda.
I love that it's perfectly acceptable to order a quarter liter caraf of wine which is less than a standard wine glass. This is just right for my husband and I, we're not big wine drinkers but like a little bit with dinner.
In most cases you don't need to tip in a restaurant unless the waiter did something extraordinary for you. The tip or "Servizio" is usually combined with the bread charge or "Coperto". In cases where the servizio is not included, it will be clearly written on your bill, then you should leave a few coins. In Italy, being a waiter is a respected and well paid profession, unlike here where they earn $2 an hour and rely on tips for the majority of their wages. That's why their wait service is so consistent and professional, at least IMO, there's no tip involved. I like that.
Here's another tip about Italians taking their food very seriously... My husband is in Bologna right now with his little cousin, a 16 year old boy. He ordered a pizza off menu, by saying una pizza con salsiccia. Well it came out with just tomato sauce and sausage, he got exactly what he ordered, literally! So if you order "off menu", make sure to be very specific. Get a menu decoder book you can put in your pocket if your very picky about your food.
This isn't considered good manners anywhere, but don't break off a piece of bread from the bread basket and leave the other half. Take the entire piece of bread out and put it on your plate, even if you only want half.
You will not automatically get water in an Italian restaurant like you do in the States, you must order it. You also will not get ice, unless you ask for it, and even then not guaranteed. The water will be a cold or room temperature bottle and it goes fast if you order a small one! We always order 2 of the largest bottles and that seems to be just right for the two of us, but we drink a lot of water and never drink soda.
I love that it's perfectly acceptable to order a quarter liter caraf of wine which is less than a standard wine glass. This is just right for my husband and I, we're not big wine drinkers but like a little bit with dinner.
In most cases you don't need to tip in a restaurant unless the waiter did something extraordinary for you. The tip or "Servizio" is usually combined with the bread charge or "Coperto". In cases where the servizio is not included, it will be clearly written on your bill, then you should leave a few coins. In Italy, being a waiter is a respected and well paid profession, unlike here where they earn $2 an hour and rely on tips for the majority of their wages. That's why their wait service is so consistent and professional, at least IMO, there's no tip involved. I like that.
Jul 9th, 2008, 12:52 PM
#25
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Miss Prism, your story is just so true. But it takes forever to get out of the supermarket with everybody digging to the bottom of their purse for those tiny euro cents--and then of course we all have to talk about the disappearance of the lira, the scam of the euro, how prices went up, et cetera, et cetera. And I'm trying to pay for is two items.
Giulia,
I'm fron New York City and California.
flanneruk,
I agree in general that Italians believe there are so many rules in their country, even they can't follow them all, but I have observed that among the MOST officious people in Italy are the people, usually men, who volunteer to stand inside churches and make sure decorum is maintained. They can be quite picky and even unpleasant, even when you're not making noise or doing anything other than silently admiring the religious art. They'll make up some new rule, and tell you not to do it!
Which brings us to another rule:
Italians are more insistent on tourists not wandering about or taking pictures in churches during actual mass or devotions.
Giulia,
I'm fron New York City and California.
flanneruk,
I agree in general that Italians believe there are so many rules in their country, even they can't follow them all, but I have observed that among the MOST officious people in Italy are the people, usually men, who volunteer to stand inside churches and make sure decorum is maintained. They can be quite picky and even unpleasant, even when you're not making noise or doing anything other than silently admiring the religious art. They'll make up some new rule, and tell you not to do it!
Which brings us to another rule:
Italians are more insistent on tourists not wandering about or taking pictures in churches during actual mass or devotions.
Jul 9th, 2008, 03:14 PM
#26
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Unless it has changed, when buying produce in a supermarket in Italy there are plastic gloves available. You put one on your hand before picking up any produce.
A little known etiquette rule. It is considered rude in Italy while sitting to have the toe of your shoe pointing up so that the sole of your shoe is facing other people. I always think of that when once in a great while I watch Oprah. She always seems to have the sole of her shoe facing out toward toward the audience and the camera.
And do not reach across others to shake hands with someone. That too is considered rude.
But Italians are use to having nonItalians in their country and unless one is "over the top" rude they usually are pretty tolerant people in most cases.
A little known etiquette rule. It is considered rude in Italy while sitting to have the toe of your shoe pointing up so that the sole of your shoe is facing other people. I always think of that when once in a great while I watch Oprah. She always seems to have the sole of her shoe facing out toward toward the audience and the camera.
And do not reach across others to shake hands with someone. That too is considered rude.
But Italians are use to having nonItalians in their country and unless one is "over the top" rude they usually are pretty tolerant people in most cases.
