Have You Ever Travelled with an Almost Stranger?
Feb 19th, 2006, 12:52 PM
#22
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Ha Ha... I wish I was going with on of my close gay friends. There would be no issue and they are all quite fit and hot! Though, how frustrating that would be 
Just kidding. And as far as a woman telling a guy she's a lesbian...for some men, that's even a BIGGER turn on. I'd rather be honest and say, "What? Ha hahaha, stop joking with me, you goof". Play stupid, then they can say, "Yeah, I'm just playing with ya, you're my homie". And then everyone is happy
LOL--maybe I should bring a traveling clothesline and an extra sheet, we can partition off the room. HAHA
But in all seriousness, it's not just the sexual stuff that COULD be (won't be in my case) awkward, but if the rooms are tiny and en-suite bathrooms are too, then there's not a lot of privacy to do bathroom necessities. (trying to keep it clean here). We'll have to agree that if one of us says, "Hey, I need ten minuets of privacy", then the other will leave the room.
LOL
Just kidding. And as far as a woman telling a guy she's a lesbian...for some men, that's even a BIGGER turn on. I'd rather be honest and say, "What? Ha hahaha, stop joking with me, you goof". Play stupid, then they can say, "Yeah, I'm just playing with ya, you're my homie". And then everyone is happy LOL--maybe I should bring a traveling clothesline and an extra sheet, we can partition off the room. HAHA
But in all seriousness, it's not just the sexual stuff that COULD be (won't be in my case) awkward, but if the rooms are tiny and en-suite bathrooms are too, then there's not a lot of privacy to do bathroom necessities. (trying to keep it clean here). We'll have to agree that if one of us says, "Hey, I need ten minuets of privacy", then the other will leave the room.
LOL
Feb 19th, 2006, 02:31 PM
#23
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Hi Tamara, I have had a lot of male friends throughout my life, all platonic friendships so I always chuckle when some say it is not possible.
About the trip..personally I would have separate rooms, but that is just me. I think 24/7 would get a bit tiresome and there certainly wouldn't be any privacy. Even when women friends want to travel with me I always let them know that I will need a room to myself. I just always need some quiet downtime by myself.
About the trip..personally I would have separate rooms, but that is just me. I think 24/7 would get a bit tiresome and there certainly wouldn't be any privacy. Even when women friends want to travel with me I always let them know that I will need a room to myself. I just always need some quiet downtime by myself.
Feb 19th, 2006, 02:37 PM
#24
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Hi, Tamara.
I fully believe that men and women can be just friends. However, the fact that you have only met this guy once is what bothers me. Anyone can pretend to be something they're not on a computer screen, also they can put on a good front in just one meeting. I like LoveItaly's idea for seperate rooms. I know that's more expensive, but I think it's worthwhile. It's very likely that all will go well and the two of you will be friends for life. But if this guy is not what he seems, at least you will not be stuck in a room with him. Please give this idea some thought.
I fully believe that men and women can be just friends. However, the fact that you have only met this guy once is what bothers me. Anyone can pretend to be something they're not on a computer screen, also they can put on a good front in just one meeting. I like LoveItaly's idea for seperate rooms. I know that's more expensive, but I think it's worthwhile. It's very likely that all will go well and the two of you will be friends for life. But if this guy is not what he seems, at least you will not be stuck in a room with him. Please give this idea some thought.
Feb 19th, 2006, 04:06 PM
#25
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I have shared rooms with members of the opposite sex with whom I was not romantically involved, and it worked out fine. However, I have decided that if it is at all possible, never to share a room with anyone, stranger or friend, ever again, since at the end of the day I like to retire to a space where I can read or sew in peace and quiet - and unfortunately, most of the people I know like to yak, yak, yak 24/7 (or so it seems to introverted me). My funniest room-sharing experience: I was travelling with three other women, one of whom had Tourette's syndrome (which we all knew about). What we didn't know - and my guess would be that she didn't know either - was that it occasionally manifested itself in the form of loud obscenities that she would scream out in the middle of the night. She slept right through it, but since I was in the twin bed next to her I of course couldn't. And I found out the next morning that the whole house had been awakened, including people on another floor!
Feb 19th, 2006, 04:20 PM
#26
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Tracey--That's sad, but funny.
I appreciate everyone's thoughts. Truly I do. The rooms are already booked. All with twin beds. Like I said, we already agreed that if it is at all awkward, then we cancel reservations and go our own ways. If that is the case (which I don't think will happen), I'll also change my seat so as to not sit with him the long plane ride home.
Either way, we will most likely not spend every waking hour together. I have no problem doing the trip alone. Mostly we agreed to go becaue it is a lot cheaper sharing expenses.
I appreciate everyone's thoughts. Truly I do. The rooms are already booked. All with twin beds. Like I said, we already agreed that if it is at all awkward, then we cancel reservations and go our own ways. If that is the case (which I don't think will happen), I'll also change my seat so as to not sit with him the long plane ride home.
Either way, we will most likely not spend every waking hour together. I have no problem doing the trip alone. Mostly we agreed to go becaue it is a lot cheaper sharing expenses.
Feb 19th, 2006, 04:32 PM
#27
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I went on a weekend trip with a guy I met only once, after chatting online for awhile. The trip was completely platonic, he was a total gentleman and we had a great time! I think you just have to go with your instincts...if your gut tells you it's going to be a problem, then listen to your gut. Otherwise, it's not a big deal!
PS The guy is now my boyfriend. LOL.
PS The guy is now my boyfriend. LOL.
Feb 19th, 2006, 05:11 PM
#29
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I told my travel buddy about this thread. First he thanked me for telling the world I found him repulsive. LOL, he's not. I just was making it clear to you guys that there is no romance involved here.
I was thinking about my own history meeting people I didn't know. Once I met a girl in a chat room. We talked about a girl's weekend in Vegas. That same night we talked once on the phone, booked air and hotels because we got such a good deal. We agreed to meet once before going. Still friends to this day. Even if we are very different. I also met this one girl via my weblog. We started chatting online. She took a trip out to where I lived (didn't stay with me though), we hung out for a couple days. Then, since we're both English teachers, we planned to attend a convention together and shared a room. Still pretty much only knowing eachother online. And then a little while later, I stayed with her for a week in NY.
So...my experiences (albeit these were girls) have been positive. I'm not gullible, not shy, and quite independent. I think these characteristics are key when travelling. Worse comes to worse, my travel pal and I despise eachother and go our own ways.
Oh, and he sleeps in shorts and t-shirt, cleared that and the bathroom privacy thing up. He's a good guy. I have no concerns. But I think this thread is interesting and made me think of some stuff.
It's hard to find people who can travel when you can, go to where you want to go, do similar things that you want to do, etc...
I was thinking about my own history meeting people I didn't know. Once I met a girl in a chat room. We talked about a girl's weekend in Vegas. That same night we talked once on the phone, booked air and hotels because we got such a good deal. We agreed to meet once before going. Still friends to this day. Even if we are very different. I also met this one girl via my weblog. We started chatting online. She took a trip out to where I lived (didn't stay with me though), we hung out for a couple days. Then, since we're both English teachers, we planned to attend a convention together and shared a room. Still pretty much only knowing eachother online. And then a little while later, I stayed with her for a week in NY.
So...my experiences (albeit these were girls) have been positive. I'm not gullible, not shy, and quite independent. I think these characteristics are key when travelling. Worse comes to worse, my travel pal and I despise eachother and go our own ways.
Oh, and he sleeps in shorts and t-shirt, cleared that and the bathroom privacy thing up.
He's a good guy. I have no concerns. But I think this thread is interesting and made me think of some stuff. It's hard to find people who can travel when you can, go to where you want to go, do similar things that you want to do, etc...
Feb 19th, 2006, 08:58 PM
#30
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Tamara, what does your mother think? (Sorry, I can't help but ask, although you're clearly well into adulthood.)
But on a practical note, many twin-bed rooms actually have the beds right next to each other, practically as close as if you had a double bed, and sometimes made up as a double bed.
But on a practical note, many twin-bed rooms actually have the beds right next to each other, practically as close as if you had a double bed, and sometimes made up as a double bed.
Feb 19th, 2006, 09:04 PM
#31
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Hi
I met a Canadian girl on the net and when she came to visit Stavanger where I live I took her to Preikestolen (see http://gardkarlsen.com/preikestolen.htm). After that we kept in touch and 2 years later she came to visit Norway again and once again she came to visit Stavanger and she stayed with my wife and I. So I guess you could say that we took in a stranger
Regards
Gard
http://gardkarlsen.com - trip reports and pictures
I met a Canadian girl on the net and when she came to visit Stavanger where I live I took her to Preikestolen (see http://gardkarlsen.com/preikestolen.htm). After that we kept in touch and 2 years later she came to visit Norway again and once again she came to visit Stavanger and she stayed with my wife and I. So I guess you could say that we took in a stranger
Regards
Gard
http://gardkarlsen.com - trip reports and pictures
Feb 19th, 2006, 09:48 PM
#32
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Will...My mother? LOL, that's funny. My parents know I'm going to Europe with a guy I met once. They think I know him through a friend of a friend. Neither my mom or dad are concerned about me going with this person. If so, they haven't said. My dad and step mom are glad I'm going. I think my dad, if anything, thinks sharing with a guy is odd. But I'm 32 (33 in May).
As far as the beds. In all 4 reservations, 3 of which we dealt with directly via email and one on the phone; it was made clear that we are not a couple and need separate beds. I've seen how some of the beds are so close. We'll push them apart as far as possible.
As far as the beds. In all 4 reservations, 3 of which we dealt with directly via email and one on the phone; it was made clear that we are not a couple and need separate beds. I've seen how some of the beds are so close. We'll push them apart as far as possible.
Feb 20th, 2006, 07:17 AM
#34
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Schuler...THIS has been discussed. He says he's been told he snores a little. Ear plugs are on the packing list! Plugs would have been on the list either way after reading so many hotel reviews where people said it was a loud street or old buildings had thin walls. Plus, I have a LONG plane flight too.
Feb 20th, 2006, 07:57 AM
#37
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Gee Cato, thanks for calling me pathetic in not so many words. Some people on Fodor's have just no common sense of politeness. Seriously, do you act this way in other countries? I hope not.
If you read the entire thread you'd see that first, this person IS a friend, but due to distance, we haven't hung out much. Spent a couple days together. Second, if we don't get along (I'd do this with a close friend as well), then we part and book our own accomodations. So no, it's not about the money solely. Though, sharing does leave money to spend on better things.
Again, thanks for feeling apathy.
(note--mucho sarcasm on my part here)
If you read the entire thread you'd see that first, this person IS a friend, but due to distance, we haven't hung out much. Spent a couple days together. Second, if we don't get along (I'd do this with a close friend as well), then we part and book our own accomodations. So no, it's not about the money solely. Though, sharing does leave money to spend on better things.
Again, thanks for feeling apathy.
(note--mucho sarcasm on my part here)
Feb 20th, 2006, 08:01 AM
#38
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I don't have advice for you as much an answer to your question.
Yes, I traveled with strangers, and I was taken in by strangers.
In the first case I was a homestay with an English couple for three weeks. It went very well, and of course this is more formalized through a program. My homestay went very well, and they invited me back for a weekend later during term, which was wonderful. We still correspond.
In the second case, I traveled with a girl I barely knew from my university to Scotland for four or five days. We stayed in hostels. It was an okay, but less than ideal trip because she hadn't packed well enough for rain, and although we discussed the visit to a loch, she wasn't really prepared for that either. But the true problem wasn't her lack of preparation, it was that she wasn't a good sport about when things went wrong. She also had a higher budget in mind on food than I did so we compromised there. We had no real disagreements, but I bit my lip a lot. We did split up some in Edinburgh, which was good for both of us.
I also was taken in by strangers when I was in Paris. A friend, a return-to-college student had invited me to share her room for three nights in Paris. But then she was going home. She asked me where I would stay and I indicated a hostel in Paris that was known to be quite cheap and I had in a separate pouch my train/ferry ticket and enough money to get me to London, and that I would just stay until my money ran out in Paris. Well, some American grad students heard me at the next table and they invited me to stay.
I did, and it was a wonderful experience. The guy was gay and he actually was moving out (but joined us at their get togethers). Originally I was going to stay with him but he had issues with his new apartment. So the girls had me stay with them instead, and they were just so very nice, and they had a dinner for me and introduced me to their French friends.
It is a real step out of your comfort zone, though, even when it goes well. You just cannot presume the other person knows your idiosyncracies. The people you are staying with may turn out to have their own personal crises which you may become partly caught up in.
I think your trip will work out fine Tamara. I hope my experiences are of help.
Yes, I traveled with strangers, and I was taken in by strangers.
In the first case I was a homestay with an English couple for three weeks. It went very well, and of course this is more formalized through a program. My homestay went very well, and they invited me back for a weekend later during term, which was wonderful. We still correspond.
In the second case, I traveled with a girl I barely knew from my university to Scotland for four or five days. We stayed in hostels. It was an okay, but less than ideal trip because she hadn't packed well enough for rain, and although we discussed the visit to a loch, she wasn't really prepared for that either. But the true problem wasn't her lack of preparation, it was that she wasn't a good sport about when things went wrong. She also had a higher budget in mind on food than I did so we compromised there. We had no real disagreements, but I bit my lip a lot. We did split up some in Edinburgh, which was good for both of us.
I also was taken in by strangers when I was in Paris. A friend, a return-to-college student had invited me to share her room for three nights in Paris. But then she was going home. She asked me where I would stay and I indicated a hostel in Paris that was known to be quite cheap and I had in a separate pouch my train/ferry ticket and enough money to get me to London, and that I would just stay until my money ran out in Paris. Well, some American grad students heard me at the next table and they invited me to stay.
I did, and it was a wonderful experience. The guy was gay and he actually was moving out (but joined us at their get togethers). Originally I was going to stay with him but he had issues with his new apartment. So the girls had me stay with them instead, and they were just so very nice, and they had a dinner for me and introduced me to their French friends.
It is a real step out of your comfort zone, though, even when it goes well. You just cannot presume the other person knows your idiosyncracies. The people you are staying with may turn out to have their own personal crises which you may become partly caught up in.
I think your trip will work out fine Tamara. I hope my experiences are of help.
Feb 20th, 2006, 08:07 AM
#39
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5alive--Good stories, thanks. I'm not really concerned anymore. I accept there will be some awkward moments. There will be a point when we get on each other's nerves. And in two weeks, there is plenty of time to say, "Hey, I'm doing my own thing today. We can meet up for dinner if you want." And, since we both agree to this...I'm content. By the way...we have a 8.5 hour flight to share before the trip. THAT is a lot of time. And we did spend a Friday night and then all day Saturday hanging out recently.
Feb 20th, 2006, 08:33 AM
#40
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Well, I've really enjoyed reading this thread - it impresses upon me how different people are in terms of what they look for when they travel. I have promised myself that I will never ever share a bedroom with a fellow traveller again, and that I will take 95% of my trips alone. But I am a huge introvert, and I think I have chosen previous travel partners very badly (I have more horror stories than the Tourette's syndrome gal!). So I pay more to travel alone - and I make that sacrifice because I know that spending a lot of time with others (or at least the others I've met) will not lend itself to fun or relaxation. Frankly, it's a bit a budget crunch - and I am 40, own my own home, and have a good job! But I envy you, TamaraEden; it looks like you've had good experiences with travelling with others. And you remind me that getting outside of one's comfort zone is a primary reason to travel.
