Dennise79

I have a 3,5 month old, and my hubby and I want to go to rome for our 10th anniversary. I am dying to go to Rome, and being its our anniversary and me still on the maternity leave, we thought it would be nice.


On the other hand, we are planning to go on February, which can be very cold, and Ela (my DD) will be away from home for a week.

I am FTM and I really cannot decide. Ela is usually a calm baby with an occasional crying fit. We are not very rich, so its not going to be a 5 star hotels, we will stay in a nice B&B's.


Please help!!!! I cannot decide and I am going crazy over thinking it.


In one vision I see myself visiting museums with my angel sleeping in her stroller and we are very glad that we went. On other, we are sleepless, cranky, cold and stuck in rome with a crying baby on our 10th anniversary!!

Please advise! We thought on going somewhere tropic first, like Bali or Phuket but then I changed my mind because of the baby's sunlight exposure will be too much.

kevin_widrow

Isn't this what grandparents are for?

-Kevin

Dennise79

But I am still breastfeeding, and I think it will be too harsh for the baby to leave her when she is this little...

Sassafrass

It might sound a little crazy, but might Grandparents go along to help out with the baby and give you and hubby some private times? If not, I think you will be Ok. You are right. Baby is too young to leave at home.
Best of Luck.

WillTravel

Unless the weather is most extraordinary (which could happen given what's gone on lately), I don't think Rome in February qualifies as "very cold". It could be rainy, though. Look up the trip report that the poster "mebe" did about her visit to Rome with her husband and young daughter.

If you can only go for a week, I personally would be a bit reluctant. The flight will be long, the jetlag annoying, and you'll barely have time to recover before it's time to go back.

zeppole

If you promise to leave the museum if your sleeping angel wakes up and starts testing the acoustics, I'll feel more cheerful about encouraging you to go.

But in all honesty, while it can be mild and pleasant in February in Rome, the risk of chilly, wet weather is high. And Rome is mainly a city of outdoor touristing, and even much of the indoor touristing (such as churches) is in unheated places.

Are you talking about this February or next? Since November of this year, Italy has been having a very stormy and cold winter, with some freezing days and a lot of downpours, and people have been surprised by the way it has stuck. Also note that Italians tend to believe putting on sweaters rather than turning up the heat is the way to deal with cold interiors, so you'd have to clear all this in advance with your B&B owners.

Think you'll still be married in a few more months? I suggest waiting for the angel to be of an age when you feel more comfortable leaving her in the care of others, and hightail to Rome in April or even late September (when you might even want to bring her along).

Dennise79

thanks a lot all! i think i am going to postpone after all -sigh-

i was kinda thniking that she wouldnt tolerate museums and such when she was bigger, but it is too much to risk to take her in this cold.

congrats to all brave parents who can take wild trips with their childeren, this mama is scared!

quokka

Scared - why? Italian babies survive the winter well (as do babies in Iceland, by the way), and a baby is easier to handle and less nuisance to everyone around you than a screaming energetic toddler running among people's feet.

Many museums don't let prams and strollers in (understandably, too many thieves have used that trick in the past). Bring a sling in addition to the stroller to carry the hopefully sleeping angel in for such cases. If it is really cold outside it will also be easier to keep her warm if she is in a sling close to Mum's or Dad's body.

zeppole

Italians are actually quite fanatical about drafts and chill -- and if you live here, you know why! -- and thus it is not common to see small babies being hauled around a lot outdoors in the cooler months. That is indeed what nonni are for. The babies get left behind.

I agree with you that babies are tougher than the rest of us, but I would be concerned about taking a child that small on a transatlantic flight and then walking around outdoors most of the day, several days in a row, and being in chilly unheated churches. Rome really doesn't offer a lot of huge well heated museums (say, like Paris), nor does it have a good public transportation system.

zeppole

By the way, I wasn't suggesting waiting until the baby can walk. I was suggesting waiting until the baby is 6 or 9 mos old. She will be heavier, but probably not much more tempermental -- and it won't matter, because nobody cares if your baby cries in the piazza or the Forum or by the fountain at the outdoor cafe.

catherinehaas

Rome is a place that everyone should experience at least once. The historical sites are unbelievable. With all of that being said, I would caution against taking the little ones. It is a LONG flight, almost torture unless you are in first class. Staying at B&B's can also present itself with issues with the little ones. I held off from taking my child until he was about to turn 21 (Happy Bday present). I was able to experience it with him and neither of us will ever forget it. I highly encourage your taking the trip, just not with the little ones at these ages. If you plan (for me, it took a great deal of planning to stick to the budget - Italy is EXPENSIVE), you will be much more happy. This is your anniversary and it should be magical. Not a nightmare and there are too many things that could cause it not to be so on an international venture even without taking the kids. Adding them to the mix is just another variable.

How about a cruise? I am thinking the weather is probably nicer and there are plenty of activities for kids (i.e. much more kid friendly). Never been on one but the Disney Line is suppose to be wonderful... Just a thought...

littlejane

Hi Dennise

We have a 2 year old and have been on a lot of trips.

I can safely say now that the easiest trip we took was for a week when she was 3.5 months old. She was less needy, i.e. all she needed was food and sleep, and generally we could time our meals so that she was asleep and we got some nice peace and together time.

As she gets older, she is more conscious of routines, bedtimes, familiar food etc etc and while I still love travelling with her, none of the trips are as easy as the first one.

You didn't say where you live? If it's a long flight, my own experience was that at 3 months my daughter was more manageable than at any time in the following 2+ years. I wouldn't take a long flight now because she just wouldn't have the patience for it, and I would be uncomfortable with the idea of her being that horrible screaming child we've all sat beside on a plane at some stage.

I'd say you should go for it now!

kcapuani

Another vote telling you to go as soon as possible. It only gets harder as they get older and are awake for longer stretches of time. At 9 months, she'll be down to 2 naps and you'll have to work a lot harder to entertain her, especially on the plane. Plus, the summer will be prime season and therefore all the more expensive.

What about going towards the end of March/beginning of April? When I was there over Easter, the temp was in the high 60's.

Bitter

You will experience both scenarios: Sleeping angel and cranky, crying baby. The latter will come at the most worst time (for us it was in the middle of the overnight flight; yes, that was us, sorry). You'll still have a decent time, but you'll be exhausted (more than usual).

zeppole

I also want to put myself in the camp of telling people who have small children that Italy can be a great destination, and Rome is in Italy. I also believe babies are obviously easier travelling companions than more active kids.

All that said, please bear in mind that have been "there" (is that Rome?) once in Spring does not mean someone else will have your weather experience -- or mine. One of the many times I was in Rome it was the first week of April and we had chill wind and blowing drizzle, enough to give anybody a cold if they were doing what people normally do in Rome: walk around, outdoors, six hours a day. Somebody with a baby really has to think about.

Rome in particular does not have a good public transportation system. So that means having a small child outdoors, on the air-polluted streets, in possibly wet and chill weather -- unless you spring for taxis (not always easy to find in wet weather in Rome).

Personally, if I was the mother of a small child, I'd rather put up with the added complications of the child being older and bigger and more active on my trip, than all the worry of marching a baby around in Rome's highly unpredictable Spring weather.

They don't call Rome "the eternal city" for nothing. It will be there when the baby is 6mos or 9mos.

zeppole

Just to drive the point home (I'm on a tear here), some of you are basing your advice on trips with babies to places other than Rome. My advice might have changed had Dennise said she wanted to go to Venice in February (although it can be quite cold there, and I'd want her to spring for a reliably warm hotel).

But Rome in February is not a great idea for a 20 week old baby. And I don't think pushing somebody to take a baby to Rome in winter to avoid the possibility in summer or fall the baby will more loudly annoy fellow seat passengers and thus embarrass the parents is terribly thoughtful advice

poutine

I took my four month old (and husband) to Bryce, Vegas, Grand Canyon etc. It is a four hour flight for me. I would not hesitate if you are in the UK, however if we are talking a 9 or 10 hour flight from where you live, I probably would not do it. I would find somewhere closer to celebrate with your husband and baby, and save Rome for another time.

Wherever you go.....based on my experience, I would buy a really good baby carrier (a Baby Bjorn type front carrier) to carry Ela in. Babies will be much happier when they are warm and snugly next to Mommy or Daddy. Your movement lulls them into a more comfortable state, and they are generally more content. When they get to 7 months or more, strollers are better as baby is heavier, and they are more interested in what is going on around them.

Rome will not be colder than it is in Canada, and properly dressed babies are outside in winter here all the time.

Your baby won't howl for a week straight, however there will surely be a point when she will be crying and you are at a location where you wish she wasn't. That's going to happen more than once! Figure out what settles her down best and if all else fails, be prepared to leave if it is truly disturbing other people. Maybe if you have a museum pass of some sort, you can come and go more than once, when she is content. Definitely keep your sense of humour around.

To a couple of posters who suggested the grandparents....well, not all grandparents feel that is their "job". My parents are unable to look after my kids, and my in- laws are a "hands off" style of grandparent (in the words of my sister-in-law). Either we travel with the kids, or we can't travel at all.

Seriously, babies at that age only care about Mommy (and Daddy). If they are comfortable, they are happy. Trying to take a 2 year old to museums in Rome will be MUCH harder!

poutine

After reading Zeppole's post, I have not been to Rome in February, so perhaps postponing until March or April may be wise (if you are still on mat leave).

However, waiting until they are 9 months old puts you in a different ball park. My oldest started walking at 9 months, and did NOT want to be in a backpack, stroller or anything else that restrained his newfound freedom. I imagine Rome would not have been a good choice in that case.

Barbara_in_FL

Traveling with a nursing baby is fantastic. I mean, take her back later if you want her to have her own memories, but if you have the means to go, there is no reason to wait.

I agree that it's a long trip for the risk of some inhospitable weather, so a short postponement might work best -- but really, there is nothing to be "scared" of. You're not going to Antarctica!

If you wait until 6-9 months, I would suggest that you acclimate her all along to whatever carrier or backpack you would use on the trip. We used a backpack very successfully with my younger son until he was 2, but I'm not sure he would have liked it if we put him in it for the first time on vacation. My older son loved the Snugli, hated the sling. So figure out now what she likes, and take her for walks in it even if you don't really "need" to.

zeppole

"Rome will not be colder than it is in Canada, and properly dressed babies are outside in winter here all the time."

I find it next to impossible to believe that parents in Canada take 20 week old babies walk around outside for 6 hours or so in chilly weather. Rome is not Paris. It's not like you take a short walk or hop in a taxi and get dropped off at the Louvre and spend the day there, and get another taxi (or metro or bus) and go back to your hotel, or another museum. People go to Rome to see the fountains, the piazzas, the extensive ruins, and the churches, which aren't heated.

"Your baby won't howl for a week straight, however there will surely be a point when she will be crying and you are at a location where you wish she wasn't. " Yes, and that location might be someplace far from your hotel where you can't find a taxi or bus (or have to wait for a bus for a half hour) or you can't readily find anything open for free where you can sit down comfortably because it's the pausa or a Sunday.

I can't really address the issue of walking nine-month-olds who don't want to be in strollers as to whether Rome is a good destination, but I will point out that Rome is filled with wonderful piazzas and pedestrianized zones, in addition to the forum.

"Trying to take a 2 year old to museums in Rome will be MUCH harder!|

How true. So don't take them there. Two-year-olds and three-year-olds and babies in general however small don't belong in museums! Fortunately, most people don't go to Rome to go to museums. If it is a priority for you, take turns with your spouse babysitting.