susani

My 53 yr. old sister is flying with me to NYC in Feb.This is her first time to fly. She recently heard of someone having a panic attack inflight and is now sure she will do the same. Do any of you know how often these actually occur or do you have any helpful hints that I can offer her. Thank you

happytrailstoyou

It sounds like she's working herself into a frenzy. Maybe she should go via Amtrack or Greyhound.

sportychick

I think the best think to do is be calm, reassuring, and have a sense of humor about it. And don't spend a lot of time talking to her about it, that will just let her work herself into a frenzy, as happytrailsto you said. A reassuring hand on the shoulder is nice, too. People will disagree with me, but sitting near kids is great -- especially the ten-year olds... they're never scared, they're in awe, and watching their joy is a great way to get over the fear of turbulence. Good luck!

jodeenyc

This brings to mind that scene in French Kiss where Kevin Kline manages to distract and start a fight with Meg Ryan so that she misses the takeoff. One of my favorite movies.

I also have a hard time with flying and I've had no problems going to my doctor and getting medications to take in flight that basically knock me out. Whether or not you want to go that route is a personal choice.

There are also people - therapists and others -that can teach your sister breathing techniques that can help calm her. I have a friend that taught another how to breathe during her pregnancy and she experienced little to no paid during childbirth. Not entirely the same as flying but the same technique.

Do you think it's flying or flying into NYC? I feel for your sister because I've had the same panic feelings. I hope it works out.

NeoPatrick

I thought that was why they served booze on airlines?

beanweb24

Does she have a history of panic and/or anxiety? If so, she may want to talk to her doctor about options for medications. If not, then she should know that some people do have panic attacks on airplanes, in restaurants, in museums, in malls, in buses, etc. For some people, panic attacks are an unfortunate part of their daily routine.

She might also want to do some research on flying. Here's one idea of a place to start:

http://www.fearofflyinghelp.com/

toedtoes

I would let her know that it is very rare for someone to have a panic attack and that she shouldn't worry or listen to the "horror stories", that you'll be with her the whole time and that you've flown before and she'll be just fine. Make sure she has a good book, etc. to keep her busy during the flight. Just be reassuring and calm with her and she should get through it just fine.

LucieV

I would not discount the possibility of a panic attack. I've never had one, but I've twice been with someone who's had one and it's no joke at all. Truly a terrifying experience.

Also, my younger-than-me cousin, a big strapping rugby player, has recently begun having panic attacks when flying (until he was about 30, he flew everywhere, no problem.) Ironically, his mom was a career flight attendant. I think he finally took some sort of special course. He actually did have to disembark the plane on one trip, but he's managed to fly a few times since. I don't know for sure, but I think he takes Ativan. His wife is wonderful about the whole thing...her attitude is that if they get where they're going, great; if not, that's the breaks, she's not going to force him to fly if he can't.

escargot

All good suggestions, but you know your sister best - is she likely the type that could work herself into a panic attack mode? I once had this experience with a woman next to me, and we just yakked through the whole take off and once through a tiny 'bump' she held on to my hand, which was fine with me, and she ended up ok once things settled down and we leveled off - however, if you think she could work herself up to a nervous level that could affect her actually getting on the plane, is the possibility of a small amount of medication something she would consider?

I know several people in my family who take anywher efrom 1/2 pill to a full one of a relaxing medication their physician prescribes, it might be worth a thought - she could try it once a week or so before the trip to see it only relaxes her, and it might just help knowing she has it and she may not then even use it (which happened to a friend of mine) - or , she'll take it that morning and it might take the edge off. just a thought.

LucieV

Maybe we're talking about different things here. Panic attacks aren't self-induced, i.e., it isn't like "a case of nerves" before a public speaking engagement or something. A panic attack is a very real, very frightening mind-body experience, and it is not something that a person can simply be "talked out of" by a well-meaning person. If, however, you are not talking about your sister being at risk for a clinical panic attack, susanj, I apologize for making a bigger deal out of this than necessary!

schmerl

Valium, Ativan, and Xanax all work well for anxiety.

HKP

You know your sister and how likely she might be to actually have a panic attack -- if likely, by all means get her to a doc who can give her a "short" prescription for something but with two comments: 1. just having it (and not taking it) might be enough, but 2. it's worth a trial run of the drug before you leave to learn how she'll respond to it.

HOWEVER, the more you talk about the panic attack as the primary issue of the trip, the more it will be. Get her to focus on New York City, what you'll do, etc. etc. Rent videos about it if you can find them.

Then have some "tasks" you can do on the plane, like organizing restaurant possibilities -- or else have some other distraction like a new escapist novel or trashy magazines (I like listening to comedy on my iPod).

Keep in mind, yourself and your sister, that the flight will only be just a matter of [however long it will be], and the experience in the city will be the bulk of your time and experience.

kelliebellie

I actually saw a psychologist about my fear of flying and it helped a lot. I can give you his tips.

First concentrate on how it is an irrational fear. Driving to the airport was where I was going to die, not on the plane. Plane travel is the safest form of travel in the world.

Breathe. Count to 3 on the inhale, pause 2, then blow out 7, pause 2 and repeat.

He said my fear stemed from me living in the future and not the present. Concentrate on the present. Tune into the five senses. Think about your fingers and what are they touching. Is it soft or hard, smoothe or bumpy? Repeat for the other senses. This was very relaxing for me.

Get her a window seat. I'm afraid of heights, but it actually helps me a lot to be able to see the ground. Plus it will maybe turn her fear to awe.

Maybe have some medication handy.


A women on our last flight was having a panic attack. The flight attendants let her lie down in the back across a row of seats. So even if she were to have a panic attack, it would be okay. I'm sure they deal with it all the time.

I fly now all the time with no problems. I'm still not crazy about the take off, but what can you do?

vjpblovesitaly

LucieV,

Do you have any idea what causes panic attacks? My sisters have them and I can't relate to them at all. I hope I don't ever get one.

One of my sister's claims she had one once because her dentist used coconut flavored toothpaste or something and she hates coconut.

escargot

I think there are many levels of panic attacks and anxiety attacks, nervousness in certain situations, etc. I have a friend who can not sit in the front at church, she feels confined and trapped for some reason - when she had to at a recent family funeral, we did what we have done before when she'd been in those situations, and she has me sit in the last row, seated on the aisle, so she can turn and see me, and for some reason when she feels the anxiety building up, if she can see me, near the door, she knows she is ok - I can't explain why that works for her, but it does.

Sometimes, when we are in other situations and she starts to get nervous and says she 'feels' a panic attack coming on, and she gets sweaty, says her heart is beating out of her chest, and panics and feels as she says, 'it is taking over my body' and sometimes she'll say 'i know i'm working myself up but I can't stop it' - and sometimes talking to her works and sometimes we have to remove her from the situation, and in some situations she now knows she needs to take something (medication) before she can do certain unavoidable things -

I can only imagine it must be an awful feeling, feeling that you can't control how nervous you get and feeling out of control - I sympathize with every one who has them on whatever level -

and I have learned from my daughter, who has a fear of flying, but does fly and takes medication when she does, that she will say, she knows it doesn't make rational sense, but she just can't feel comfortable the minute she arrives at an airport, and she tried many other things first before the medication - sometimes in the beginning when I'd say to her, 'how are you doing?" - as she was rapidly flipping through a book and/or using an ipod, she'd say mom, dont' talk to me, don't ask me, it makes me worse." -

so everyone is different....I wish you luck though - and your sister, perhaps just sharing with her that others have had panic feelings, and some of the web links people here have given you, and if she doesn't feel calmer, maybe asking her doctor.

escargot

and ask kelliebelli said, my daughter also prefers the window seat and does a similar breathing technique - let us know how it works out - and a trip report of all the fun you had !

beanweb24

Here's for more on panic/anxiety disorder:

http://tinyurl.com/25yhad

During a panic attack, the fear response is out of proportion for the situation, which often is nonthreatening.... meaning your sister's experience would be inline with that definition.

As LucieV said, there is a big distinction between a serious case of nerves and clinical panic/anxiety attacks. I am very close to a person with clinical panic/anxiety, and it can be terrifying. Thankfully, clinical attacks can be lessened (in severity and frequency) with medication.

beanweb24

Just to clarify... When I mentioned "your sister," I was referring to vjpblovesitaly's sister at the dentist and not the OPs sister.

girlonthego

susan, Have her go to the doctor and get a mild sedative. It will be just enough to take the edge off.

My mother is terrified of flying and guess who got to sit next to her every flight...ME! So, I was a nervous flier and used to take valium to get on a plane. I am very over that now and don't mind it at all. It may be that I am not flying with mom any more
The worst is the takeoff. It is a very unnatural feeling for most people. Once the plane levels off, she should be fine. I would go with the mild sedative to relax her before she gets on the plane. It should take effect for the takeoff and just make her tired. Bring some magazines, because it is easier to focus on the short articles.
And most of all be reassuring. Having someone calm next to you is very important.

suze

Does she have a history of panic attacks? As others mention, it a very real and very scary thing... not just "oh i'm awful nervous getting on a plane".

If she does she should be traveling with a prescription anti-anxiety medication such as Xanax or Valium.

If she has never had a panic attack before, it is unlikely she'll have her first one on this flight. You might have her read up a bit on the condition so she understands it is something some people suffer from, not that a single plane flight would probably cause in someone who does not suffer from them.