We are hoping to go to Switzerland and Northern Italy this summer. I have read books and many travel threads, but still can't figure out the best route and stops along the way. We were hoping to fly to Zurich in early July and then take about a week to make our way to Lake Como to meet up with family. Places people have told me to visit include Lucerne, Berner Oberland (Murren & Grindelwald in particular), and Zermatt/Matterhorn. There doesn't seem to be an easy way to hit all of these places without lots of travel time and back tracking. Should we skip Zermatt if we are seeing Lucerne and Berner Oberland or is the Matterhorn a must-see? We may also go to Venice and Cortina in the Dolomites after Lake Como to meet up with more family. We are two adults with a 10-year-old who are up for hikes, museums/culture, boat rides, and other outdoor adventures. Just trying to minimize changing hotels and super-long travel days. Please let me know what you think the best route to take would be! We have never been to Switzerland or Italy before. Thank you!

Yes, it would be best to skip Zermatt and the Matterhorn on this trip.

Swittzerland is a small country. Train rides are very scenic, but not particularly long. some examples:
Zurich airport - Zermatt (1 train change): 3 1/2 hrs, trains every 30 - 60 minutes
Zermatt - Interlaken (2 changes): 2 1/4 hrs, trains every 30 - 60 minutes
Interlaken - Lucerne (direct): 1 h 50 min, trains every hr
Lucerne - Como (0-3 changes, according to the train): 2 1/4 hrs, trains every 30 - 60 minutes
Zurich airport - Lucerne (direct): 1 1/4 hrs, trains every 30 minutes
Zermatt - Locarno - Como (3 changes): 5 1/2 hrs, every 1-2 hrs
Zermatt - Gallarate - Como: (3-5 changes):5 1/2 hrs, irregular intervals

Are you driving or using public transportation?

If driving, avoid the tunnel, go to Andermatt and look for the road going over the St Gotthard pass.

Como - Verona - Toblach - Cortina d'Ampezzo: 7 1/2 hrs, 3times daily
Zurich - Innsbruck - Toblach - Cortina d'Ampezzo: 8 1/4 hrs, 3times daily