louise1928

One of my co-workers just returned from her first trip to Europe (Paris and Italy), and all in all her experience was about a 7..I will not go into detail about it, but to make a long story short, she did not do enough research. One of the first things I mentioned to her, when she announced she was going to Paris with her boyfriend for 8 days...I said, do plenty of research. I even gave her website forums to visit for lodging, food, sightseeing, etc. reviews. Only number 1 complaint was food!!! She said she spent most of her time eating at McDonald's. What a waste i thought. She said to me, "forget about pancakes and bacon in Paris, it doesn't exist. I said, were you expecting it to?? You are in Europe, not New York. Although she had some memorable moments, most of what she experienced could have been better had she planned better. I definitely plan to visit Paris in next 2-3 years, and I will have a notebook full of tips, suggestions, etc, to bring along. But as some do say, Experience is the best teacher..She said she has no plans to return....

Nomadic1

Louise,

That's a good lesson for all who travel. Everyone should do their research to ensure they get the most for their time and money. Personally, I never go overseas without months of planning. I know the city layout, attractions, my hotel, and a few restaurants before I arrive.

Your friend made a common mistake as I know others who wing it and pay the price. McDonald's in Paris. Nothing like a big mac when world class cuisine is available.

David

Marilyn

louise, some people have a fantasy about what travel is like, especially to a dream destination like Paris. Ah, so romantic, so beautiful. Who knew you actually had to choose a restaurant and make a reservation?

When they get there, it turns out they don't really like the experience of being in a different culture. They want their morning pancakes -- forget about the delicious croissants at every corner cafe and the fabulous crepes on every street corner. People who want things to be the same as they are at home are not really meant to travel!

KathyNZ

I would ask your friend if she really wanted to do this trip in the first place. Doesn't sound like it to me.

ira

Hi louise,

If you read Mark Twain's "Innocents Abroad" you will find your friend among one of the characters.

"la plus ca change, la plus c'est la meme chose"

NYCFoodSnob

"She said she has no plans to return"

Paris rejoices!

Chatters

I am with NYC on this one--- if she is planning never to return to Paris ............HOORAY!!

CafeBatavia

Who eats pancakes and bacon every morning anyway? This isn't the 1950's.
Tongue in cheek comment, but still much truth there.

Some people are just lazy and expect a wonderful trip to just "fall into place" for them. When the trip is a bust, they blame the place they visited and not themselves. Others just don't appreciate what europe has to offer - never have, never will!

Got a sister who is bored to tears with Europe, but loves Orlando. Go figure!

Sue_xx_yy

As a card-carrying obsessive compulsive, I will not be one to speak against research. But I accept that people's tolerance for novelty varies. One person's delightfully new cuisine experience is another person's goat's eyeball stew. In addition to individual variation, I have a suspicion that for any given individual, the point at which cultural differences cross from being novelty to overwhelming is malleable to a point, but not indefinitely. For example, I'm at ease in Europe; certain parts of Asia I would happily try if I could afford the airfare, but I can see myself balking at trying to go it alone through Calcutta, India or Cape Verde or Barundi, no matter how much research I did. I think I'd need some haven of familiarity in those places myself, even if it was McDonald's.

sfowler

Amen to what has been said -- and a recommendation -- leave her out of the loop as YOU plan

Travelling isn't simply moving your body -- it's mental, spiritual and emotional movings also. So the preparation goes beyond plane & hotel reservations.

NYCFoodSnob

There's no question a first time visit to a foreign culture can be daunting. Thank goodness there are plenty of travelers who overcome their fear and fall in love with a place in spite of the inherent obstacles. Every new experience offers unknown challenges and surprises. Personality, attitude, and motivation help define a person's pleasure principle.

It never bothers me when I meet people and discover they have no love for Paris or Rome. Once I recover from the momentary shock that such a person actually exists, I know to move on in the crowd and seek out others.

Research alone will not quell all fears of a foreign experience. The most important fear to conquer is the language barrier. I was lucky. My introduction to France and Italy many, many years ago included a multi-lingual guide. My immersion into each culture was vicariously influenced and I knew, almost immediately, that learning both languages would be key to my future enjoyment.

Learning a few key words and phrases can alter an experience dramatically for the better. Engaging in simple conversation can lead to lasting, loving friendships, even for a first time visitor.

P_M

You should be thankful that you did not go with her on this trip. I went on a trip to Monterrey, Mexico once with someone who kept getting mad because things are so "different" there, and the people simply refuse to speak English!! Well gee, imagine that.... It can really ruin your trip to travel with someone so narrow-minded. Since then I am much more selective in choosing my travelling companions. I too am glad she'll never go back, just as my former friend will probably never leave the US again either.

P. S. Whenever I am out of the US, I make it a rule NEVER to eat at American franchises.

Scarlett

I am bewildered and thankful when I read posts such as this.
All my planning and wishing to be in some country/city ,then my arrival- always brings me joy and excitement.
I relish in the "foreign-ness" of everything - food, accents,fashion,getting lost, it is all a great adventure and I ultimately feel that my life is fuller for it, including any mis-adventures along the way.
I am sorry for your co-worker, she lost out on something very special.

cigalechanta

"Paintings and music, street noises, shops, flower markets, modes, fabrics, poems, ideas, everything seemed to lead toward a half-sensual, half-intellectual swoon. Inside the cafés, color, perfume, taste and delirium could be poured together from one bottle or many bottle-from square, cylindrical, conical, tall, squat, brown, green or crimson bottles-but you drank black coffee by choice, believing that Paris itself was sufficient alcohol."
-Malcom Cowley, Exile's Return

francophile03

I like McDonalds but to go to Europe and eat there most of the time is unbelievable. There are so many cafes, restaurants, bakeries, etc. on every street in Paris for example.
In this case I think it's not so much lack of doing the research but not being able to adapt to a new place.

rex

<<You should be thankful that you did not go with her on this trip.>>

<<I can see myself balking at trying to go it alone through Calcutta, India or Cape Verde or Barundi, no matter how much research I did. I think I'd need some haven of familiarity in those places>>

I quite disagree with the first statement, and quite agree wth the second.

If a friend of mine had a trip/experience like this - - was for some reason off my "radar screen", and made such a trip, and I never had any chance to talk to them beforehand - - I would be deeply chagrined that I had been unable to help them enjoy it, just as "we" help people here everyday.

How many of us have NEVER gone somewhere, on which we have not really prepared adequately, at least on some level?

Louise's friend - - like a disgruntled customer of a store - - will spread negative "press" about her trip, perhaps more vociferouly than if she had just an "okay" experience.

Pity.

Why I, or Rick Steves, or any of the rest of "us" should choose to be evangelical about all the "good stuff" one can find in Europe, I don't uite know.

It just feels right, I guess.

Best wishes,

Rex

MelJ

Rex, think about your reply a bit more. To disagree with the first statement is to say that, as a friend, one should be happy to do the research and spend the money to go with someone who took the lazy way out and failed to appreciate her surroundings because she chose not to plan. If the co-worker were financing my trip I'd have no problem playing tour guide, but I could hardly afford (money OR time-wise) to be their instructor and take responsibility for teaching them to love a foreign country. No fun for me and would probably lead to resentment on my part.

You mention "having the opportunity to talk to them beforehand..." Well, she did. She even found Web site forums for her. I feel that, as a co-worker, she extended herself as much as she could without being overly pushy and "evangelical" about it.

Sue_xx_yy

I dunno Rex, I think that there is a limit to what any person with only ordinary training could do to help.

I'm thinking that the reaction of Louise's friend might be almost a form of - is it agoraphobia that is the fear of new places? As for the fear of flying, it could be related to a fear of loss of control. One would need to know how to 'desensitize' the person, and I for sure don't have the training to do this, though I suppose I would try if my own travel mate were having this problem.

Of course, it might not be so serious as I'm making it out. After all, even the most enthusiastic traveler needs to figure out a way to take a vacation from his/her vacation from time to time. For some, that could be as simple as splurging on the chance to have a quiet drink in a safe, secure upscale bar. For others, it could be some time spent in an Internet cafe chatting with people back home and catching up on home news. Maybe louise's friend was counting on those pancakes in the morning to kind of re-centre herself, and as said pancakes weren't available, she found herself with no respite from her disorientation.

tim10x

This reminds me of a time in Rome when our tour group went to a local cafe for "pizza". One elderly lady, after a few bites, stated "It don't taste like the pizza we get in Alabama". By the way, I don't eat at McDonalds in this country.

Carolanne

I don't quite know how to say this, knowing that each person's take on things abroad is very personal, but having travelled only on a shoestring in my youth, when there were no francises in Europe, and we ate plenty of fish and chips and knockwurst, I have to tell you what happened when I went to Italy last year for 9 weeks with my two teenagers. We don't eat fast food here as a rule. My kids (20 now and 15) know it's sugar and salt dressing up zero nutrition, and as a cultural icon or export it's crummy - But - we had lunch at the MacD's by the Spanish Steps, at the Burger King in Venice And at the MacD's on strada Nuova as well as the one near the Convento San Marco in Florence. The places were usually packed with 95% Italian youth in groups and young couples. Granted we had a relatively long time in Italy and they also got to try many, many new things, in restaurants, and from grocery stores for our apartments and picnics. I really didn't have the heart to say no, and I'll tell you they enjoyed it tremendously. For the chance to see groups of other teens, and see the smiles on my kids faces, it was worth feeling a little "pro-american". We also stopped at several Autostrade reststops, which is to my mind the Italian version of fast food for essential the same reasons. And, we had Chinese and Mexican too! I did do extensive research and none of these stops were "planned", and I did get my fill of fine dining. I guess my point is those places didn't open there just for the tourists to feel "at home", and for better or for worse they're now part of That culture too. Anyone under 25 might like it just for the heck of it - it's something both the kids tell about as events of our trip - and, for this oldster, they always have a bathroom and "feel" plenty Italian. If you can enjoy wherever you find yourself in a foreign country IMHO the trip was worth it. The trouble with your friend is not that she ate at the dreaded place, but that she didn't enjoy it!