Back to the original post, I can only assume that Robmac is volunteering to pay the penalty owing for the late report. It's this type of Scottish comraderie that warms the soul on those chilly nights on the heath. A vegetarian that played rugby? This cannot have been contemporaneous events.

Just a moment!

PAY!!!!

I'm afraid that that just does not compute.

I've gone all faint.

I'm sorry, but given the intent of the OP and your obvious willingness to come to the defense of a fellow countryperson, the only possible conclusion is that you were interceding as a guarantor. 14,384.26 Kip is due immediately. However, this can be waived only by the submission of an original verse in honor of the afore-mentioned "Bobby".

Sae help ma Boab,

Aricht 'en

Here goes

Wee, sleeket, cowran, tim'rous beastie,
O, what panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi' bickering brattle!
I wad be laith to rin an' chase thee,
Wi' murd'ring pattle!

And any more references to "Bobby" and I'll be sending marauding clans to Needham--wherever that is.

Sorry, I just realized that you wanted an "Original" verse. You wouldn't think that I worked in the printing trade now would you?

I'm afraid that I don't have an original bone in my body.

For instance:

There once was a man from Aberdeen
Whose thoughts and deeds were seldom clean.
But travelling to Chiang Mai
Straightened out this bad guy
And he's acheived the Golden Mean.

Marauding clans would be an improvement in Needham. It would raise both the moral fiber and the dress code. Pandas live in Cambridge (our fair city).

I'm afraid that I am going to hurt you to the core.

I mistook you for Rhkkmk!!!

OK here is my feeble attempt at poetry:--

There once was a panda named Andy,
Who always drank ale and shandy.
He drank all day long.
Until he looked like king kong.
And his legs turned quite bandy.

Michty me!

Fit hiv a sterted?



ODE TO A PEDANTIC GPANDA

with apologies to haggis and Robert Burns (or his modern misnomer - Rabbie)
NEVER Bobby!


Fair fa yir honest sonsie face
Great chieftain o the Fodor race
Aboon them a ye tak yir place
an dae it a wi sic guid grace
wi a thae wirds an bawbees tae wirk oot
ye are a canny chiel withoot a doot.

Two superb entries. The penalty is hereby waived. In fact, the next delinquent Scottish entry will also be penalty free.

Confusing me with RhkKmk is however an unpardonable sin. No penalty attaches, but shame is visited upon your house.