Solo travel can be equal parts exhilarating and exhausting, here's how to deal.
These days, social media is flooded with travel bloggers and influencers lauding the empowerment and wonder that comes with solo travel.
Search #solotravel on Instagram and you’ll mostly find smiling women in bikinis “living their best life” or an aesthetic airport clip telling you to just go book that trip! I mean parts are really nice, like not needing to run tomorrow’s plan by anyone and the ability to go to the same restaurant three times in a row if your stomach desires.
Amazing, right? Sure, but do you know what these edited videos and rosy blog posts never show? The myriad ways that solo traveling can be extremely annoying.
I love solo travel. I just think it’s often over-glamorized, especially in this TikTok/clickbait internet age. I want travelers to go out and be excited and empowered on their solo trips. However, it’s also important to be prepared for what you consider “the worst” and the occasional downsides of traveling all by yourself. Prepare yourself for these common frustrations.
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Fending for Yourself in All Aspects
Okay, true, you don’t have to think about anyone else, but you also don’t have someone else thinking of you. Have you ever dragged your suitcase with one arm and held an umbrella and phone in the other while finding your way to a new place? It’s stressful, to say the least.
On a trip to Strasbourg last year I arrived via bus thanks to a train strike. Not a huge inconvenience, but as is often the case with buses, I wasn’t dropped off at a centrally-located station–and thunderstorms rolled in as soon as I disembarked.
My practical small duffle bag became much more annoying as I tried to stay dry by, you guessed it, holding an umbrella and bag in one hand and navigating with the other. To top it all off, I was staying in a part of the city I wasn’t familiar with in an apartment I’d never been to before.
INSIDER TIPLook up directions ahead of time so that if it’s a city you’re at least a bit familiar with you can head in the general direction without being glued to your phone (which might even be unsafe in some locations). And if it’s a new-to-you location, at least you know what exit to take in a station or what landmark to head towards. Oh, and always pack a bit lighter than you want to!
Using the Bathroom With All Your Stuff in Tow
This happens, without fail, on every solo trip I’ve taken. Since no one is with me to watch my stuff when nature calls, I often find myself crammed into a tiny train station bathroom with all my luggage.
Or, even worse, I frequently set myself up in a nice corner of the airport, complete with the holy trifecta of a charging port, table, and solitude, only to ultimately have to give up the amazing waiting spot. Why? Well, I swear my bladder can sense when I’m comfortable and immediately decide it needs a toilet.
INSIDER TIPYou can’t control your need for a restroom, but try and go before settling into a stopover place. Worst case, ask another solo traveler and ask (if you’re comfortable) if they could watch your stuff for a minute. Honestly, they’ll probably ask you to do the same once you return.
Eating Takeout in Your Hotel Room
One of the joys, and yes, things you must conquer as a solo traveler, is learning to dine on your own. It’s one of the “first steps” bloggers and travel writers often suggest you take to prepare for your big solo trip.
Back when I was a recent college grad solo traveling in Morocco, I was confused when a hotel receptionist was checking me in and would make a point to tell me that the guesthouse served breakfast and dinner. However, I quickly realized why. If I stayed in for dinner, it would be myself and another solo lady or two filling seats (due to the extra awareness required while visiting the country as a woman alone). Dinner solo out in Morocco is doable, however, the bonus of hotel reservations was that I usually made a new friend–and then we’d go out the next night together! Although plenty of times during that trip and others, I would just stay in with take-out and eat in a hotel bed, guilt-free.
INSIDER TIPTake precautions. If there aren’t restaurants a reasonable walking distance away, budget for Uber and taxi splurges. Alternatively, book accommodations with dinner options, should you be too tired come evening.
Hypervigilance Fatigue
I touched on this above, but the main reason behind staying in your hotel room for dinner is fear, which isn’t necessarily related to the social anxiety of dining alone. The unfortunate fact is, when you travel alone, particularly as a woman, safety is something you really need to consider. And all that being aware can be exhausting. But you can alleviate some of it.
For example, I try not to stare at Google Maps on my phone when routing somewhere new, but rather, get an idea of where I’m headed, and frequently check along the way. This ensures I’m fully aware of my surroundings and process the destination, which can come in handy later.
Additionally, I book centrally located accommodation so I don’t have to walk far in the evening and am always close to sites. And of course, I rarely fully relax, as I keep an eye or hand on possessions at all times, I don’t take secluded paths alone, and always proceed with caution.
All of this extra effort, on top of travel itself, can leave me knocked out at some point during a trip. I try to cut myself a break and allow for at least a half day at some point where I relax at the hotel so I don’t burn out before the trip is over.
INSIDER TIPDon’t let people on the internet, your parents, or anyone else terrify you with fear. Yes, traveling solo requires more caution, but there are ways to take precautions.
Second Language Exhaustion
Even if you’re fluent in the language of wherever you’re traveling, it can be straight-up exhausting to constantly translate. After years of living and traveling in French-speaking countries, I speak French and am very comfortable in the language. However, after days or even weeks of living in another language, without someone to help out or just converse with in English, my brain can quickly go haywire.
INSIDER TIPAlways schedule some downtime. Whether that’s a walk along the lake, reading (in your native language), or napping, it will give your mind an opportunity to rest! These are nice things to do in general whilst traveling solo (often more intense than as a pair or group), but they also help to give your brain a break.
Dinner Reservations Not Available for Parties of One
Trendy and less-hip restaurants alike often prioritize groups because large numbers equal more money spent. Groups can order multiple plates to share–sort of difficult when the only other person at your table is yourself.
Last fall I took an amazing trip to Brittany, part of France known for galettes, or savory crepes. THE place to go is Breizh Cafe, a French institution that started in Saint-Malo on the Breton coast. They grow their buckwheat (special whole-grain flour used in Breton galettes) and fresh ingredients in the countryside, delivered each day to the restaurant. I think I tried to make a reservation online at least four or five times during my trip, even emailing and calling. I never received a response, so on one of my last days, I just showed up at the start of the dinner service and was promptly seated at the bar with the other solo diners!
INSIDER TIPGo early and ask to be seated at the bar—often a good workaround when they claim not to have a table.
Sharing the View With Your Phone
Picture this: you’ve just hiked to a sweeping panorama of the lush rainforest, snowy alpine peaks, or the old town below. But, the only one you have to share it with is your phone. Sure you’ll post on socials once you’ve regained signal, but the real-time appreciation will have to be reserved for you and you alone.
I realized this while hiking in the French Alps over the winter. I’d long dreamed of visiting the region and enjoying long, restorative treks amongst pine trees and fresh mountain air. I even won the weather lottery and had clear visibility for most of my trip. And yes, the area around Grenoble is indeed full of some of the best views I’ve ever experienced. Yet, I marveled alone, with just the local cows and occasional pony for company. I love animals, but it doesn’t quite hit the same as smiling alongside a friend.
INSIDER TIPEmbrace the solitude and ability to hike (or partake in whatever activity you fancy) at your preferred pace. Then later, make all your friends jealous by posting the epic vistas on stories, accompanied by a video about how fulfilling your solo trip has been. I’m kidding about the last part. Unless that’s your thing!
Getting Sick
There is nothing worse than waking up somewhere foreign, where you may not speak the language, and realizing you don’t feel well. Or for those who have monthly cycles, that your period has arrived.
Last spring during a multi-month trip through Europe, I woke up one morning in a remote Bavarian town to find my period had arrived! Cue momentary panic while I looked up the nearest shop and Google translated “tampon” into German. It was fine, but not what I wanted to do that morning amongst cramps and fatigue.