9 Common Mistakes People Make When Planning Their Honeymoon

Stacking two big life events (marriage and honeymoon) back-to-back means there’s no downtime to relax and chill in between. Would you rather start your honeymoon refreshed or exhausted? Hopping in the car or onto a plane the day after saying “I do” almost seems retro now. Both people in a partnership likely hold down jobs and need to determine when the best time is to take days off. Plus, the honeymoon travel template is no longer limited to Hawaii, Florida, or Vegas–there are six other continents to explore besides North America. It’s now totally cool to travel to big cities, not just beach resorts, on a honeymoon, and it’s also legit to do whatever you please, even if that means hanging with polar bears in Alaska.

It’s easy to get lost in the excitement of planning a trip, especially a honeymoon. After all, you are only going to have one. Live it up, right? But the reality is that you have your whole lives ahead of you to tour museums and attractions and be away from the hotel room from dusk to dawn. For your first trip as a married couple, set an intention to enjoy each other’s company first and foremost. That’s going to be easier to do while lingering over a meal than it is zipping through a museum an hour before it closes.

If you ask a couple who just got back from their honeymoon what they enjoyed the most about the trip, they are probably going to talk about the hotel or resort. That’s because they splurged—as they should. You are probably going to take tons of photos of the room’s décor and amenities for the memories, so why not treat yourselves to an ocean-view room or a corner suite?

You’re a modern couple with all the household items you’re likely to need, which is why it’s okay to ask your wedding guests to provide cash for your honeymoon and not a blender. Most of your friends and family members would rather give you experiences anyway, so definitely create a honeymoon registry. Nearly every online registry, unless it’s through a store or retailer, has a tool for setting this up—so why not use it? If you’re feeling awkward about it, go ahead and add some traditional items alongside the honeymoon registry, like towels and bed linens, because you can never have too many sets.

Imagine booking a cruise for your honeymoon and vomiting the whole time due to rough waters or holing up in your hotel room instead of hiking near waterfalls in Hawaii. It’s as simple as a Google search or calling a hotel in your destination to ask a key question: When is the best time to visit? If you can’t swing a visit during that season, do a little digging. If it’s “the rainy season,” does that mean brief showers that turn into rainbows or storms that lead to mudslides? Not knowing the weather could lead to disappointments once you’re on the ground, but another casualty is that your trip could be postponed, delayed, or cancelled.

Again, this is your HONEYMOON, so don’t view it as a long weekend. There will be plenty of long-weekend trips in your future, to see family and friends, enjoy concerts, or check off other bucket-list destinations. Take at least seven nights for a proper honeymoon. It can take at least a few days to completely relax, and what is the point if the day you finally unwind is the same day you depart for home? If you need to delay the honeymoon for a year, that’s okay, too. The point is that you are not cutting any corners for the sake of sticking to a tighter travel timeline.

Even if you’re a private person, consider sharing with the front desk, your travel agent, the airline’s gate agent, or the restaurant maître d that it’s your honeymoon. Doing so might give you the best room, seat, or table. Everyone loves to see a couple in love, and that includes those who work in the hospitality business—they live for opportunities to make a trip seem even more special, particularly on a honeymoon. If you use an online reservation system for a restaurant, for example, there is a notes field where you can declare the special occasion. It’s not like you have to blurt it out upon arrival with the implication that, yes, you would enjoy receiving the best treatment possible.

Even if you haven’t seen your college BFF in five years, or your spouse suggests beers with a buddy during a long layover, say no. A honeymoon is for two people, period. Once you bring other people into your plans, there’s more of a chance things could go awry, whether it’s unexpected drama, having to divide your attention, or experiencing disappointment when things don’t go according to plan. On a honeymoon, you should start building your lives as a couple, which is much-needed, especially after managing family and friends’ expectations for the wedding. If you’re concerned about people feeling left out once they see your honeymoon photos, let them know in advance you won’t have time to get together—and remind them it’s your honeymoon.

This is not the same as being cheap. It’s about deciding ahead of time, early in the planning stages for your honeymoon, how much you can realistically spend. Starting your marriage with major debt is a no-no and could lead to fewer date nights, arguments about money, and other stress that will make your first year together feel like anything but a honeymoon. Keep those honeymoon vibes going by ensuring you’re on the same page with how much you want to spend on the first major trip you take together as spouses.