Where should i live?
 

I need a change and could use some advice or suggestions on where to live.

I'm 30, single and, while not a huge party girl, I do like to go out on occasion.

I'd prefer the West Coast (ideally, Calif, though Nevada or Washington might be a possibility). I like visiting Los Angeles, but don't think i want to live there.

Grew up in Orange County, but have lived away since college and have an image of OC as a place for families only.

I'm not sure i can afford San Francisco on the salary i'll be making (5 years experience in public relations).

I was in Palm Springs recently and loved the vibe, but am concerned about the 100+ weather and if there are enough young people.

I know i'm picky, but i've spent a few years living in a region that i don't care for and I really want to live somewhere that i love.

Thanks for any help!

I think you have CA fairly well assessed. Where do you live now? :?

A humid, nasty and culturally-devoid state on the east coast. And that's as specific as i'm getting for fear of offending anyone.

I haven't traveled around California in years - other than visiting my family in OC or friends for lunch in LA. But it's a massive state. There has to be somewhere perfect, right?

OK..let's recap what you have told us that we can really "go on" OK?

30 and single and like to go out on occasion (unfortunately you don't tell us what you like to "go out" to...)

Prefer the West coast but not LA or SFO and California is ideal

Forget Orange County rergardless of what it might really be like now

SFO is too expensive so I guess we can include Carmel, Monterey, Santa Barbara, too

Palm Springs is probably too hot and not enough young STRAIGHT people

We have no idea <b>exactly</b> where you live now so whatever we recommend which might end up being just LIKE where you live now means we are in the dark on that score. Go ahead, OFFEND somebody since you are leaving town anyway!!!

RESULTS: move to San Diego or at least consider it

Back over to you, Inso

Frankie, no I don't unless it is warranted and in this case it very much IS...because there are a LOT of gay YOUNG people in Palm Springs or didn;t you notice that as you spent your time there gambling?

And, unlike some, I assume this young woman is not gay.

dukey, my apologies. I triple reread your post afterwards and decided mine was uncalled for so I deleted it.

okay...

I don't want to list the city i'm living now, but it's in NJ.

The only city i don't want to live is LA - I was strictly listing my concerns about the other places. Feel free to rebut them!

As for gay culture - I'm straight but my best friend is a gay man and I could care less if there's a vibrant gay scene as long as there's a good straight one too.

And I didn't even know that Palm Springs was a &quot;gay&quot; town until Dukey mentioned the lack of straight people. Sorry, I truly didn't mean to offend anyone!

So how about I rephrase my question this way: What city or towns would you suggest that a 30-year-old single, straight woman who doesn't care for Los Angeles consider moving to?

I'm sure you've thought of this, but what about Seattle? Being that you're a CA native, the rain might kill you, but it's a cool city...

san diego, portland, seattle

Oh, move across the Hudson and have done with it. New York is the whole point of being in the mid-Atlantic area. As a world -- maybe <i>the</i> world -- capital it has the most to offer of any city in North America. Abandon these foolish dreams of lotus eating in California. Jump into the maelstrom. Perhaps you can swim.

OK so what don't you like about LA? Listing actual items would help people to help you. From your original posting, it sounds like you like the idead of SF, just not the $$$$ to live there. Is that correct or do I assume too much? And by SF, do you mean SF proper or the entire surrounding areas (Marin, Berkeley, Silicon Valley, etc)?

Do you plan to stay in the PR field? What about exploring Santa Barbara, San Luis Obispo, Tahoe, etc. Sounds like you need to take a trip.

Or Sacramento? I keep reading that it's far less stuffy than it used to be.

First of all, thank you to everyone who has responded!

Love the rain, so Seattle is a possibility. How is the cost-of-living there though? Is it inflated from the tech people?

As for New York, it holds no appeal. I like visiting, but wouldn't want to live there.

I don't like the smog or the traffic in LA. I know there's traffic everywhere, but something about being stuck on the 5 or the 405 just irritates me to no end.

As for San Fran - I love being in downtowns, but I also love having access to my car. And, quite honestly, I don't think I could afford to live in the parts that would appeal to me.

Are there any semi-cosmopolitan areas within hour or two of San Fran?

Has anyone visited Melbourne, Australia? It's a small downtown with many distinct neighborhoods that spread out from city center. Yet, it never feels over-crowded or dirty.

Since moving to Australia isn't an option, does anyone know if any cities in California that have a similar feel?

thanks again!

SacTown is a dump, &amp; if she thinks NJ is humid, you can rule out the rest of the SE US. Sounds like she likes SAn Fran but can't afford it (?). I'll throw Denver in the mix &amp; though Seattle has been mentioned, add on Vancouver.

I vote for San Diego! I have one friend (in her mid-20s) who just moved there and LOVES it and another who moved from there to PA and is moving back in a few months. Both say it's got perfect weather, a great vibe and a reasonable cost of living.

seattle... (from a california native)

you can't afford san francisco

Portland.

I second the vote for Sacramento. It is a great little city. Lots to do and close to much more.

If you're priced out of SF, you're priced out of most of the bay area. You could try Sonoma county, but it's going up and you'll most likely have to commute.

Sacramento isn't that horrid, but it is hot in the summer. The best thing about Sac is that you're a couple hours from the ocean, the city (SF) and the mountains.

My suggestion would be to check for offerings in your field around the state (and Nevada and Washington) and see where those positions are. Then you can work out in an ever-widening circle to see what towns are options within a commuting distance. Then you can narrow those down to what you'd like.

I suggest that mostly because if you randomly choose a great affordable town to live in, you may find that you'll have to commute 2+ hours each way to a job. I've known too many folks who have done that out here and hated it - ended up leaving their field or moving back from where they came from.

I enjoyed reading Dukeys explanation so much I wanted to jump on the bandwagon and say Seattle or SanDiego. Both have great scenes right now, the former being way more expensive.

But then I read Pausanias explanation and voted for NYC!!

Final vote, though: Portland, Or. That is a very happening place to be! I would live there if I could. Very Green, very rainy. Gorgeous gardens. Very hip to the new idea of healthy eating/living.

Frankie, do tell us just how you managed to &quot;delete&quot; your own post?

Dukey, see your delete post.

i live in san diego and think it would be a great choice for a young woman. we have the beach, mountains, close to LA for concerts, night life, etc.
However, I love Portland and fly there to visit family as often as i can.
Portland is affordable, it's eco-friendly...

findyourspot.com is an interesting website that asks a lot of questions and then computes a bunch of places that match your criteria. Asks obvious questions and some not-so-routine ones as well. We are not planning to move in near future but found it fun to see what came up on our lists.

cool website,

My #1 was Williamsport, MA

You can afford to live in the Bay area. My daughter (an AA) rented an apartment in SF's Sunset District, within three blocks from Ocean Beach, for $900. She has moved to an area of Oakland near College Ave (south of Berkeley) which is also affordable. My niece (two years out of College) found a place near the Castro she and her boyfriend could afford.
It's possible to live here! I've lived on both the East and West Coasts and I'd suggest you pack your things and move out here ASAP!

I second Marinette's post. I've lived in SF for almost 6 years, and while I don't rake in the dough, I can definitely afford to live here in a decent 2 bedroom (shared) near the park, go out at to restaurants, baseball games, and such, AND pay off my student loans. With 5 years of PR experience, you should definitely be able to afford San Francisco!

I don't think you should move anywhere until you do some research on your own, such as temperature year long, costs, activities. You could move to one poster's suggestion , get there, hate it and blame us.

I don't live there but I second the poster who suggested Denver. My friend moved there from NYC and she'll never look back. LOVES IT. It's extremely affordable, lots of good restaurants, good singles scene (not like NYC but there are a LOT of NYC expats!) and near the mountains for heaps of outdoor activities. If I didn't already live in NYC I'd move there.

I have been to Melbourne and I would say Chicago reminds me of that city. I lived in Chicago for 8 years and absolutely think it's the greatest city in the US. However, doesn't sound like it's really up your alley, esp with the winters but they do make you tougher!

Good luck! Never been to the NW of US so can't comment on Seattle or Portland. What about San Jose/Silicon Valley? Again, don't know much about it except I just read an article about how it's booming with MEN. SINGLE MEN.

Wow! Thanks for all the responses!

Northern California and Portland are both sounding more and more intriguing.

Are there any medium-sized cities outside of San Fran that have young people? Monterey or somewhere in Marin County maybe?

And I'm pretty free on where I go as i'm planning on leaving my current job and finding a new one.

Thanks again

Monterey and Marin County are more family oriented. Maybe somewhere on the Pennisula like Foster City or Palo Alto would suit you? They're not going to be any cheaper than SF though.

But i'm really not a fan of the parts i could afford in SF.

I've never heard of Foster City and will definitely look into it. Thanks!

I was just in Portland, and I agree it would be a great option to check out.

From my experience, Foster City tends to be more families and such. You could check out some areas in the East Bay, such as Berkeley and parts of Oakland (the Rockridge area is fun). There are many areas of SF that are young, hip, and affordable, like Duboce Triangle, Noe Valley, the Panhandle, the Haight, the Inner Richmond and Inner Sunset areas, Twin Peak, Golden Gate Heights, Bernal Heights, the Mission, Alamo Square/NOPA, Glen Park (which is very up and coming), and South Beach.

Marin County is not particularly family oriented (the south part, that is) but it is incredibly expensive.

I'm thinking Portland. The better the weather, the more expensive the rent. Stick with the Pacific Northwest if you can handle the rain and gloom.

I agree with the suggestions for Denver and Chicago - I know people who live in both places who LOVE it. They are convenient and desirable places for friends to come visit and offer every modern convenience plus 4-season outdoor activities should you wish to partake.

For a smaller city - I totally recommend Kansas City, Missouri in the heart of the country. I moved there when I was 29 and stayed for 10 years. It is a regional center and booming so getting a job wouldn't be an issue. Housing is very reasonable so you could live in a new 4 BR house in the burbs, or a trendy loft condo downtown or midtown, or a craftman bungalow near one of the first outdoor shopping areas in the country, the Country Club Plaza.

The 30-something scene really is vibrant with diverse interests and everyone so friendly that one can't help but make tons of friends and have plenty to do. Heck, you could meet your future husband there like I did!!!

A midsize city can be a refreshing break!

Sorry to drop by but there seems to be folks with pretty good knowledge of the L.A. area on that thread.

I'm heading to L.A. for work in July and I will have 3 days to spare. I would like to get the most out of it. Any help would be appreciated, see thread: http://www.fodors.com/forums/threads...p;tid=35011201

the west coast is so overrated. move to philadelphia that suppose to be a pretty cool city. or chicago, thats a great city. what do you want out of a place, weather, people, job, diversity, etc. figure out what you want then go from there. i live in the west coast now, originally from the midwest. the only good thing over here on the west coast is the weather othewise its overrated and too expensive, def not the place for me.

I've not lived there nor am I gay but I would LOVE to live in Palm Springs.

If I had to move inland, it would be the one place I would happily move.

Love the shopping, dining, attractions, geography, landscape and would KILL to own one of those fabulous mid century moderns!

although this thread was started back in late may, it seems to have been recently reactivated. so, ill add in my input.

first off, after reading everything inso is looking for, it amazes me that some peeps are suggesting such far off places as seattle and portland. those peeps didnt read her inquiry well enough.

ok, so shes single, 30, likes to go out on occasion, prefers west coast. likes visiting l.a., has perception of o.c. being family oriented, loves palm springs vibe, and overall seems somewhat price conscious.

the logical suggestion would either be san diego, or a smaller community that is relatively inexpensive to reside in, but still is within a reasonable radius of the locales she expressed an interest in visiting semi-frequently.