Jayne, what a hoot! Loved that story!

La, Jayne, those words, I can hear them now..you're marrying a Yankee?
lol

I loved that story!! I hear great stories like that from my mom about the first time my devout catholic grandparents meeting my jewish father. He was not even involved in the faith and did not keep a kosher lifestyle, but they had a fit anyway..and even more so when 3 months later my mom said they were getting married and she was preganat with me....My gramdma still sometimes refers to my dad as the "bull-headed jew"...lol

maybe i shouldn't have posted this, for fear of being called a troll again :)

I will keep everyone updated with my move and how i am adjusting to the south.

I moved to south Ga 4 years ago from the Midwest, so to answer your questions-- Yes southeners are friendly and nice, but more superficially. I like knowing where I stand with people (good and bad), in my experience southeners would just rather say something nice like than tell you what they may really think if its not a positive.

And it is true what other posters are saying about the civil war. Although, I have often heard it referred to as "The War of Northern Aggression."

Charleston is a beatiful city with lots to do. Southern women dress up alot to just go out and about, that was new to me. I guess I am just a plain ole farm girl.

It is nice that no one is in a hurry much, unless you are trying to get someone to help you with things like house repairs.

My husband from PA took a job here so I guess I am might as well grin a bear it, I am here for good!

You will love Charleston, good pick!

I'm risking it by adding this story but here goes. I've been married 25 years to a Yankee. Yes, I confess! When he told his PA parents & grandparents about me I don't know what floored them the most-
a) I was from the South or
b) I was Baptist.
They were Northern & Catholic so you can see that I was really foreign to them. Anyway... we go to visit them (from the south) & he tells me that his father has threatened to meet us at the airport dressed like an Amish farmer. So I say "not to worry" I'll just dress like a Hari Khrisna ( no offense to any here but remember they were everywhere in the late 70s) & really give them something to moan about. That was the end of that! The next culture clash came about 1987 when we had been married 8 years. Brother-in-law was getting married so they wanted a family picture taken a few days before. Mother-in-law about had a fit because I wore a nice sweater & dress pants. She actually hissed to the photographer to "put her in the back...she's wearing SLACKS!!" Hey, where I come from that was dressed up! Guess it really hit home that my southern family would never have embarrassed anyone like that. We'd at least wait til they cleared the driveway to start clucking!!

Welcome to the crazy world of the South. Rent a bunch of movies like "Steel Magnolias" & "Ya-Ya Sisterhood" to get a real feel for us.

Jayne, that's really funny.

You know, I really love Charleston (I loved it more before it picked up its pace in the past 15 years) -- but one thing really bothers me. Those mammy dolls and jocky statues they sell. They are everywhere from the 7-11 to the corner store. Kind of makes one think that they like that kind of stuff in Charleston. It's almost to South Carolina what the orange is to Florida.

Florida is and isn't the South. Southerners don't consider it the South because it's so different historically and culturally, but despite the difference there's plenty of yahoos down here to keep the image alive.

Yahooooooooooooooooooooo!

whats a mammy doll?

Oh, girl. You're in for some big surprises.

A small statue of Aunt Jemima.

What's a mammy doll??? Yikes-a-rama kiddo. Good thing you've got some well informed folks here to give you a Southern 101 tutuorial. Keep your game face on and you'll do just fine.

lol i do have alot to learn, at least I know who anut Jemima is!

ssi1-I believe you are correct about that Southern trait! We don't like to hurt feelings.

Do a search here for the "bless your heart" discussion--you'll LOL.

Benj,

I forgot to comment on your slacks faux paux. I too was raised as a Southern Baptist (my mom gave in on that one too--she was raised is the Episcopal Church).

When I was in college this boy finally asked me out after weeks of flirting. He invited to his church's revival (should have been my first clue). Of course as all college girls do, I agonized over what to wear and my roommates and I finally settled on a consertive blouse and plants. When he picked me up he looked horrified--pants were a no-no at his church. Of course since I only did my laundry once a month it threw me in to a tailspin. I made us 30 minutes late to church (which was Primitive Baptist) and it was THE longest date of my life, but damn he was cute.

By the way, my live mammy's name was Levita!

I love these stories, they're great. I must have been "Southern" in my other life (of course being hispanic it might be a stretch)I love sweettea, Southern Living magazine, southern cooking (not grits) and Elvis. Is Texas considered being "Southern?" Aunt Jemima has changed over the years, I liked the "old" picture better.What an adventure for you amatters!

Oh Jayne! That was precious :D

It reminds me of when I took my (now husband) to meet my relatives at our annual family reunion (brave man!).

He had only met my immediate family up until then, and there were about 100 aunts, uncles and cousins (and various other permutations of relativeness) sitting under old oak trees and chatting while the tables were laden with food. My Dad is one of 21 kids from two wives, so I have LOTS of kinfolk.

(NOT concurrently two wives of course. What a scandal THAT would be! My Grandpa's favorite saying regarding his propensity for progeny? "And not an idiot or a cripple in the bunch!")

As soon as hubby-to-be and I got out of our vehicle, every head swiveled our way in unison, and Aunt Ella - about 150 years old at the time - trumpteted in what she probably thought was a stage whisper, "is that Nancy with an Eye-tahl-yun?"

Point is, that ANY permutation away from the Southern "norm" is going to be the basis for a discussion, and it doesn't always mean that the person is narrow-minded, but I'm sure that on occasion it does. I said to my husband - who is Scottish btw - "And on that note, a big welcome to my family!"

From the world according to GoTravel:

Eastern States: Kentucky, Virginia, parts of West Virginia, Maryland.

Southern States: parts of Kentucky, Virginia, North Carolina, Tennessee, Arkansas, parts of Oklahoma, parts of Texas.

Deep South: SC, Georgia, Alabama, parts of Texas, Miss, LA, Rural parts of Florida.

States with none of the South: Parts of Texas, Parts of Virgina, Most of Florida.

This discussion is fun... I am even getting used to scrolling down a million miles to the next post! My neighbor with 5 kids came straight from Queens NY. She had her baby here in richmond. Well, while taking in one of the historical sites, there happened to be a Daughters of the Confederecy meeting. One of the ladies asked where they were from and the little one replied, " I was born here in Richmond VA." They then ushered in the family and remarked how nice it was to have a true southern family visiting... Needless to say when mom opened her mouth Flushing Queens just poured out... ha ha. The scene must have been something!

tanks go travel, I now realize that I am moving to the Deep south (i have never heard this term before)

AnnaR--too funny--how in the world did she take a Scotsman for an Italian (unless she really was 150!). My husband's parents are each one of eight and come from the same small town in Maine. They're divorced, but both sides still participate in the family reunions. We've been to one and I felt like a fish out of water.

Go Travel: minor correction to your geographical observations! Not at all true that practically none of FL is considered Southern and rural FL is considered deep South.

The geographical dividing line is where sweet tea appears on most menus-lol--which is once you get north of Tampa where the southern roots are stronger. Some examples of "Southern" FL towns that are not rural are Ocala,Lakeland, Plant City, Lake City, Live Oak, and Marianna.

There's a good split between Southeners from north and east of FL and what are called Florida Southerners. Florida Southerners are those born and raised here which does encompass a lot of rural FL, but they don't consider themselves from the deep South because FL is such a melting pot. I was born in GA, practically on the FL line and moved south of Tampa when I was one, so technically that makes me from the deep South--I would not be considered a FL Southener unless I had grown up in one of the above or a rural area(I'm not kidding; people actually do distinguish).

the trem deep south makes my move alot more scarier :)

Also what are some colleges in the charlestona area? I am comsidering working on my masters. Thanks :)

Charleston is not the 'Deep South.' I hope we haven't scared you about your move.

Well, the Citadel is in Charleston and now accepts women, but I don't think they have a graduate school. Try College of Charleston or Charleston Southern. There is also xxx school that I'm blanking on right now.

Sinehat can do a better job explaining this but back where there was slavery one way to scare the slave was to threaten them to be 'sold south'. It meant the end of a 'better' life where they were and might end up picking cotton in Mississippi. Those are the areas I think of when I here the term 'deep south.

ncgirl, Charleston isn't the deep south?

amatters, College of Charleston is a wonderful school. What subject for your Masters?

Go Travel,

"Deep South" is more a matter of customs than geography!

amatters,
Referring to your earlier post, my best friend of 20 years is an Italian Catholic "girl"!

"might end up picking cotton in Mississippi"
Along that note, my soft spoken Grandmother, known to us as Nannie, lived in the small town of Port Gibson, Mississippi all until she was almost 80. Which, btw, was the town in which General Grant stood on the house in which my Mother was raised and announced, "This town is too beautiful to burn"
Anyway, way back when, my Grandmother was turning to pull into her driveway when she ended up nicking another car going the opposite way. She stops for second, then goes to the end of her driveway, into the garage, gets out and goes inside.
Eventually the law comes and knocks on her door. The officer knows Nannie, and says, Mzz. Crisler, may I talk to you about the little accident you had? My Nannie's response was, "I don't talk about such things. You'll need to find my son and talk to him about it." And with that, she went back inside and the office went and found my Uncle to discuss it with him.

my masters would be in criminal justice.

thats a cute story about the grandmother, i currently live with my papaw, he is 83 has no idea how to cook, do laundry or pays bills, my grandmother took care of all of that and when she died he was basically helpless, (He just recently learned how to use a coffee pot) Which leads me to my next question, do southerners typically view a women's place as "in the home" and is it expected that women know how to cook, because if thats the case I will never be married ;) I am just asking becasue i the south seems to be a very traditional place.

hibiscushouse reminds me of "Driving Miss Daisy."

Amatters,
I am from the south and have lived in Charleston for a while during college. (College of Charleston). It's a great city especially if you are young. For some of the older residents it can be a little snooty... "OLD MONEY... AND ONLY OLD MONEY MATTERS" if you catch my drift. There are great restaurants, tons of bars, and great shopping!
As far as racial issues and civil war and all of that. It's really not an issue. I have plenty of friends that are different races and it's no big deal. Just stick with the educated people and you wont have a problem. The south still has ignorant red necks that believe in succession and all other kinds of crazy notions about women rights, african americans, and confederate flags. Most of the larger cities, like Charleston do have plenty of well educated and diverse people.
As far as your boyfriend being in PA for a while, I am sorry. My husband (then boyfriend) was in Erie, PA while I was in SC and it was tough. Now, however there is Independence Air which has great rates and flied directly into Charleston and Pittsburgh. I think flights are about $129ish.
Best of luck with your move. I am sure that you will LOVE Charleston. I would move back there in a heartbeat if I could!

Thanks Jribgy,
The boyfriend in pa will be hard, i am glad that it worked out for you and your husband, it gives me hope. He goes to Penn State and has about 2 years left, o the other hand i will be at the beach and he will want to visit often, as will my family and friends.

I am really enjoying this thread!

My mother left Tennessee after college for other places not located in the south. She shed her accent quickly, as northerners often discount things people say with a southern accent. (My husband can also attest to this. He shed his Georgia accent quickly, also...And my father, who grew up in Brooklyn, shed that one quickly, too! -tg!)
Once, though, we were visiting my Mom's aunt, who lived in Memphis. My Mom hadn't seen her for years. The family waited in the car while she knocked at the door. Then we heard this familiar voice, but with a syrupy southern accent we had never heard, saying, "Why Aunt Effie! This is Betty Ann!" We were roaring in the car!

You've got me scratching the ole noggin' thinking how anyone could suggest any portion of FL, TX, OK, AK and other outlyers are remotely related to the South. No, there are no southern Floridians, lol, whatever that is. Those are all pesky yankees! And C'ston is not deep? ... that comes from drinking too much sweetened tea, w/o mint! LOL, goodness gracious!

Keep the north/south stories comming, they are GREAT!!!

Goodness gracious, my lil ole head is spinning with Blackties reference to Southern Florida being full of "pesky Yankees" !! That must be why there is such a thriving Cuban community in Miami..all those pesky Yankee Cubans! as well as the many Hollywood types who have their homes in Florida now..but those must be those pesky Californian Yankees.

I live in Florida and an area that is referred to as Southern Georgia, so I guess we cannot get any deeper :D

Formal attire--come on down and I'll introduce you to more Southern Floridians than you can count! I know about six little old ladies alone who'd love to whoop your butt for saying they aren't Southern for being born and raised in FL!

amatters-puleeze, a woman's place in the in the home? If some people still feel that way it's not limited to the South! Now, if you didn't already have a papaw I might think that you were starting to pull our leg!

hibiscushouse--I feel like I know a celebrity--cool story.

Sure , " a womans place "..ever hear of Steel Magnolias :)

Jayne, funny idea, a group of sweet Southern ladies, whopping Blackties butt LOL

ncgrrl, from what I understand, that is where the phrase, "sold down the river" came from. The idea was that slavery life in the deep south was more brutal than in the upper south. I have heard the same thing about using the threat of selling the slave to a slaveowner from farther south to keep a slave in line. Sad, huh?
amatters, if your masters is to be in criminal justice you may be moving to the right city. The chief of police is a guy named Ruben Greenberg(?) who is credited with turning the crime rates around in Charleston. He's been there maybe 10-12 years. I've heard him talk a couple of times and he has a very common sense approach to problem solving. Interesting man, if a bit controversial.
Perhaps it's not fair to define the south strickly in geographic terms. May be just an attitude. For instance, if you go into a restaurant for breakfast and your waitress walks up and asks "you want coffee, hon?" even though she has never seen you before,
and/or you answer, "yes, Ma'am" even though she is younger than you are.
Good chance you are in the south.

And that river would be the Mississippi River!

I do think amatters is pulling our leg, but this is still a great thread!

In my group of friends, many have transplanted to Florida years ago. From Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Texas, oh and Tampa too. Myself, I come from Mississippi born and bred parents, I was born in Louisiana, and moved to Clearwater 41 years ago. At least 1/3 of the people I know are Florida natives. Fortunately it affords me many wonderful stories of 'old Florida'. Soak it up like a sponge.
I debated asking, but figure I need to know at this point. We used to have a maid that would make us peanut butter, mayonnaise and sugar sandwiches. Try it before you knock it. Any of you fine Southern folk ever had one, or were we isolated in this delicacy?
Oh, and one more, it's praaawline, not prayline. That is if one knows what a praline is to begin with.
And amatters, if you have a pawpal (that's how we spell it), then you must sit down at your first Charleston bar and sip on a mint julep. Promise me that!

Is calling your grandfather a papaw a southern thing? I have him and a pappy, a grandma and a grammy.

Mint julep sounds yummy!

Oh hibiscushouse, I'd forgotten about some of those odd sandwiches. When I was a little girl I thought it was so gross when my aunt ate a pineapple and mayonnaise sandwich every morning for breakfast. I still think it's a gross combination but it's still on the menu in a little diner in my dad's hometown.

My mama also put a saccharin tablet in EVERY single thing she cooked. About 10 years ago, within two years of each other my dad and my uncle BOTH developed a rare but curable form of bladder cancer. Weird.

We haven't heard from bonniebroad; she must be on vacation or she'd be right on this!