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-   -   Add To My Roadtrip Rules? (https://www.fodors.com/community/united-states/add-to-my-roadtrip-rules-528004/)

GoTravel May 10th, 2005 09:12 AM

Add To My Roadtrip Rules?
 
Having to lay down the law for my family for upcoming roadtrip. Have some rules and want to know if anyone could add any useful rules?

1.) Only three stops between Columbia and Miami, don't care how bad you have to 'go'.

2.) Don't care if you want something to drink. There are drinks in the cooler.

3.) Don't care that you haven't eaten since yesterday. There are sandwiches in the cooler.

4.) Tough if you don't like mayo.

5.) Ditto for mustard. Trade with your seatmate/brother/sister/parent/stranger sitting next to you.

6.) Stop complaining about the AC and put on a sweater. It is June in Florida for crissakes.

7.) Stop complaining that the AC isn't working. Take off your sweater. It is June in Florida for crissakes.

8.) No, we are not there yet.

9.) I still don't care if you have to 'go'. Use empty drink can from rule #2.

10.) Don't aggrivate 'me' the co-pilot. I am responsible for your fathers/son-in-laws/brother-in-laws/friends happiness and if I'm aggrivated, everyone is unhappy.

11.) You will play whatever car games I decide and will be happy and enjoy them.

seetheworld May 10th, 2005 09:20 AM

12. ABSOLUTELY no singing of "Ninety Nine Bottles of Beer on the Wall"!!!!!!

Marilyn May 10th, 2005 09:25 AM

I would change #10 to "If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."

makai1 May 10th, 2005 09:26 AM

GoTravel... or should we say, "GrrrrrrrrrrrTravel" :D

Have maps for everyone to follow along, that way when someone says, "where are we?", they can look it up for themselves. Good geography and map reading lessons involved as well! ;;)

BTW, thanks for the Black Mountain input on my Asheville thread!

utahtea May 10th, 2005 09:33 AM

GoTravel...remind me never to go on a car road trip with you!!!! LOL!

My only roadtrip rule is to go in a motorhome so you can avoid all your rules except #8 and #10.

With a motorhome I have a built in bathroom so I can go anytime I want with comfort. I have a built in refrigerator/freezer so we can even have icecream! All our groceries easy to get to so I can make the sandwiches any way you want them. I have easy access to warmer/cooler clothes and can change accordingly as we drive. I have even been know to curl up in a blanket. I have my lap top computer to work on or books to read but prefer to enjoy the scenery as we drive.

Utahtea

sunbabe May 10th, 2005 09:45 AM

Please add:


Do not touch each other! Stay within your 24 inches of seat space.

Do not look at each other!

radiofanatic May 10th, 2005 09:46 AM

are only men going? I don't think a drink can would work to well for a woman - you must not like your car much! :)

a couple of others:

1) I don't care if he/she is touching you. stay in your own space.

2) play "sugarbowl" - whomever is silent the longest wins.

3) I don't care if you don't like what I picked on the radio/cd player/tape recorder. I'm the driver and I get to pick.

4) Do not sing along with the song - I chose this song because I wanted to listen to the singer sing it - not you.

seetheworld May 10th, 2005 09:50 AM

Regarding games..."flipping the bird" and "mooning" is reserved for the driver and co-pilot only. Find another way to entertain yourselves!

rjw_lgb_ca May 10th, 2005 09:53 AM

Hi, Go! Your rules are good so far. I might add:

12. If I have to reach over the front seat because one of you is "touching" a sibling and making him or her shriek, I will rip off the offending toucher's limb and beat him or her with the wet end.

13. If W-CRAPPO ("All Billy Ray Cyrus! All the time!") is the only radio station coming in static-free between Podunk and East Toad Suck, we will listen to it and like it until we hit a town with more agreeable playlists. Complainers will be unpaid bellboys for the remainder of the trip. And don't you start whining about your missing arms from rule 12, mister/missie!!

14. Tough about passing that McDonald's. You didn't put in your Happy Meal order before we left-- don't come crying to me. Besides, what are YOU going to do with a Darth Vader action figure, Stumpy?!

15. Well, I'm sorry you've read all the books you brought. When we're at home I have to force you with threat of overwhelming nuclear force to read, and NOW you're complaining about being bored with your books?! Here! Have you ever read the Owner's Manual for the car?!... Have your brother/sister turn the pages, Stumpy.

A little violent, sure, but oh the mayhem of our road trips! I wish you the best in avoiding the mistakes of my family.

Enjoy.

snowrooster May 10th, 2005 09:55 AM

NO FARTING IN THE CAR!!

If you absolutely have to fart and can't hold back, at least roll down the window.

In college I went w/dh and two of his roomates (we planned the trip, they tagged along) to Key West non-stop from Ohio. One of them (who is now a big time lawyer) farted CONSTANTLY. We asked that he at least give us fair warning to roll down the windows and get some air flowing. Aaarrrgh!! I as thrilled when we dropped him off at the campground (ie: parking lot w/tents) and went off to our motel. :-)

seetheworld May 10th, 2005 09:55 AM

rjw: #15 has brought tears to my eyes, LOL!!! Very funny :D

GoTravel May 10th, 2005 10:11 AM

These are hysterical!

No paper or map games since they will take them from me to turn into weapons to use against me!

Meesthare May 10th, 2005 10:19 AM

After a rather eventful trip through the Maritime provinces with my kids (back when they were kids):
Do NOT barf in your brother's sneaker, even though by taking his shoes off he has provided you with a handy container.


SAnParis May 10th, 2005 10:55 AM

Based on the prior responses, I would require a stop at a Beer drive-thru or other appropriate venue that serves alcoholic beverages in every state entered. This way I don't have to resort to the next rule which is to tie the annoying co-pilot to the roof...Vodka will go well w/the complimentary OJ or Grapefruit juice you get when entering Fla. LOL.

radiofanatic May 10th, 2005 11:12 AM

two more from this end:

- re the farting - don't pretend it wasn't you - we all know it was you and you aren't hiding anything - be honest and as stated earlier, give fair warning, b/c if you don't, the world will know of your issue with farting

- no cell phone conversations in the car unless someone is dying. I don't need to hear your loud conversation to someone I don't know while I'm trying to concentrate. If you attempt to do so, I will turn up NPR so loud you would have been able to hear it back from where you came.

- yes, I know the drive is boring - I don't need to be consistently reminded by you that it's boring as I'm trying to keep my eyes open and stay awake driving.

- No arm movements to "ask" a truck driver to honk his horn for you. First, I do not need to be scared that I'm going to be run over by a truck while I'm driving and hear the honk. Second, one of these days, one of those truck drivers is going to mistake that arm movement for another and then we're all done for.

JJ5 May 10th, 2005 11:13 AM

sunbabe, the first thing I thought of was - "he's touching my arm, he's staring at me."

You forgot the biggest rule of all:

WINDOW ROTATION - I get the window now, you had it twice already. STRICT ROTATION.

And Go Travel, there is a great game where you do not need paper, pencil etc.
and it keeps them off each other for at least an hour or two.

You need to be the first one to see a sign with a place name etc.(YOU make the rules)with A, then B, then C. You go all the way through the alphabet.
No prizes or scores needed, finding the X & Z ones are always their own reward.

karens May 10th, 2005 11:15 AM

Sunbabe - I can't count how many times I've told my older son not to talk or even to LOOK at his brother! lol.

Based on past experiences, we've learned it's very helpful to have a map in the car (yes, we've forgotten maps). And in Florida this might not be as important, but in the non-populated west - make sure you fill the gas tank when you're in civilization. We've had anxious moments when the gas gauge was hovering on "E" when we were in the middle of nowhere!

A portable DVD player or in-car TV is the best invention in the WORLD for long car trips.

JJ5 May 10th, 2005 11:19 AM

Forgot to say, about this last game.

If you take the same route more than twice or thrice, be prepared for the ones who remember where the Q or Z signs were. First one who "reads" the sign correctly outloud is the criteria.

Always be prepared for those who are visually challenged saying it is "Not fair."

GoTravel May 10th, 2005 11:23 AM

You guys are awsome and Mr.GoTravel is howling while reading the responses and sends his thanks.

We will be in a 15 passenger van driving from Columbia, South Carolina (picking up stepchildren) to Miami, Florida via Interstate-26 (short time) and mostly I-95.

The youngest passenger is my soon to be 18 year old stepdaughter and the oldest my 69 year old mother.

JJ5 May 10th, 2005 11:25 AM

You think Go Travel is strict!

My rules include no tv, video etc., hand-held electronic games when there are people present to talk with. And no books or newspapers at meals for 2 or more. Made up stories or any music is ok, as long as one person does not duel with another over type.

Believe it or not this last ended up once with no radio at all. My daughter 30 plus could no longer put up with my guy's jazz station.


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