"She drives, dresses herself up to the nines every day, gets her hair and nails done every week, and goes to work every day as an interior decorator at a high-end furniture store, which also involves going to customers' homes as a consultalt."

If she does all that there is no reason she's not well enough to travel. The question is whether she wants to. Is she really interested in travel? If so, you might be on track thinking your sister and brother-in-law are discouraging her and I'm not sure how you can deal with that. Maybe show her some Grand Circle travel catalogues so she can see photos of people older than she is who are obviously having a good time.

As someone who's traveled with someone who has mobility AND health problems, let me tell you from experience. Go.

There are plenty of squares (and steps) in Rome where she can take a little breather if your sister needs a break from walking. Like in any large and well loved city, there are plenty of uneven sidewalks and roads, but not enough to be a hazard for someone with a cane (my mom sometimes needs a cane).

Now, my mom is spunky and adventurous despite her problems, and she loves getting on buses and trains, and the bus drivers and passengers have been accomodating (ok, the bus drivers not so much, but the passengers, completely).

I don't know what else to tell you to convince her that she won't be a burden to anyone. Sometimes, I have a hard enough time convincing my mom to take trips with me because she doesn't want to be a burden on me. But for me, it's really about spending the time together and experiencing new cities than about doing a whirlwind tour of some place.

Just accept that you can't see as much as you want as fast as you want, go with the flow of the moment, offer to sit down and take breaks (this is much better than having her ask for a break), be happy (you're in ROME!!!) and remember, you can always go back!

Oh, one more thing. Maybe I missed it in the thread, but does she have a cane? It might be better for her joint problems if she has something sturdier to balance on.

And to make getting on a plane easier once she gets to the airport, make sure you request wheelchair assistance when you book her ticket, and confirm prior to her flight. Believe me when I say this will make life easier for her.

Hi jgarvey, good luck in your goal to travel with your sister, but the information you've subsequently supplied makes me want to bet against it. Your sister turns out to be a high-end interior decorator, not someone who stayed sheltered all her life; I can't remember if you said she's self-employed, but in any event this is a competent person who solves difficult problems. I just doubt that looking at a Grand Circle brochure of older people having fun will be a deal-maker -- or letting her read all our earnest replies, or any of the other good recommendations.

She lets her husband treat her like a bird on a pillow? Her daughter you suspect doesn't want her to go because it'll ruin her good time? And you are afraid to talk to her? That's way TMI and not on topic with the original post of senior mobility issues.

Good luck, I hope you have a wonderful month in Rome, I envy you having that opportunity.

Parrot Pop walks with a cane because of a bad ankle...and he is 76.. what we have found is that when we get to the airport or land..we request a wheelchair or cart.. In the various ports we find that taking cabs for tours..btw I have a great guide in Rome if your interested...another alternative is to rent a wheel chair., We are planning an extensive cruise next December and although he will be able to do some walking a guide and a taxi will be available to him..

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Sorry I haven't responded to all of your recent helpful posts, but have been busy packing and getting ready to go to Tortola to spend some time with DH on the boat. Will be leaving in a couple of hours. And yes, I caved. We both decided that 7 weeks was too long.

BrendaStarr, thanks for that link about the scooter and also for letting me know that you can rent a wheelchair at some of the larger museums, especially the Vatican.

ParrotMom, I am encouraged to hear about how you and DH have worked things out so that you can still travel so successfuly together.

Fidel, I did not say that I was afraid to talk to her, just that I didn't want to hear a final refusal. I included those other details merely to indicate what I am up against here. She works part-time, mostly desk work lately, does have severe back and joint pain, and walking is painful and diffiicult for her. I just think that if she challenged herself a litte, she could handle this trip with my help. Sorry, didn't intend to mislead in my request for support.

Can't thank you all individually right now. Time is short and I have to be getting ready to leave. Thanks again.

My Mum visited Rome twice when she was younger and always wanted to return. I managed to take her there 2 years ago when she was 79 years! She also had a knee replacement and the same fears that she might be a burden. But we enjoyed it so much!

I also want to emphasise what others already said - take breaks often because she would most probably not tell when she is tired; avoid buses - the buses in Rome are very intimidating for an older person. Metro is anyway OUT.

What my Mum really enjoyed - apart from St Peters (I never realised how big the square was before I walked with her!) - was regular Gelato breaks! We had at least 2 a day - sat down and enjoyed our Gelato. I have the most beautiful photos to remind me of those "cool breaks" - it was hot when we were there!

Not to one up anyone right now, but right now, my mom, who walks with a cane, is resting up in our hotel room in El Califate, where she just endured 40+mph winds that nearly knocked her over (I caught her cane in mid flight). Rome is a picnic compared to this. But she's having fun right now and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

I guess it really will come down to what your sister wants to do, jgarvey. You certainly can't force her to go, but you also shouldn't let her not wanting to go ruin your good intentions.

Hope all works out for the best for you and your sister. I think she would have a blast in Rome, and you've received a lot of encouraging posts from people who have been in your sister's shoes.

Good luck!

mcnyc in El Califate