Go to http://www.molvania.com/

Its located in southeast Europe, between Legullible and Laclueless.

Zlkavszka Gardyloo

As far as I know, the Molvanîan Warthound is sadly now an endangered species, and you will have difficulty finding any for sale, even on the grey market. There are a couple of breeding pairs in the Vajana zoo, and the zookeeper, Zrki Wrcsanti is known to slip animals out the back door for the right price (US dollars only!).

I know that they are not comparable to the magnificent warthound, but did you consider importing either the Molvanîan Sneezing Hound or the Zuti herd dog? As you know, the latter are routinely slaughtered for their meat by the mountain shepherd-folk, and establishing the breed in the US might prevent it from going the way of the Warthound.

Wakuz Dro Brugka Spazibo!

For those who love cats, I saw photos of the elusive little Spritzlkat who although wild, takes to domesticating very easily.
With their tri-color fur and pink eyes, they are definitely adorable and no one can ignore their plaintive screeches when they want to eat.
I would definitely look into bringing back a breeding pair. Just be sure their cages are solid and have their own air supply, when they are worried, the emit an odour that might be offensive to most humans.
Glaadidah to you!!

BREAKING NEWS:

The Ryanair flights from Luton to Lutenblag West (which simply circled Luton airport, then put all passengers into the back of a 7 tonne minilorry for the short 3-day drive across Europe) have now been suspended because of typical nanny-state interference by the EU Directorate-General for Innovation Discouragement.

Flights now go to Lutenblag-Tirasopol (soon officially to be renamed Lutenblag South East), in not-quite neighbouring Transdniestr. Ryanair provide a convenient 37-hour connection to central Lutenblag using the new 56-stander, all-Molvanian, Vulkan buses (widely admired for their uncannily accurate resemblance to Fiat 500s)

Since Transdniestr voted against the Molvanian entry in the Eurovision Song Contest, border crossings have become slightly tricky, with all traffic originating from Transdniestr now required to pay €1000 per head (used notes only: no receipt available) on entry. Transdniestr imposes a matching fee for the return journey, but requires it to be paid in unused Russian roubles, the only currency accepted in Transdniestr.

In his press release about the new service, Ryanair chief Michael O'Leary said the company's pioneering of Tirasopol-Lutenblag South East was "a further step in the company's plan to transform the costs of European travel"

Is it true that you have to UNcover your arms and legs in Molvanian places of worship?

After receiving dishonourable discharge from the Societe des Aspirateurs, a vacuum cleaning regiment headquartered on the Rue Cler in Paris, I now wish to enlist my spouse in the Molvanian Foreign Legion. Please, I need the address of the recruiting office.

All of you silly people are just tourists, not travellers. I, on the other hand, bought the book in Britain before it was available in the US and rushed off to Molvania before it was overrun by the inevitable rush of American tourists in white sneakers. Thank goodness I got there early enough to absorb the genuine Molvanian feel and smell. From what I hear, Lutenblag is no longer what it was, since Rick Steves called it "the next Prague" and Dentists Without Borders sent over a shipment of drills and scrapers.

All of you are my heroes - my incredible, informative travel heroes.

Which one of you posed for the cover of the guide book?

what books can I read to prepare for my upcoming trip to Molvenia.

I plan to go to Lutenblag, spend some time hiking in the alps and the a side trip to laclueless in search of of my mising brain cells.

Balderdash ! Who cares about all that stuff? I just want to know where to shop and what to bring home.

Bob---
One of my good friends highly recommended Vripuff off the main square of Lutenblag. (Look for the statue of Commandant Klink and then walk about 15 steps. The door is poorly marked but is next to the donkey stalls.) Vripuff is one place with interesting native Molvanian crafts. I was told the salespeople are eager to help you and take care of the VAT but double check their math. Full blooded Molvanians only have 9 fingers so counting higher than that sometimes poses a problem.

Debbie

In the current edition of Molvania Through The Back Door (p.7), it advises that if you stay at the Four Seasons Lutenblag, you will build a cinderblock wall between yourself and the genuine culture you came to experience. Your $1 will only buy dentally-challenged smiles, but it will only be an illusion and not the real thing.
I just hope by the time I get to the Pensione Spazibo near the train station, I won't be seeing everyone else standing in the lobby with copies of the "Back Door", demanding their name-dropping discount.

Has anyone married a Molvanian sweatheart? If so, was it hard to get them past the animal control folks at the airport here in the USA? What shots and pest paperwork will they need?

Wow. I just got a great deal on a 4 night package in South Molvania's coastal paradise Dentrifica! Has anyone stayed at the Best Western (oh no, not the US chain, it's through that partnership with Novotel) Anyway, I get 4 nights for the price of 3 and tickets to the State Opera's production of Novocania. All this and free non-motorized water sports! I'm so pumped up! (It IS warm enough there in March, right?) Travelzoo comes through again! wheeeeeeeee!

how much do I tip the donkeys?

One carrot.

How much do you tip the donkeys? Depends how strong you feel and how steep a slope they're on.

Zlkavszka busted

I hate to break it to you, but you've been scammed! Molvanîa is a land-locked country, and the south is actually quite mountainous.

If you've been told that your resort is in the south, it's probably on Lake Debrizca, which is quite nice so long as you avoid the area wher tour buses dump their holding tanks.

As an alternative you might consider man-made Lake Skrotul in eastern Molvanîa where thousands of Molvanîans spend their holidays. You should be aware though that because of drought and uncontrolled irrigation practices, the lake level has dropped, so that the resort towns are now 3km from the water's edge.

If it's any consolation, you're not the first to fall for this particular scam. You should probably deal with a travel agent who specializes in travel to Molvanîa, who would be aware of this and many other common scams.

Wakuz Dro Brugka Spazibo!

Hi laverendrye
>I hate to break it to you, but you've been scammed! ...
If you've been told that your resort is in the south, it's probably on Lake Debrizca, which is quite nice so long as you avoid the area wher tour buses dump their holding tanks.<

We have reservations (paid for in advance in cash because we got a 25% discount) at the Hotel Krokystrokiskiaskya Notrilly. Is this in the area you are referring to?