Is it ok if we don't fit in when we go to Paris? (Fashion)
 

When we go to France in November, I started to think about what to pack. I don't do high fashion and I don't own a Hermes Scarf but I don't dress trashy but not very sophisticated in my daily life...

My husband and I are chubby and I certainly don't look french but I do speak and write it fluently with an Acadien accent...LOL

I wear sneakers when walking all day (like we will do in France) and smarter shoes for Dinner out...I wear jeans and beige pants, cotton shirts and carry a small backpack...I will not doubt look like a tourist with my camera out every 2 minutes to take another photos.

I see a lot of posts on what to wear to not look too touristy but I want to know why this is a BAD thing.

People will know right away that we are Canadian. We will be at all the touristy places...
What is the main reason to dress to fit in? Is it security from thieves? Is it so the French won't roll their eyes at our lax fashion sense? Should I really try to fit in more? Will it make the trip more enjoyable?
I have already taken Sweatshirt off my list and will go with sweater for warmth instead of comfy sweat...I don't ever do track pants so is jeans and cotton pants ok? I will give up my fleece jacket if I will stand out too much...but it is so warm.

Just open for info and a discussion...

By the way...we are Husband 36 and me 33...

Thanks

Hi bear,

>Should I really try to fit in more?

Of course. The fashion police will haul you away if you don't.

>I will give up my fleece jacket..

I don't think that Paris gets *that*cold in Nov.

Enjoy your visit.

((I))

Good manners count more than wardrobe or style. Greeting everyone from shopkeepers with a hello and goodbye in French can get you far.

Do you honestly think that anyone in Paris carries what you wear?

I don't understand the ?
"Do you honestly think that anyone in Paris carries what you wear?"

Are you asking me if I think te stores in France will carry the kind of clothes I wear at home? or are you asking me if I think people will care what I wear?

Short answer: Yes.

A sweater is more versatile and practical than a sweatshirt for travel anyway. Most practical of all: cashmere, because it's exceptionally warm for the weight and looks good.

Scarves do not have to be Hermes or any other designer to make you look more dressed up and pulled together. I always take a few -- it's nice to have the variety when living with a limited wardrobe, and they weigh nothing and take up no space at all.

I suggest taking a pair of black jeans. All the comfort and casualness of denim, but you can get away with wearing them in the evening with a nicer shirt or sweater, and a nicer pair of shoes than your sneakers.

If you love your fleece, take it. I wouldn't, but only because it's bulky and again, not versatile enough. You wouldn't want to wear it to a nicer restaurant. On the other hand, two years ago we were in England in May and it was cold and rainy for 18 days straight. I ended up buying a cheap fleece jacket at a street market and was very happy (and warm) to have it.

Ira's first comment is correct. The fashion police will haul you away. ;) Of course not!

From what you describe as being your normal dress, that's what you should wear in France.

That's really nice that you know to speak fluent French! Have a nice trip.

"My husband and I are chubby and I certainly don't look french but I do speak and write it fluently with an Acadien accent...LOL'

I thought only Americans were chubby?

Chubby is such a dismissive word. I prefer "big-boned" or "calorie challenged" for myself.

And seriously, getting the french to roll thier dark, swarmy eyes is great fun and not very hard. And don't be too quick to disgard the track pants, they can come in handy when being chased by the fashion police! As for the sweatshirt, well, that's your call, but I think a nice orange one with a "Euro-trash Spoken Here" logo might work for some people.

There is such a variety of tourists in Paris that no one is going to notice which category you fit into--don't worry about it. But for November, take a raincoat, waterproof shoes or boots, and a sturdy umbrella.

I was in Paris in October 2003, and it was VERY cold that week (freezing at night and maybe 35-40F in the day). I wore every layer I had. I took a number of solid colored shirts, varying long and short and 3/4 sleeves, a single gray wool cardigan sweater that went with all of my tops. I also took jeans, a pair of khakis and a pair of black slacks. I also took a fleece jacket and a Gore-Tex rain jacket.

We're going back this September and will probably pack similarly, only take a bit more basic black since it tends not to stand out as much. Instead of my Gore-Tex, I will take my black trench instead just because it can be dressed up more and does fit in a bit better.

There's a lot of debate on this board about trying to fit in vs. not...in my humble opinion, it's more important to be comfortable both physically and with how you feel about what you're wearing and not worry too much about those around you. Most people will peg you for a tourist (and you are, so don't sweat it) and in all reality, if you're wearing "fashionable" shoes in the Louvre but miserable all day, you'll see less than if you are in comfy walking shoes, even if they are the dreaded white sneakers that so many of us find comfortable.

For me, I prefer only to try and fit in more from a "long shot" point of view --for thieves and pickpockets, I'd rather not have a beacon on my head that says "AMERICAN!" I found my NorthFace jacket was very obvious, not just because of the brand but because it was a very light color, and I found most Parisians wear a lot of black, particularly in the fall/winter months, just like us in the States.

Also, I bought a pair of black Merrells, (pardon the spelling on that) that while not very attractive compared to the super-pointy shoes the French women wore in abundance, they were very comfy for walking a lot and not as loud as a pair of sneakers. Not sure what I'm going to take this time, but the Merrells haven't been ruled out.

Have fun.

Julie

Well, you won't be invited to the super exclusive cocktail parties that the Parisians hold for properly (and trendy) dressed visiting tourists - but other than that you should be okay.

Be prepared for anything weather-wise. It was BITTERLY cold when we were in Paris early last December. I was prepared and regretted it.

Sometimes I just take two pairs of black jeans and just wear those with different sweaters if we're not planning a fancy dinner.

Don't worry about your clothing...just be comfortable. You see everything in Paris!

Judy

Yes, let us all praise mediocrity and give applause to slobs. Here is your prize for being average ~(::)8> .

Stupid smiley faces.

Should be ~(##)8>

ThinGorjus (ARE YOU REALLY?) -- I would hope you'd also be triply lucky and have something less troll-like to post.

LOL, jules, after you have been here for a while,( and have read enough of Johns contributions) you will see that this is just JohnG..nothing to take personally and certainly not a Troll.
And Of Course, he is really!! :)

Hi Photobear

I like how you are really down to earth and comfortable with yourself. I applaud your joie de vivre!

Don't worry about what to wear or if you look too touristy - be yourself.

The fact you can speak the language is a huge plus.

Have a wonderful trip.

Two separate issues:

Will the fashion police haul you away? No - you do not have to wear Armani and Prada - and if you don;t mind looking like a tourist - no one else will care either. But - agree that fleece will not likely be necessary - Paris is rarely that cold in Nov. And (I - and many others) feel that super casual - sweatshirts, jeans and super huge white sneakers are just not very appropriate for adults in a world capitol (but OK for the mall). Certainly khakis and sweaters will be fine - and you don;t need a scarf if you don;t want one.

The second issue is respect for other people's culture. This applies only to the people who seem to want to wear shorts and bosom/midriff baring tees into churches etc in areas where this is considered a sign of disresprect. IMHO - if they can;t follow the rules to that extent they shouldn;t go.

(There was one couple from FL who couldn;t seem to get the concept that although everyone there may wear shorts, tees and sandals everywhere the rest of the world is not the same. They specifically asked for advice on what to wear - and then fought with everyone who gave it to them. At the end they revealed they would be in Venice, etc in winter. I hope they froze their stupid little heinies off.)

>> And (I - and many others) feel that super casual - sweatshirts, jeans and super huge white sneakers are just not very appropriate for adults in a world capitol <<

Nothing personal, nytraveler, but we have discussed this topic too much?

WHO CARES!?!?!?!?

After 9/11 and the resulting drop in tourism, friends who were in Paris said EVERYONE - taxi drivers, hotel staff, wait staff, boutique staff thanked Americans for coming - AND FOR SPENDING OUR $$$ THERE.

Do we HONESTLY think anyone in Paris cares what tourists wear?

Do you (not nytraveler, but Fodorites in general) CARE what tourist in your towns wear?

If so, perhaps we are too shallow or too limited in scope.

I wore "appropriate" clothing in Paris last year, but wore JEANS, SWEATSHIRT, BALL CAP AND WHITE TENNIES for a bike trip to Giverney - and missed my train. I spent the day sight-seeing Paris in that (gasp!) attire.

I can promise you I did not perceive any differences from others from the days I wore the appropriate black EU tourist uniform.

WHO ARE WE TRYING TO "FIT IN" WITH ANYWAY?!?!?

When I'm on vacation in the US, I'm not trying to fit with the people NOT of vacation living their normal lives.

Is anyone else just over this topic!

I know, I know...just stop reading these threads.

I hear you Starrsville!!! I love seeing tourist, I so enjoy their enjoyment of the area that I live in. Unless they are gross I do not even notice what they wear. And since some residents do not look like fashionable either who cares? I do feel bad for tourist in SF when they are freezing to death because they are in shorts and Tshirts etc., obviously thinking that all of California is beach type weather. And of course our beaches have cold weather also.

I do notice that when the Europeans are in SF they seem to be dressed more appropriately then say some travellers from other parts of the US. But again, who cares? It always makes me smile to see visitors enjoying themselves, talking to their spouse about this site or that site, pointing out various things to their children.

The "what do I wear" situation has gotten pathetic IMHO. It is a wonder some people even travel anymore with all the "rules and regulations" that appear here on Fodors. No one can look like a resident of another country when they are travelling. And so what? Tourist bureaus spend a lot of money to encourage people to visit their area. That is what they are interested in. Tourist money!
Wear clothes appropriate for the weather and you will feel more comfortable.
Look and act like a lady or a gentleman and you will be respected anywhere. That has nothing to do with putting on a fashion show. But if you want to that if fine of course. But if not, please do not worry about it.

Sorry - do not mean to cause a problem with this. But I'm afraid that if those who feel that certain standards should be observed do not say so - soon we will have people touring major cities in their pajamas (as some kids are now coming to school).

And yes - I have a problem with that too.

And no - I am not a curmudgeon. And I am liberal/tolerant about almost everything you can think of - a card carrying member of the ACLU - but don;t understand why grown people can;t seem to figure out how to dress decently. This is not a "choice" issue for me - but a "respect" one - and it is certainly possible for anyone to combine complete comfort with appropriate attire.

As for Giverney - it's a garden - wear whatever you want.

You can lead a whore to couture but you can't make her think.

First of all, "Degas"- LOL. Funny post.

Secondly, I can understand the desire to not stand out as a tourist when traveling, especially in one of the fashion capitals of the world. But, maybe that's just me.

To the OP, I agree with the advice you've been given thus far- wear comfortable shoes, if they are attractive that's a big plus. Wear lots of layers, because if you find you are too hot you can always take something off, or if you get too cold you can put another layer on. I think the most important thing is being comfortable and enjoying your trip rather than "fitting in." Also, as another poster said, politeness and a show of appreciation for their language will get you onto the good side of any Parisian.

nyt, my post was not directed to just you - but I respectfully disagree that jeans, sweatshirt and tennis shoes are indecent or unrespectful. If you do feel that way, I fear you are often and repeatedly offended by tourists you encounter the world over.

You missed the point. I dressed for a bike ride to Giverney - and missed the train. Instead of going back to the hotel to dress in more "appropriate", "respectful" or "decent" attire, I continued on sight-seeing Paris in that attire - and there was no negative response whatsoever - from anyone.

One last question -- Did Thin John just call me a whore?

No I don't think so Starrsville, that is a funny quote that he changed a bit,
You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think ...is the way it goes, get it? horticulture?

It is a Dorothy Parker saying..

starrsville I don't think he did, except to make a funny play on words.

Dorothy Parker was once asked to use the word 'horticulture' in a sentence.
She responded,
"You can lead a whore to culture , but you can't make her think."

OMIGOD, elaine, we have merged !! ((L))

Great minds think alike.

As long as Johnny is wearing his beaded moccasin, it's all good.

snort! :D

Scarlett, that is too funny, exact same moment.
If we both move to Korea, they can start making more clones of us. :)

That will surely drive some people over the edge LOL

starrsville, the women here should be insulted. Dorothy Parker also said, and a few here should take in.
"Four things I am wiser to know,
Ideleness, sorrow, a friend and a foe."
Did you they clone or clown?

I'm pretty sure ol' Dorothy could spell better than that, LOL.

I don't know, if Dorothy were an old curmudgeon she might have misspelled it!

...and the late, great, Dorothy Parker also told people "i've been too ****** busy, and vice versa" as well as "you can lead a horticulture, but can't make her think"

Now, back to some relevant topics:

Let's just turn the situation around: When you take excursions to little rural locales do you try to dress down and look more "homespun"? Wherever I journey, I dress as I dress in London. You don't need a special uniform. If I'm in Italy and wearing clothes styled in Paris or Antwerp, so what?

If you're chubby, and look American, then go for that look. DSquared^2 always feature very trashy t-shirts with "**** you" and other such names emblazoned upon them. They're creating a pastiche of trash/chav culture, and by doing so are really turning the wearers into a little bit of an artistically ironic joke. I hate their collections, but as a concept it's interesting.

I really do miss the "I'm with stupid" tshirts, especially the ones with the matching arrows, so classy and terse.

Now people in LA are wearing Vote For Pepe tshirts. Where or where is their fashion sense now!

I really do miss the "I'm with stupid" tshirts, especially the ones with the matching arrows, so classy and terse.


I do think it takes at least a certain measure of intelligence to wear the "I'm with stupid" t-shirts, given that those wearing them have to remember what side of the other person to stand on, otherwise they're pointing away from each other. ;)

Glad my post has given some comic releif..

Darling it did. I'm sure they recognize themselves as here.
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