What would you have done?
 

We just returned from a Thanksgiving trip to Chicago and the musical Wicked. This was a much anticipated event for our family, as we made the arrangements and bought the theatre tickets 4 months ago. When you spend $300+ on tickets, you pray the show is good. Our seats were fabulous, dead center about the 8th row of the balcony. My husband is 6'2" and one daughter is 5'8". The other daughter and I are much shorter. Fortunately, our seats included an aisle seat so my husband could sit on the end and stretch his legs. The play was wonderful, we enjoyed it very much. At intermission, we stood up and stretched. At the end of the play, we collected our belongings and made ready to leave. A woman sitting directly behind DH leaned over to me, pointed to him and tall daughter, and said in a very rude tone and made quite a scene, "Next time leave these 2 at home, they don't know how to behave at the theatre." I was mystified, I knew they had not talked. DH informed me that the woman had asked them to move their heads about 15-20 times during the show and that she was dissatisfied because she could not see. Truthfully, I was so upset by her rude behavior, I almost allowed her to ruin the afternoon. The Oriental Theatre in Chicago truly does have a lot of space between rows and I can't imagine she had that much trouble. Alternatively, she could have asked for a booster pillow, which the small child in the next row had and it raised him about 4-6 inches. What would you have done?

I would not move my head. I'd advise this woman not to disturb me the first time, or I'd ask an usher to call security.

If there is a problem, it should not be solved by attendees.

Yikes! Clearly, this rude, disruptive woman is the one who should have stayed home.

You did the right thing by letting it go that day, but it's still bugging you. Same happened to us after some people behind us talked & talked. I asked them, somebody else asked them. Then I asked the security guy to ask them. He suggested to them that they could talk outside the theatre. They shut up.

Pis

I sat next to a nutcase on an airplane recently and had an equally disturbing experience. Honestly, I'd have asked to be seated in the bathroom in only a few more minutes if the stewardess hadn't found the one empty seat on the plane and rescued me. People who were seated nearby came up to me after the flight to exchange stories with me and express their condolences....There are all kinds of people in the world. This experience dominated my feelings about the trip for a few days, then faded into its place as an interesting story, fortunately.

Let the incident go, and be happy you didn't know about the problem earlier, as she could have ruined the performance for you. People like the one's behind you should buy their seats early so they don't have to concern themselves with anyone sitting in front of them. Next time they should purchase box seats (which never offer a full perspective of the stage), front row orchestra (and they can look up and complain of next strain), or the first row of the mezzanine.

Your husband is only 6'2", and your daughter is of average height. What would this woman have done had Shaquille O'Neal been sitting in front of her?

Just be glad that she wasn't sitting behind you in the coach section during a transatlantic flight. She could have been kicking the back of your seat.

I agree with FainaAgain. Let the ushers deal with her, rather than allow her to ask your husband over and over to move his head. If she had a legitimate beef, she would've gone to the ushers herself to have them speak to your husband, but seeing as she was in the wrong, she did the only thing she could - disrupt your husband over and over to try to get what she wanted. If I were him, I would've sat up even taller and smiled at her. :)

That lady interrupted your family 15 to 20 times??? I'd say you have the Most Patient Husband & Daughter in the universe!

There is an epidemic of selfish egotistical "victims" who are entitled to perfection out there right now. aliska, forget her and the whole thing- period. Arguing just gives them more room to move their jaws- ignore them and act with kind forgiveness and it messes up their minds.

I am very short (LOL if you think 5'8" is average in my family). And I live with not seeing much of the time. And I also find main floor top dollar seats can sometimes be the worse for me. But it isn't anyone elses problem. Nor was this yours.

You might call them patient. Or they might be pushovers. If they had refused to move the first time she asked, she wouldn't have asked again. Or they could have complained to the usher about her, rather than put up with 15 or more requests/interruptions.

I can't even believe that. No wonder she didn't enjoy the show, she was too busy ruining it for your husband! I am very short (5 foot. even) so I constantly have to adjust myself at concerts and musicals. Oh well! These are the genes I got, right? I would NEVER even consider asking someone else to move. Usually whomever I am with offers to switch seats with me.

I was at a concert here in town a few weeks ago. We were sitting in balcony, second row. Well, these two little girls (ok, they were 16, but little to me) came and sat in front of us when the main band was coming on. One turned around and asked if she was in my way. I was upset b/c I didn't want anyone in front of me so I snapped "you will be if you stand up!" I felt a little bad, but paid no mind. Then I realized she was compromising her concert going experience for me by trying to stay out of my way. I apologized and told her not to worry. I knew it was a concert and that was inconsiderate. I should have adjusted myself so I could see. Which I did from then on out.

Wow, long winded. I really just wanted to say that woman was rude and I probably would have said something rude back to her.

People like that are put on earth to make the rest of us look good! What a B**T*... but just let it roll off you for now.. this will be a funny story a few years from now if you let it become so.
Once we were on a flight from UK to Athens Greece.. I put my seat maybe 1/24 of the way back.. (my husband is tall and when you tilt your seat back all the way it hurts his knees) so I never tilt my seat all of the way back.. I am only 5'4" no need!
All of a sudden this gigantic Greek Man, reared up.. leaned OVER MY HEAD.. pushed in the button of my seat control with one hand, while using his other arm to literally FORCE my seat upright! A simple "please put your seat up" would have been enough thank you very much! He did this during a meal and thrust me forward soo strongly that I slammed into my tray table and spilled the contents all over myself! I was nearly crying at the time (jetlag and all) I was upset on and off for quite some time. but you know it's funny now, 5 years later.. though in my mind I just know there is a special place in h**l for that nasty man!

Thanks, it was very cathartic getting this out of my system! I worry a lot with my kids behaving at adult events and have taught them from birth to have manners, be polite, etc. There seem to be 2 forces at work here, 1) people seem to be much ruder today than ever before, and 2) someone else always needs to be the culprit and the person is the victim. Well, I have put this off as an anecdote for the future. I am just sorry I was so shocked I couldn't find my tongue and tell her next time to buy the seats not just for her party, but buy the seats in the row ahead of her as well. Thanks!

I think you handled it well.

The only other thing I can think of is if your husband/daughter offered to switch seats with her. Then she would have complained about the next row of people and not your family.

Don't let her ruin your memories of the play. She's not worth it.

20 years ago part of my job was to move very seriously mentally ill but not dangerous patients between state hospitals on airplanes (get them there as fast as you can!) I bet people are still talking about some of those people and situations I created. One patient yelled from takeoff to landing -" I can't seeeee the ground". God bless those fellow passengers!

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I'm glad that woman doesn't have a season subscription next to me anymore. Last year, I was able to buy perfectly marvelous lower tier seats which I considered quite a coup. Then I learned why. My aisle mate had some kind of compulsive disorder where she would open up a crinkly plastic bag and then shine a small penlight to check her watch. Feeling like Monk The Detective, I began counting her episodes, up to 100 times an act.

I did not renew this year.

Aliska, this woman was way out of line! I would have told her to get a booster seat next time! My mom and I saw the show not too long ago and some kids were behind us and the ushers literally brought them booster seats! I'm 5'8" and have never had anyone complain-sounds like this woman was an old crab!

Aliska, as a former manager in a theatre similar to the Oriental, I agree with the previous posts which say you shouldn't dwell on it and if something similar happens again, let the staff deal with it.

I often had patrons complain to me that they couldn't see because of the person in front of them. I'd explain that our guillotine was broken and offer to move them if seats were available. Usually, when I told them the seats were in the back corner or someplace worse than where they were sitting they'd learn to deal with it.

"guillotine was broken" - LOL!

Hi Aliska,

There is occasion when the behavior of some make me think to myself, "Oh, if only I weren't a lady!"

You did the right thing in not allowing it to ruin your day.

When I am slammed by this rude behavior, in order to forget it, I think, it could be worse, SHE could be my mother-in-law instead of the sweet, loving MIL I am lucky enough to have.

That always makes me smile, you may change up the relative form as needed...

Yesterday I was at the grocery store, and while the fella was bagging my groceries, the checker rudely humiliated him in front of all of us by saying, "C'mon Joe, can't you bag any faster, we need to keep these people moving." I looked at poor Joe and said, loud enough for the checker to hear, "How terrible it must be for you to work with someone so mean and rude." Suddenly the sad embarrassed face disappeared, he smiled at me and winked, and I was on my way. It was GREAT !

Long live the nice people, lol.

A few years ago, we took some visitors to see Lord of the Dance. Halfway through, I was jabbed in the back by the lady (little & old) behind me .. I thought I had been stabbed for a minute! She wanted me to move over some so she could see past me. She was quite small and low in her seat. I did my best, but she needed a bumper seat.
It was annoying, I was conscious of her the rest of the performance.
I can understand a person being miffed if they can not see around the person in front of them, but that is life. Not everything is Stadium seating and it has long been part of the experience to figure there might be a head in front of you that will block some of your view.
I don't think there is anything you could have done..and she was very rude.

I was at a concert earlier this month where a lady in front and to the left of me accused me of kicking her seat constantly. I made her look down to see that there was physically no way, since my legs were too short to even reach! She barely believed me. Well, I felt the kicking she described as well, and I think it was some kind of vibration in the seats/foundation.

Aliska,
I'm 5'2" and I've dealt with tall people in front of me in theatres all my life. Hey, it's just the luck of the draw - sometimes it's a small child in front, sometimes a basketball player! We short people learn to deal with it - all except the "wicked witch" you met up with.

I've never, ever asked someone to move his head so that I could see better. How rude! She was completely out of line and your husband is a saint.

My husband is 6'6" and built like Shaq and I always dread finding seats in a theater because we always hear the "Oh great he is sitting in front of us." He tries to scrunch down but there really is no room for his legs. We get aisle seats for the same reason. If the old biddy had gone after my husband he probably would have asked her if she would like him to sit up straighter! Your husband sounds like a peach! I always try to be glad I am not the kind of person who goes through life being irritated by everyone and everything.

Aliska, Good question. I'm 5'2", my dtr is 4'10" So we expect that we may well have our sight line partially blocked. That's not the fault of people who are taller than we are (which is nearly every adult in the country) !
However, last time it happened was at an old restored theater with absolutely no gradient between rows of seats. We missed a lot of the show/dance part of the concert
(Keali'i Reichel--and all Hawaii visitors here will know how disappointing that was). I found myself a bit annoyed--not at other attendees, but at the theater restoration planners!! Surely in the course of fixing the place up, they could have put a little angle betewen seats? (Same way i feel in a ladies' bathroom at a large theater, where there are only 4 stalls and the intermission line is horrendous! OIbviously, the bathroom planner looks at toilets from a male point of timing.) Oh well, who knows what goes tjrough the minds of theater designers?? (-:

So, now I call the theater directly, in advance--about what the seating arrangements are like. It's helped in places where there are kids events too--like colisuem type venues where they extend the available seats by putting seats on the flat part of the ice rink--leaving the little kids unable to see at all .
I agree with Faina. Call the usher--then if necessary, let them call security, and let them handle it. That's what I've done when people talk through a performance, and it's alwasy resolved. Once iot meant the talker started shouting at the usher, and was escorted from the theater with his mortified family. We, the people behind them, then had a quiet performance with perfect view of the stage!!

Calinurse,

too funny, I'm 5'1 and I wonder if that's why I hate the cinema! I don't get a good view unless we visit our local Imax where the seating is very steep. Last year we went to see The Polar Express in 3D and it was wonderful. The effects were wonderful and at one point the train appears to stop a couple of foot from your face!

We also saw the last Harry Potter movie (not 3D) and it's nice to know that however tall the person is in front of me I have a clear view.

Calinurse, generally you can expect sightline problems in a "restored" theatre as many were built as cinemas and are now presenting live shows. They're usually much wider and not as tall.

The seats were designed so you could see a movie screen that was only a few feet behind the proscenium and extended 15-20 feet off the stage. With a live performance, the people in the balcony and rear orchestra often can't see the stage floor because the rows don't have a steep enough grade. So, if seeing the dancers' feet is important, be sure to get seats front and center.

I'm 5'1" and I have a 6'5" son- so I'm also used to scoping spaces out where I can get the big guys on the aisles and I can try to get a gap. But I never make it someone else's problem or fault.

Any older or restored theatre, I think the Auditorium in Chicago is one, I always tend to get lowest balcony because main floor seating usually gives me terrible sight lines. If I take my mom (wheel chair) then it gets super dicey, no matter the pricing. At "Miss Saigon" we were in the orchestra pit- literally.

My ears! and you could see the spit.

When we were at the White Sox Rally (Oct. 28) I let the others tell me what they could see when the team came got within 30 feet. I could see them at a farther distance but mostly in any crowd if I try to see closer sights all I see is backs and elbows.

Next time just marry somebody shorter. So much easier to just avoid situations like this altogether by planning ahead!

More to the point - what did YOU do when she made those remarks? You were sitting right next to your husband & daughter & you never saw her turn around to speak to them?

I would have ignored her comments.

Well, this has been very interesting. As for the comments about whether/not I noticed anything, no I did not. At intermission, the crazy woman said nothing to me or to any of us and we never left the vicinity. As to my patient husband, yes, he is a doll. He sat on the end and I never saw or heard anything. We have forgotten this episode and chalked it up to future family anecdotes. but just thought I would share - we are making plans to visit NYC for the kids' spring vacation the 3rd week of March, so short theatre goers BEWARE. Thanks!