In 1994, my parents a gave me and my fiancee $5000 for our wedding, and we managed to have a really classy one for 75 guests and stayed within the budget.
We did use a wedding chapel in Texas (www.theweddingcottage.com), which really helped in the budget since their package included so much! I would highly recommend that option.

My sister got married in Vegas, and it was nice. There are SO many different places to choose from. Each of the big hotels does weddings, plus all of the small chapels, etc. You can be as classy or as tacky as you like!

Do you have to pay for the six guests' travel expenses? That is going to be a huge reduction in your budget...

THANK YOU!! You're giving me so many wonderful ideas! I'm getting excited about the wedding! :)

Unfortunately we can't buy the house first because we're planning to move next year (we hope to get married sometime this year). We also haven't ruled out eloping as the last resort. My friends did it and they are very happy. If things are getting too stressful, we might end up going that route.

I thought about it more and still want to pick up the cost for 4 of the guests (down from the original estimate of 6). They are in a dire financial situation and won't be able to travel, but I want them at the wedding and am willing to pay for them. I think I need to set aside roughly $2,000 for their travel and lodging cost, which leaves me about $3,000 for the actual wedding. But I'm hopeful that we might be able to pull it off using all the resourceful ideas that have been suggested so far.

THANK YOU AGAIN!!

I'm in the midst of planning a spectacular wedding on a budget, and it certainly can be done, for many more than 12 guest. We're doing 100 with not much more of a budget.

Did you know you can rent wedding dresses? Consigment shops, Recycler classifieds.

Wait--did you say Boston? FILENE'S!!!

Selecting a venue that has no liquor license that allows you to bring your own saves a huge chunk of the liquor costs. Or just do champagne and cake, or maybe just light appetizers.

Also, check Craig's list for photographers. We found many students and recent college grads looking to build their portfolio willing to shoot for free. Only photo cost would then be your prints you choose.

Culinary schools can be a great source for catering.

You should pop over to The Knot--you'll find many more ideas there.

Don't elope. You can do this with little stress.

When you only have 10-12 people they are your close family and closest friends. They don't expect or need everything to be perfect or to have over the top flowers and food. They won't even notice. They are there for you, not food and flowers.

My daughter wanted to stay small so she could be more relaxed. She can really stress out and I was amazed at how calm and relaxed she was on her big day.

Dreamer2 -
It was David's on Brown Square. We were married in the Congregational church right across the street in Newburyport.

Talk about stress. We brought my future mother-in-law there for dinner one night to show her the setting - it was called Brown's Restaurant then I think.

It was pretty slow, and the chef came out and thanked us and said he had just bought the place. We almost fell off our chairs, as we had a deposit in with the prior owners. He was great - he honored everything, even the price they had given us. I think we were his first wedding.

Have your wedding in the morning (10AM) and have a sit down brunch for the reception. We served mimosas and bloody marys. It cuts your bar completely out, it does away with having to have music, and breakfast is about 1/3 the cost of lunch or dinner.

I'd "Ask Abby" or Miss Manners about the necessity of footing the bill for the potential guests in dire financial straights. That's 40% of your budget. Hmmm. Unless they were my parents, that would give me pause.

Small and memorable doesn't require a cathedral length veil, or tuxes. Since my parents were both deceased, I/we paid for our wedding ourselves. It's amazing how your priorities line themselves up when you are footing the bill. We, too, were buying a house.

No rehearsal dinner, afternoon wedding, small guest list. Reception was at a pretty restaurant with hors doeuvres. We had Mrs. Field's Chocolate Chip cookies arranged on a tiered cake plate as our wedding "cake". Inside joke...

Musicians were from the local conservatory. Flowers were two arrangements for the altar and we girls carried single long stemmed roses.

No limo.

Hubby bought a new suit. I wore a cream suit, too. Two attendants on either side; they were asked to wear something appropriate and since everyone was so relieved to be clear of the dreaded bridesmaid dress they chose very nice attire.

Photographer: paid him for the time and I did my own album. Believe me, I'm not a photographer and it is VERY doable. Best yet, I have the proofs and negatives.

Congratulations on asking a good question, and best wishes on your wedding day.

JCrew has a great wedding section with very reasonably-priced dresses.

We had a destination wedding in New Orleans at the Women's Opera Guild Home, but I had 100 guests, so this venue might be too large for you. A great space for a smaller group is the Degas House on Esplanade which is also a guest house; your group would fit nicely. Willow Catering was our caterer and did a fantastic job keeping within a budget and not trying to oversell me on a bunch of useless food/drink. Had a d-lish cake from a lady who makes them at her home (Willow can put you in touch) and flowers from another lady who works from her home (cake-lady connection). These connections kept our costs far below what most people spend.

My daughter purchased her gown at the Penny's outlet store and it was beautiful and very economical!
My husband and his uncles made Hungarian sausage and we found caterers to make the side dishes for 200 people. We hired a DJ to spin records and rented a hall at our community center. You can do it mami! but most of all, whatever you do, have fun.

i'm getting married soon (less than three weeks!). I would suggest you check out theknot.com and check out the 'local board", like the boston board. you will be able to find deals and read reviews from recent brides. i did that for my wedding in WI and it helped so much -

good luck and happy planning!

becca

I would also recommend a morning wedding with a brunch afterwards. Not only will it be cheaper and less stressful, but that way you can get out of town for the honeymoon! I also think the dresses at JCrew are really cute.

Wow, I really didn't expect I was going to get so many great suggestions. Thank you!

I'm surprised to hear that JCrew sells wedding dresses. Don't remember seeing a wedding section at their stores. I'll check their web site.

I'll also check out theknot web site. Didn't know about them either.

This is slightly off the topic, but if we decide to have a wedding locally, how do I tell local friends who are not invited without hurting their feelings? This is such a dilemma for me... Maybe I'll ask Abby about this... :)

Perhaps you could tell them you are having a very small family wedding.

Hello mami, I agree with Starrsville. I sure understand your concern about friends etc. that will not be invited to your wedding. But saying that you will have "just family" for your wedding should take care of that problem. And if later you want to have a simple party with friends, not a reception, but perhaps wine and some appetizers after you have been married and had your honeymoon etc. that would be fun. You could make it casual and make it clear "no gift please, just the pleasure of your company would be appreciated" comment on the invitation.

People really do understand when you say you are having a small family wedding.

Okay, try this one on for size.

Rent a home for a week on the Cape. It can serve as the needed lodging for your out-of-town guests and the location for your small private reception. Here's an example -

http://www.vrbo.com/20570

The ocean beach is a 3 minute car ride away. Caravan to the beach for your exchange of vows. Drive back to the house for a simple reception.

Get a cake from a local store. Allow your family and guests to pitch in and create a small buffet for your reception (check out the deck on this house). ESPECIALLY if you are forking out money to get them there, they will be HAPPY to contribute something to your special day.

Your out-of-town guests could spend the night if need be, but leave the next day to allow the two of you a few days of honeymoon.

Simple flowers you do yourself. The dress you choose. I like an earlier poster's idea to have your attendents choose what they wear.

I would do this rental as a family get-togther rather than a wedding because of images of 50-100 people partying in their home may cause distress. If that is what you plan to do, then forget this suggestion.

What do you think?

You can also rent dresses in Las Vegas, if you want local suggestions you can contact me therough my email addy Mimi. A rental dress would run about $200-$250, my first gown was rented when we eloped (h)

Also, you may get a reduced rate if you want to treat your guests to a buffet afterwards, I know some see it as tacky but many wedding couples do this. Not saying that you have to wear your dress of course but it is also an economical alternative.

Mami, if you live near Boston, why not have your reception on the water? There are Odyssey Cruises out of Boston where the highest price dinner is $92 (Sat night, board at 7, cruise 8-11) and it includes appetizers, entrees, desserts and dancing to live music. At 12 guests, that's just over $1100. If you do it as a brunch on Sat or Sun, the prices are almost half that cost.
Because you have a small party, you'd have to ask how they could accommodate your group. I've never been on the Odyssey but I was on a wedding cruise in NJ (yes, it was NJ and very pretty) where they rented the entire boat (I think there were about 75-100 guests) and cruised up the river to the bridges and Statue of Liberty just as the sun was setting.

And of course for wedding gown cost cutting, there's always the Filene's Basement wedding gown sale!

friends should understand when you say you are having a very small, family wedding. but don't be surprised if some offer to throw you a shower or celebration afterwards.

jcrew only sells their wedding dresses via catalog or online. they have specific wedding consultants to help you choose the right dress. check it out online. they are simple, beautiful and less than $500/dress.

i like the idea of renting a house on the beach for a week. if you do go with a restaurant, do not call it a wedding. prices tend to double when it is a wedding. we had a few instances of that when planning our wedding. and because of it, those compnaies will never get our business now.

you can get great, fresh flowers from costco very cheap. their roses are beautiful and i know a lot brides raid their flower section the day before the wedding and make up their own arrangements and bouquets.

with such a small group, you don't need a huge cake and frankly, a lot of grocery stores sell great cakes. burn a bunch of mix cds for music. and keep it simple, stress-free and fun!

good luck! you must let us know what you decide.

There was a thread beginning in Dec 04 regarding weddings, titled:
*Do you assume your chilren are invited to weddings?*

I tried to top it but the editors ended that option.

However I encourage you to type the title in the search box and read some of the posts.

There's a lot of wisdom there regarding weddings, wisdom that goes far beyond the issue of children attending.

I do think you'll find it helpful in your planning.

Best wishes.