North Carolina or South Carolina???
 

Hello-

Both my husband and I are looking to relocate from NJ to either North Carolina or South Carolina.

We were told that Greenville is a place that we should consider. My only problem is that there is a Greenville in both states! LOL!

We are pretty laid back people and are looking for an area that has a decent cost of living. NJ is out of control! Friendly people, Employment opportunities for either technical or professional jobs, Good public school systems and a thriving cultural environment to raise our 7 year old son. We like the warm weather and LOVE THE OCEAN!! We can tolerate the humidity only if there is a pool or ocean nearby : )

We are tired of the rat race and need to EXHALE. We love bike riding, going to nice restaurants, plays. We also would like to find that small town feel. But not too small if you know what I mean.

Any suggestions??

Definitely, G'ville, SC (not NC).

Have you done any research on this board? There are lots of threads discussing moves to the Carolinas.

Yes, I have been reading the posts. You did not explain why not NC?

Thanks for the quick reply

C-A

Greenville, SC not Greenville, NC.

There are many delightful places to live in NC, but Greenville is not one of them (IMHO)

Greenville, SC is a wonderful town in the western part of the state. It has good schools, good restaurants, good shops and it is very close to great outdoor activities.
Greenville, NC is a university town. East Carolina University to be specific. It is in a hot, humid pocket in the eastern part of the state and has little to recommend it.
On the whole I prefer NC to SC, but not on the Greenville v Greenville issue.

Ok so not Greenville NC. What areas in NC/SC should we look into? We are planning a road trip to get a feel for the Carolinas but they are big states and we have a limited amount of time. So my question to you all is can you give me 10 places to look into in both NC and SC.

Thanks much!

How far is reasonble for you to want to drive to the ocean? 2 hrs? 4 hrs? Obviously you can have a pool anywhere. I don't know about Greenville NC even though I live in Asheville NC. I do know Greenville SC as I travel there frequently for business. Many northerners that I know who have settled there find it very(too) conservative - and it is probably one of the more liberal SC towns - at least compared to Columbia(SC). That being said they have a pretty little downtown, theatre, zoo, a river with a park and walking area and are near the mtns. Charleston lives from its tourism base and housing is expensive and of course there's always the issue of hurricanes.
Have you considered Raleigh area? It seems like that might meet a lot of your criteria. I don't know about Wilmington NC - I know there is a University there and seems to be a fair amount of industry and of course you are very close to the ocean so once again you have to worry about hurricanes.

You really need to research the school systems in NC and SC for your son. The Raleigh, Cary and Wake Forest areas of NC are great places. Charlotte is also a very nice area in NC. I know the school systems are pretty good in the above mentioned places. NC has wonderful beaches. We go to the Outer Banks several times a year, especially the Duck/Corolla end. As someone else said, research and visit to see where you feel most at home. Good luck!

Greenville, SC is far away from the ocean. I think it is about three hours drive to Charleston, SC

The two Greenvilles share at least one thing--they both have major universities in them which provides a great deal of activities and probably technical jobs.
The NC G'ville is in eastern NC which brings a lot of baggage, particularly with regard to politics and religion which may not fit with your NJ background.
I believe you should surely come south for an extended trip and see the areas. The Research Triangle of Raleigh,Durham and Chapel Hill is the techno center of NC. Schools are good. Charlotte is a banking mega center and all that brings.
SC has absoulutely turned their education system around.
Beaches are easily accessible within 3 hours or less from anywhere from Charlotte east. You will not find more beautiful beaches anywhere than North or South Carolina.
I will say about Charlotte, it is a big town with a very small town feel, believe it or not. Very accessible amenities.

I would like to be within 2 hours from the ocean. We did visit the Outer Banks, we were in Cape Hatteras and I did not like the "ruralness" about the area. We vacation each year in Cape May NJ and love it. To live there would be too expensive. I understand about the hurricanes thanks for pointing that out to me.

We are more liberal than conservative, so a conservative area would not be for us.

Yes, I will and have been researching the school systems as it is a very important factor in where we decide to make our home.

Thank you for the replys, believe it or not they are helping me tremendously.

Regards,

Carol Ann

"We did visit the Outer Banks, we were in Cape Hatteras and I did not like the "ruralness" about the area."

Oh, for pity's sake... I have been sitting here on my hands wishing you would please rethink moving to the South.

I just looove it when people from up north say that they are "laid back" and want "friendly people," and then in the next breath they make a comment like the "ruralness" one - making it sound like they think they are too cosmopolitan to spend any time in a backward area where they might run into "farmers" :O or some other such undesirables.

Move closer to Cape May since you just love it... Sheesh...

Carol Ann - having been to Cape May a few times I know what you like but doubt that you are going to find anything resembling that down here...Georgetown, SC maybe a little but driving through there I was put off by the strong smells of industry/paper mills or something that smelled bad. Wilmington, NC which has a lot of historic housing and a neat downtown... While Raleigh has a lot going on you are still about 3 or more hrs from most NC and SC beaches.
Otherwise it is going to be tough to meet your requirements of 2 hrs from the beach, fairly liberal...
Again, I hesitate to suggest Charleston because of the cost of housing/living and lack of professional jobs - except maybe in health care. Others may chime in on this but friends who live/lived in Charleston describe it as very
clique-y.

I think those who are concerned about the conservatism in the south in general are not well informed. Yes, the south is conservative, but in all the nice ways, and not so much that it would really rub you the wrong way. You'd have to be a flaming liberal and a card-carrying member of the ACLU before you'd be bothered by the conservatism in South Carolina. Both North and South Carolina are quite progressive, and I think you will like the feel of a growing area with a positive outlook.

Having said that, and trying to read your mind with regard to the kind of physical and social environment you like, and taking your love of the ocean into account, here are my recommendations:
-North Carolina: Fayetteville, Goldsboro, Rocky Mount, Raleigh-Durham, and (nearly in VA) Roanoke Rapids.
-South Carolina: Florence, Sumter, Columbia.

Whatever you pick in those states, I think you will find a more gentle, more friendly atmosphere and a very agreeable climate along with reasonable cost of living. Good luck.

Before moving to the South I lived in DC - 8 years and grew up in Chester County, PA - Having lived for 5 years in SC (Columbia and Beaufort) and in Asheville NC for 5 years I'll make some comments about Wayne's recommendations about places to live and conservatism.
Particularly in the towns that he recommended you will find for the most part very traditional Southern views with pockets of liberals. These might be the people who own the local bookstore, the more creative/best restaurant in town, university students, or occasionally some of the military.
Here are the things to be prepared for:
1. You will be asked where you go to church. In most towns any church will be acceptable - an answer of "I don't attend" will be greeted with raised eyebrows or perhaps seen as a possibility to bring you along to their church. In the towns that Wayne mentioned Baptist is the most acceptable answer.
2. Do not plan activities or get togethers for Wednesday nights. Even in Asheville, a VERY liberal town - and some would say the MOST liberal in the South - you are doomed if you plan something on a Wednesday nite which is church nite.
3. If you are a Democrat you will be viewed with suspicion in many small towns. The acceptable party is Republican.
4. Gays are tolerated - but just barely.
5. Interracial marriages/dating are frowned on.
6. Women are expected to be married by their early 30's at the latest and not having children is a sign of selfishness.
7. High school and college sports are paramount. Game day at USC(Columbia) is awe inspiring in a frigtening way to see 5 year old girls dressed up like miniature cheerleaders.

I don't know much about Florence but Sumter is a nothing town supported by the military and home to the largest manufacturing and sales of doublewide trailers. Columbia is miserably hot and humid from about May until early October. Many people there are still irritated that the Confederate flag was finally moved from the State house. Fayetteville or Fayette-nam is home to Fort Bragg - and that's about it. Lots and lots of chain restaurants. Goldsoro - home to Seymour Johnson Air Base(Air Force) - their claim to fame is BBQ restaurants. I understand there is more going on in those towns now then when my brother and future sister-in-law lived there 10 years ago but I cannot imagine that they have changed that much - the South in general is slow to change. Oh, they may change superficially with new buildings, industry, and a Starbucks but the attitudes die hard.
That being said, I love Asheville and would NEVER move back north. Once you are accepted here you will have fast friends. Of course I (finally) got married and now I go to the Baptist church:) but I never have a ladies nite on a WEd nite.

Let me give you a little background of our family. Both my husband and I are in our 40's, we have a 7.5 year old son who's Godfather is Gay, Godmother is straight. I have lots of gay friends, black friends,white friends, etc. Our take on life is to "Live and let live" just as long as you dont disrespect or hurt my family, friends or my home. We are not Republicans, nor are we dedicated Democrats. We are a very spiritual family but not fanatical. Our son was baptized and we are struggling to have him receive Communion since we are not "practicing Catholics". I had him baptized because it was the "right thing" to do at the time, but since then both my husband and I are "searching" from a religious standpoint to see where we "really belong". If that makes sense. I certainly would not be happy in an area where the people are overly conservative. We are looking for a place that we will be accepted for who we are, a place where if I needed to get to a hospital it will be fairly close, where my neighbors just enjoy having a good time and not pressing their viewpoints or religious beliefs on us. I am tired of people who are very competitive and the "keeping up with the Jones' mentality. We want our son to grow up "well rounded" to see what life is really about.

In response to Diana's insane reply.
"Ruralness" does not equate to laid back and friendly???. My best friend grew up on a farm??? I think you cut off the circulation to your brain from sitting on your hands to long! : ) Please let me know where YOU live so that I may delete it from my home search!....Ugh!

Carol Ann...you sound a lot like me - only I wasn't married when I moved to the South. Look at some articles/websites that rate places according to some of the things that are important to you - health care, education etc. I would pick a bigger city as opposed to a small town and maybe be a bit more flexible on the drive time to the beach. Anywhere you go it will take you a while to find friends to hang out with...other parents at your son's school, work - but they'll be there. Find a place that meets your needs, see if you can find a job there and then do it...it'll all work out.

Check into Cary - full of folks exactly like you and you would fit right in.

One of my favorite towns in South Carolina is probably Aiken. It meets many of your criteria, including proximity to the beach.

Sumter's crime rate is very high. Columbia is arguably the hottest spot in the state and feels much like any state capital -- not much southern charm here.

B/

Greenville, SC is by far the greatest place to live in the entire country, but I'll admit to being a little prejudiced. But be forewarned, if you move next door to me, I will invite you to my church, but will forgive you if you decline!

If you took that much offense to Diana's comments, you are going to have a hard time living in the Carolinas.

Based on your comments, I think Asheville would be the best fit. Other than that, other locations would be a distant second, third, etc. Maybe Cary, Durham, Raleigh. I don't think SC would be a good fit for you - even Greenville or Charleston.

East. Move to East Carolina.

Yep, be prepared as a Yankee moving to the South! Many will think you are arrogant and rude, because you are from the NE. I've given this advice before, but you have to live in an area that shares your values and beliefs. You will be unhappy as a liberal moving to a conservative state and vice versa. Good luck on your decision.

I will look into Cary, Raleigh and East Carolina. I took offense to Diana's ignorant interpretation of "ruralness" I meant the ruralness of the landscape, surely not the people!! Very rude and shallow of her! Anyways, I am not getting a good feeling about the Carolinas but will inquire about the places you have all mentioned.

Thanks much for all of your help!

C-A

Again, if you took offense at Diana's comments, I would rethink your decision to move south. Ms_Jingles gives good advice.

Yes, I dont think the Carolina's are ready for us or we're not ready for them! LOL

Thanks Again

We just retired to Durham after over 30 years in the DC suburbs. Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill is a totally delightful place. Unemployment is quite low, and many businesses are relocating to the Research Triangle because of the availabililty of good workforce. We were comfortable with our choice to relocate here, because it is a diverse, sociable, and very good place to live.

Last week our daughter came to visit from NYC. She went to college at NC State, and has many friends from UNC  so we met up with some of her old college friends while she was here. The sociability across generations is one of the reasons we "retired" here -- can't imagine living somewhere in Florida where, excuse me, but there's just too many old people.

We drove to Topsail Island for a couple of days and found the beach to be one of the nicest I've EVER been to (we used to visit Assateague Nat'l seashore). There are a handful of motels, but mostly beach houses that rent out by the week/month. It's a very family oriented place, but there were a couple of nice "grown up" restaurants, too. We drove into Wilmington for lunch and to check out the riverwalk along the Cape Fear River before heading home.

Haven't made a trip to the mountains yet, but we only got here June 1 so there is plenty of time for that.

You might want to plan to rent for a while before you buy. The real estate market down here isn't as frantic as it is in the Northeast, so you can take your time to pick out a neighborhood that fits your needs best. That's especially important if you can't take a week to visit before deciding to relocate (which I highly recommend). We've known the general area for many years (my DH is a UNC graduate).

Great Advice! Thank you!

Think about it--a 2 hour commute to the beach in Jersey might be a tolerable 3 hour in NC.
Take a look at Charlotte. Room for liberal and conservative. 3 hours from the beach.

SC: Greenville/Spartenburg
NC: Piedmont town with a college or university (Raleigh, Chapel Hill, Greensboro, Charlotte).
Mtns: Ashville, Brevard area

In a post,Tam says " Our take on life is to "Live and let live" just as long as you dont disrespect or hurt my family, friends or my home."

You will be fine in the South as long as you also apply this to those who are already here.

Carol Ann - check out findyourspot.com
I searched and it is still there..may help you. Also bestplaces.net
best wishes to you...

"I took offense to Diana's ignorant interpretation of "ruralness" I meant the ruralness of the landscape, surely not the people!!"

Bless your heart! Of course that's what you meant - how silly of me. I can't believe I didn't see that immediately.

"Anyways (sic), I am not getting a good feeling about the Carolinas...I dont think the Carolina's (sic) are ready for us or we're not ready for them!"

Please do know that I'm sure we're all crushed that we won't get to experience your mid-life crisis, but do most certainly be sure to keep us in mind for the future after you've "found yourself."

We'd just LOVE to have you! :D

I'm not just shocked, I'm absolutely overwhelmed by the negativism about the so-called conservatism and church addicts in the Carolinas. You can believe me when I say that it is obvious that leahinsc has had some personal problems and has developed some kind of phobia about the South in general. I'm here to tell you that she is misleading you in the meanest kind of way. Her claims are baseless and do not apply to the population in general or even to a large percentage of the population -- except where she said that college football is the number one subject. That's certainly true in the fall anyway.

I don't want to urge you to go somewhere you don't like, but getting out of NJ is probably a good decision for you; and going to the Carolinas is also probably a good decision. I sincerely urge you to visit a few of the towns you might consider, then move to one that appeals to you. If you have some reservations about putting down roots, rent for a year or two as someone wisely recommended. I think you will find that the wild observations about such radical conservatism are completely false.

Greenville, NC is within striking distance of some of the nicest beaches in the country. You could probably get yourself a sweet waterfront property on the Pamlico River for a decent price. I'm thinking about doing it myself.

Your remark about humidity bothers me. The Coastal Regions of South Carolina are HUMID. 100% humidity is not uncommon and it can raise the heat index up into the 100s. If you need to stay in a pool or near the ocean, you may be in for trouble. This time of year the water in pools and the ocean are quite warm. It doesn't do much for cooling a person. In fact, some of the worse humidity may be found near the ocean. If you have any respiratory problems, the South is not for you. We stay in air conditioned homes for months.

A lot of the inland areas of SC are near Swamps. That's pretty bad too. Not to mention the bugs!! It's not called the Low Country for nothing.

Diana

You've just blown the hell out of the idea that Southerners are well-bred and good-mannered. Congrats!

After reading Leah's interesting post, I just had to add a story about Sumpter, SC and the "Spirit of the New South." In 1986, as an engineer, I had to do some business with the local Chrysler-Plymouth dealership and the service department manager. He was a black man of about 45 and he sported a gold tooth. His two secretaries were white women of about forty and both looked safely middle-class. The amount of filthy, gutter language that emanated from this man's mouth directed at no one in particular was staggering and was more appropriate to a football locker room. He was completely shameless and without manners. Twenty years before, this man would certainly have not been a manager of anything in Sumpter, SC so I suppose his status as a manager is progress. On the other hand, that such a foul-mouthed, coarse man would be a manager of anything puts to doubt whether his success is in anyway any source of progress.

Let me second uhoh_busted's delight with Topsail Island, home of some of the most wonderful shoreline in our country. I've vacationed at Topsail for over 35 years and look forward to a week with the family in September and in October, hurricanes permitting. uhoh_busted, just don't let too many people know what a nice beach Topsail is. I like the quiet.

WeaselBoy,

Sorry darlin,' but there's only so much even the best-bred and raised of us can take before we blow a gasket. :O

The notion that people can just come on down and expect everyone who was raised here to accommodate and embrace all their neuroses and values can wear a bit on a body after awhile.

I guess I will have to ask the ladies at my next Daughters of the Confederacy meeting or the Junior League luncheon later this week what the official tolerance level is for "losing it" with rude and nasty Yankees.

I used to think it was having had anything to drink containing brown liquor, but I guess The Late Unpleasantness has me a bit unnerved.

Oh, and by the way, "Frankly, I don't give a damn..." This is the New South!