Rave: Out to a tappan-yaki dinner tonight with eight of us celebrate a birthday today! Should be fun.

Rave: DD finished out her water polo season and is up for MVP at the awards banquet. They had a great season.

Rave: Lots of new snow up in the mountains, snowboarding season is starting early this year. Our condo is booking fast for the Dec. months, I hope we get to use it! LOL

Rave: Had a fun dinner with DD & DH last night our local Red Robin. Lots of strawberry lemonade and Red Robin fries before birthday shopping!

Rave: Started swimming more laps at the gym after my bike/weight training workouts.

Rave: I'm starting to plan for our Santa Barbara anniversary trip in early December. I'll have lots of questions later on about that.

Rave: On Tuesday, George Bush will be re-elected for another four years!

Rant: Farenheit 911 was a horrible movie. I just got around to watching in last week, and turned it off before it was even finished. I can't believe that made it to the big screen last summer.

Rave: Kids are off to concerts and Magic Mountain for the weekend. It will be rather quiet around our house for a couple of days.

Rave: The rain! We needed it so badly here, now everything looks like Oregon, LOL! Have a spooooooky weekend! ***kim*** (~~)

Faina--Do you mind me asking a personal question about your stillborn? My email is [email protected]

I've never been through this and none of my friends have experienced it so hope you don't feel I'm invading your privacy...

This has been one helluva sucky day but I appreciate everyone's good wishes.

GoTravel--a friend is making calls but I needed to tell my parents myself. It was so hard but they were more worried about me than anything. My poor mom and dad are so sad. That's why I didn't want to have to tell them...

OWJ, I'm so glad your friend is able to take that burden off you and your husband! Your parents will be fine and now is the time to concentrate on you.

One tip, when I went through a very serious illness with my husband, I let my friends and family take over. I told one person how I was feeling, what I needed and God Bless them, they sprang into action. If you aren't up for company, don't feel like you can't tell your friend and let him/her spread the word. Ditto if you are feeling opposite. Let the people who love you take care of you.

{{{{OneWanderingJew}}}} Cyber hugs. I am <i>so</i> sorry to hear your news. That is heartbreaking. Prayers that you'll find comfort and consolation from those all around you who love and grieve with you. Your parents will surprise you, their anguish will be for you and your husband without a thought of disappointment, other than yours. Their hearts will ache for you. As you will find years from now, you will feel your grown children's anguish almost as acutely as when they were still at home with you.

cd...sorry too for what is going on in your lives. These things end as suddenly as they begin--one day, one fortuitous contact--good luck in the hunt.

And Bonnie--Terrific!

Nasty little buggers aren't they Scarlett! Ouch...then itchy itchy. My bites normally clear up with no problem.

GoTravel...wow, welcome to FL! Will he start another restaurant?

And now some rants and raves...

Rave: I voted today

Fact: I stood in line for 2 hours 20 minutes to do it. But we all knew lines were long and growing by the day. We came and enjoyed a sunny day and visited with everyone standing in line with us. Fine morning, really!

BUT...RANT: ABC news was outside our polling place with an anchor animatedly and loudly discussing the long lines and how people are growing frustrated and angry. SO untrue!!! Most of us were having a reasonably good time and everyone was just waiting patiently. The reporter was the only one who sounded frustrated and angry! LOL

Rant: Press trying to make news, rather than simply report it.

Rave: Next week at this time we won't have to suffer through anymore political ads.

OWJ, seconding GoT - please do take care of yourself this weekend and let others help, too, if you need them. Do you have a rabbi you can talk to down there?

Many, many hugs, remember that you did nothing wrong, and also remember you've got a heck of a lot of people sending prayers to you and your husband. You are not alone.

Rave: We are on vacation in beautiful Big Sky, Montana.
Double Rave: 12 inches of beautiful snow here. Look out one window and see the lake...look out the other window and see the snow covered mountains!
Rant: Have to go home on Sunday and report back to the real world.

OO
&quot;Rave: Next week at this time we won't have to suffer through anymore political ads&quot;

No, but depending on your side of the line, half of us are likely to be suffering from one of the parties responsible for those ads.

OWJ - I am so very sorry for your loss.

OWJ, I am very sorry for your loss. The supportive comments by fellow posters should be helpful in some way I hope. ((l))

OWJ, It's hard to come up with the words and to say &quot;I know how you feel&quot; sounds so trite and shallow. Sadly, many of us women, including myself have had things go completely wrong during pregnancy. It IS devastating and you will hold that little spirit close to your heart for the rest of your life.

Please know I do feel for you and wish you the best in the future.

OO I'm not sure! The company that bought him wants him to go to work for them and it would be in South Florida.

I think right now he just wants to take a couple of months off and consider his options.

He's heading to Palm Beach next week to spend some time with his best friend which I'm sure involves fishing, brown liquor, and a golf course or two or three. :-D

I told him to do whatever makes him happy because he's really worked a lot over the past couple of decades which I'm sure you can totally relate to. The hospitality service industry can suck the life right out of you.

Thanks for asking!

Oh, OWJ, my heart is breaking for you. I have family and close friends who have been through this and I know how utterly devastating it is. I pray that God will give you peace and comfort.

OWG-My deepest sympathy. I miscarried at exactly 3 months when I thought everything was going to be ok. I understand what you are going through. Is there a support group in your area?

I was going to post some rants and raves but after reading OWG's post, my rants seem trivial.

BTW Ladies-October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month (even though it's almost over.) Don't forget to get your mammogram.

OWJ- I'm so sorry for your loss. Please know that lots of us care and wish we could help you at this terrible time. Cant remember the hugs, so here's a kiss :-X

OWJ~ I am so sorry for you &amp; your husband. I don't know what else to say except that my thoughts &amp; prayers are with you....please take care of yourself &amp; each other!!! ((L))

OWJ - There are no words. Our prayers are with you.

OWJ..so sorry to hear the news.

OWJ, What devastating news to hear.
You are in good loving hands here. Some who have been through the same heartache.
We all send you love and hugs and as Scarlett said real ones.
This event took the rant out of me, too picayune.

OWJ,
Words are inadequate at such a sorrowful and difficult time. You will both be in my thoughts. STW

Ryan,
Good luck to your brother and may his time apart from you and your children go by very quickly.

All I can say is that I will be happy to see my husband when he comes home from his trip and thankful that during this week I will have an opportunity to hug my sons.

Rave-Fodors People

Rant-Having to live through life's unforseeable tradegy's.

OWJ-I join the rest of your Fodors friends in sending love and peace.

OWJ...so sorry to hear the news. Our thoughts are with you, your husband, and your family. Lean on each other for support!

I was all set to write some rant or something and then read OWJ's post. I am so very sorry. This is some of what I do for work..both as a therapist and as a nurse in high risk newborn care. I do not know if you have delivered yet. If not, you can speak with your MD and with the staff at the hospital and actually have your delivery done as you wish with time to spend with the baby as well. If you want to, have a photographer there you trust and have some photos taken. Beyond that, hopefully someone has referred you to S.A.N.D. which is support after neonatal death. These are groups facilitated by LCSW's usually at birth centers and a place to meet and speak with others who have endured similar losses. Other advice I can offer is to speak about the baby as much as you want to with people. Generally speaking only the rare (and sadly personally experienced) will know you just might need to talk about the baby.

Here's my rave: babies such as yours are that wanted. You deserve to be parents.

Rave: The breadth and depth of a caring Fodors family. God's peace to you, OWJ.

OneWanderingJew: my heart just breaks for you. I had a miscarriage after years of trying to get pregnant, and I felt so utterly sad and heartbroken. But I will tell you this.....it does get better over time. Allow yourself to grieve. Talk about it - with strangers if you have to. Some people simply won't know what to say and may avoid you or avoid talking about it.

I found a lot of help from strangers on ivillage (www.ivillage.com). They have forums to discuss miscarriages and situations like yours. It really helped to talk to others (anonymously) who understood my feelings. Perhaps you might find some help there.

Sorry to ramble, but I just felt your
pain and wanted to help! Take care of yourself!

OWJ: ((L))

OWJ
You &amp; your husband are surrounded
here by many, many friends with open
arms(and ears). I wish for you
hope and comfort.
R5

OWJ, I was all set to read these posts and have my usual weekend laughs. I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. I am sure that tons of prayers and hugs are being sent your way. I hope that you can feel them.
When my son was four he was diagnosed with a rare brain disorder, The doctors thought he would die but couldnt say when. It was the most devasting day of our lives and words cannot explain it.We would be driving home fom Pitts Childrens hospital and it was early fall. I remember looking out the window at the beautiful leaves,there coloring indescrible, and thinking at the same time how cruel life can be.
My son is disabled but he is now 22 and in college. I thank God every day that I have him. I will say many prayers for you and hope that through the support of a loving husband, family and friends you will find some comfort.
Mary

To OWJ, from an ocassional Fodors poster, just want to add my sincere sympathies on your loss.

I was so sad to read your news. I hope you'll take some comfort from seeing how you've touched so many online friends.

Rave: All the caring and supportive people on this board. It is truly amazing. OWJ - my prayers are w/ you and your family.

OWJ,

Lo siento mi amiga.

A glass or two of a great red French Burgundy may help ease the transition to the future and many more children.

M

To onewanderingjew, my heart is broken for you dear one. You are one of my favorite posters, you are always so full of life, of kindness.

I was so happy to know that your were going to have a dear baby. And now that little one is with the angels.

A candle has been lighted in honor of your precious baby.

May you and your husband take comfort in each other. May your parents be comforted also.

So many here on Fodors obviously share in your pain but of course know there is no pain like yours.

But may love and peace find you. May Gods grace be with you. May all our prayers help you in this, your most difficult time.

Love Italy. A great idea. Tomorrow all of us should light a candle for OWJ and their family. Maybe somehow they will feel our support.

Dear Everyone,
You all have brought both tears to our eyes and a smile to our lips. As horrible as this is, it is a most amazing feeling that I take from all of you.

All I know to say is thank you for listening and reaching out.
Debbie

LoveItaly--your words touched me and I wanted to thank you personally. I love the candle idea. I think we'll light one tonight too.

MaryKC--I am a special ed. teacher and have worked with a good number of kids w/TBI and other brain related issues...It makes my heart happy to hear your son is in college after all he went through. I always try to tell my students' parents that you just never know...I have no doubts that it took a lot of hard work on your part and your son's and lots of answered prayers.

OWJ
So, so sorry. Blessings.

marykc, may I suggest that at 9.00am (no matter what time zone one is in) in otherwords 9:00am in your own time zone, that each one of us light a candle for dear OWJ's baby Saturday morning. And say a prayer.

May the angels be with their dear baby, with them and all their family and loved ones.

I have a candle lit this evening. The flame is pointing up to heaven.

Peace to all.

Rant: I caught my son's cold. However, given what some of you here are going through, things could be a lot worse.

Rant: I am a presiding judge in one of our local precincts for Tuesday's election, and I don't want to still be sick since I expect things might be pretty busy.

Rave: Election advertising is almost over!

Rave: Spent a few hours in Santa Fe after a meeting today. Had some great Chinese food at Chow's Chinese Bistro, then went to Trader Joe's. Yum!

Rave: The local guild of organists showed the original Phantom of the Opera tonight, complete with theater organ accompaniment. I laughed myself silly.

Lee Ann

Rave: Am celebrating 16 years of sobriety today. All this week, I have been remembering the bad old days and also the many good people who helped me. That was October 30, 1988. It was a couple of years later when I started travelling internationally, for fun. Can't participate in some social activities now, but the way I had been participating wasn't really social, so the net result is that I am not missing anything.

mrwunfl, CONGRATS!! Good for you! An addiction isn't an easy thing to overcome and I applaud you for your success.

OWJ, maybe you could plant a tree as a rememberence?

Congratulations, mrwonderful. I have a friend who also celebrated his 16th year
of sobriety this summer.
I'm proud of both of you for your recovery. I know how difficult it was.

GoTravel, that is a very nice thought.

mrwunfl...congratulations on a terrific accomplishment!