hey, XXX man, Dickman is my last name, sorry it offends you. and my name is EDIE, not EDDIE. <BR>at least i have the balls to put my real name on a post that might be contrued poorly. unlike you, who is soo comfortable being rude behind the anonymity of these boards. <BR> <BR>btw, i am quite confident that my detractors on this post are people who happily bring their uninvited children to weddings and other adult parties, maybe i struck a nerve? thinking about the special events your child may have disrupted, if not ruined?

Debbie has not checked back in and said anything about whether her child was invited. That may be because she checked the invitation or checked with the Bride and got the news that he is not. Bottom line: if Debbie is offended by the advice not to bring the baby, she should come back on and say so. The rest of you who are defending her absent the facts are just getting in the way.

Those of you who are _attacking_ Debbie absent the facts are not only getting in the way, you are damaging the point and spririt of this forum. Why on earth did one or both of Edie and Whereis bother to bring this back to the top if all they wanted to do was carp and snipe? <BR> <BR>If I were Debbie, I wouldn't respond because some people have already tried to answer her request and the rest is nonsense, pointless, and not even slightly helpful.

At my wedding several years ago, someone bought their walking, curious baby who walked right up to our cake and stuck his fingers in it before anyone could grab him. This was the same child who wailed during most of the ceremony. My advice-Leave the kid at home or with a babysitter. Children do not belong at an adult function such as a wedding. With weddings costing an average of $15,000 they do not belong there!!1

Edie, <BR> <BR>Don't let the defensive bother you. You are 100% right. Sorry, small children and babies are not welcome at most weddings. I asked that no one bring their kids to mine, and I'm glad I did. This is an adult function, with drinking and dancing, and not a time for a guest to be running after their child. It's disruptive and very rude. Children are never welcome at weddings unless they are specifically invited on the invitation. I don't understand why people cannot accept why children are just not appropriate at certain functions. The rules for child rearing have changed and not for the better. Spend quality time with your child and then you won't feel guilty about hiring a babysitter, and spending a day or evening at an adult function.

Of course Debbie was thinking of taking the baby to the wedding. Who volunteers for 9 hours of flight time with a one-year old just to leave the kid with a sitter during the wedding and reception? If that's the plan, then maybe Debbie should think about what her son would prefer--being off his schedule, cooped up on a plane, watched by a strange sitter or staying home with Dad in familiar surroundings. <BR> <BR>No hostility intended, though. I took my kids a few inappropriate places before I wised up. Live and learn.

There are still families out there that want to celebrate major occasions with all their family present. There are still brides and grooms out there that would be thrilled to have a family members baby with them at their wedding. There are still families whose values are not based on me me me, but rather on us, all of us, very old and very young and everything in between. <BR> <BR>I know - I come from one of those families. I recently went to my cousins wedding where they knew I was bringing my one year old twins and they were thrilled to have all of us fly in for the wedding. I guess I'm just lucky to come from a family like that. <BR>

Your sentiments are well-meant, Janet, but unfortunately this is not a perfect world. YES, I agree that kids ARE part of the family and that it is important for family to be at special events like weddings. HOWEVER, when the child is TOO YOUNG TO UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON, then they are best left at home or with a sitter. Period. <BR> <BR>That baby who stuck his fingers in the wedding cake ruined it for the photos, and it certainly cost several hundred dollars. You can bet that the bride and groom were pretty unhappy! <BR> <BR>My own wedding was disrupted by a friend's 9 month old baby who cried during the ceremony and you can't hear anything else besides him on the video. (Mom didn't want to take him outside because it was too cold!) <BR> <BR>In other words, leave the kid at home!!

Let's think about this . . . <BR>Mom, Dad, and baby on the East Coast in a college area. Cousin and wedding on the West Coast. Could it be that both husband and wife are from the San Francisco area? <BR> <BR>Let's imagine a couple of scenarios here. Her family would probably all but disown her if she flew all that way without bringing the grandbaby! The husband might even have family in the area who would be turning back handsprings to get to watch their grandbaby for the day/evening. <BR> <BR>Debbie didn't ask for our opinions on the wedding. She asked for travel suggestions with a baby. She's trying to be PROACTIVE and avoid problems in transit.

Janet, I come from a loving family similar to yours, where guests of all ages are welcomed with love at ~most~ family events. <BR>the single exception to that is our weddings. we have all had elaborate, evening, black tie weddings, and all of us who had kids happily left the kids at home with sitters. it leaves some time for the adults to drink and dance and socialize. and lets face it, fancy weddings are not child friendly. the kid isn't having any fun all uncomfortable in their dressy clothes, having to try and be quiet and sit still for hours. <BR>

Unless the wedding invitation clearly states Mr. & Mrs. John Doe and baby or family, then the child is not invited and should be left with a babysitter. As for flying with the little tyke, it is stressful enough on adults to fly, why subject a young child to that. AND-the mother will be flying solo with the child cross country. Talk about being a glutton for punishment. How the heck are you going to go to the bathroom with a toddler and all their paraphenilia, not to mention the aggravation it causes to other passengers. I agree with the poster above, why do parents today have to take their kids everywhere even if it is not appropriate Better to leave the child at home instead of disrupting someone's wedding.

Good grief--why did this question, asking ONLY for air travel advice and information about San Francisco turn into such a debate? This is a huge problem on this forum. Stick to the topic and stop taking up space giving advise that isn't solicited. At least Debbie has the sense not to jump in and defend herself. I hope that she is at least getting a great chuckle out of those of you who are giving advise and opinions on a situation that may not even exist.

OH-If you don't like it here go somewhere else. Fodors has made it clear they ain't gonna mess with the boards, so buzzzz off ya witch!

Phew, this subject certainly seem to draw the absolute nastiest of posters -- they seem to want attention and use their poisonous, hate-filled agenda to get it. <BR> <BR>What's frustrating is that there are Debbie's and Debbie's friends out there who genuinely want to have an exchange on the subject (although there's always the unfortunate possibility of yet another G.D.'d troll on this same subject) -- and then people like the last several posters who tell them they're supposed to put up with abuse or go away. <BR> <BR>This is totally turned-around logic, and it's increasingly spoiling the forum. Idiots.