Ha!missypie,
I will now tell my cat sitter to prepare themselves for the schock if they ever have the need to open a closet
or a drawer, except the kitchen is
tidy, but of course nothing will get "lost" where it's tidy!

seetheworld, you have our sympathetic ear
@};-
Did you say to him exactly what you said to us ?
<i>&quot;This will be the the first year we have not done a family trip -- and that's bugging me to no end. I want the DH to lend a sympathetic ear and he's not doing that. I'm having a hard time leaving my empty nest because maybe, just maybe one of the sons will need me for something.&quot;</i>

and maybe add something like &quot;I need your help to get through this.&quot;

R5

Fainaagain, I used to do the exact repack you describe, especially before plane flights. Now because of going &quot;home&quot; to duo states, I've went way too far the other way. I just go with a purse, keys, and my books. This has led to some very interesting ensembles, especially when the winter blows in across the lake in MI.

And for long drive vacations I am apt to underpack now as well.

I clean not because of who would see or any other reason but this. When I come through that door there is enough I have to do before going to work the next day, just in the mail/voice mail/wash/watering plants etc. And also because I like it that way. I always empty the garbage totally and freeze or discard nearly everything perishable from the refrigerator as well.

I too clean like a banshee before I leave--definately b/c I worry what the cat sitter will think but then again there would be nothing worse than coming back from some amazing trip to seeing a messy house. It's bad enough that the pressures of real life come back to haunt us on the flight back home but to find a pile of newspapers under the coffee table or an unmade bed would make me nuts! I always run the dishwasher as we're walking out the door, even if there are only 2 glases in it. Then I worry that it could break and flood the kitchen but my fear of bugs overrides that...

&quot;I'm having a hard time leaving my empty nest because maybe, just maybe one of the sons will need me for something.&quot; - this is the empty nest syndrom we've all gone/will be going through.

I make sure I'd talked to both sons, sent them e-mails with the list of flights, hotels w/phone numbers, itinerary, just in case they &quot;need&quot; me.

But the truth is, they don't need us. We need them. So have a nice vacation, just have a list of phone numbers with you.

R5: I have expressed my feelings about this but in an indirect sort of way. I need to be direct, because I do need his help with this. However, I think he is struggling with the same feelings as well, but he's dealing with it differently -- he wants to go away, the opposite of what I want to do. This is getting tricky - that's why we need to compromise. Thanks for your sympathetic ear, R5 :)

Faina, I love your bluntness - it brings a smile to my face. But this is more than just leaving phone numbers behind. This is not the first time I have traveled without &quot;the kids&quot; - it runs a little deeper than that, I'm afraid.

NO

Gosh, you guys are as bad as me! OWJ - I too worry about the condition of the house while we're away. What if there's a fire? We don't run the dishwasher b/c we turn the water off before we leave. Double checking everything adds another thing to long &quot;to do&quot; list. I've found getting a really early start packing, etc. helps.

Seetheworld - are you the type to forget your problems on vacation? I know I am - which is why I love getting away. Usually all my worries evaporate at the airport. If you are the same way, then maybe you should go. Or maybe go for a shorter time?

Leona, the DH is thinking that Florida's weather might be too unpredictable -- there's hope yet, lol :D

Karens, I am usually quite relaxed when we go away. Well, after we actually get to where we are going, that is (but it seems I'm not the only one).

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings about the topic. Here's to a clean house ~ Cheers ((D))

So glad that someone started this thread...I too want to travel, but am always thrilled to plan the trip, then when the day comes I'm just so exhausted after packing and preparing the house that I hardly can get excited about going!

On another subject...for those of you worried about leaving your house in case of a flood...turn off your washing machine cold and hot water valves. These hoses are under great pressure and should be metal flexes, not rubber hoses. They will break sooner or later and you don't want them to do that while you are gone. Also, you can buy &quot;water detectors&quot; - battery operated devices that SCREECH when water comes in contact with the bottom of the device. Best buck you will ever spend. And believe me, they are SO loud anyone outside your house can hear them. We have them under the water heater, washing machine and under our sinks. And when we leave for an extended period I put one in the kitchen next to the fridge since we have an in-line ice maker that could burst. Better safe than sorry!

We own 2 plumbing companies and I can't tell you how many customers call us in a panic when they return from vacation to find a flooded house!

stw, we don't have children so it's likely I'll never understand the challenges you're now facing but I hope you find the answers you are looking for and wish you peace.

stw, it'll get better- but just follow your instincts about going or not, and stick to them. If the feeling is strong not to go AND it is unusual, do talk to your DH about.

decespedes and JJ5, thanks for your kind words.

The trip has been cancelled and now we are both working on ways to spend some quality time together to work through this rough patch. Taking a vacation isn't always the solution and I think we both realize that now.

Now, as for turning the water off, we <i>never</i> leave for a trip without doing so! :D