What, if I may inquire, is 'American hair' ?? Just more of your ill-informed stereotypes, I would guess ? Have you ever even been to the US ?

He probably has. But I know when Europeans go to the U.S. with all their stereotypes stowed along, they can always find something that "validates" those steretypes.

Yes I’ve been to America – dreadful place full of Yanks, and I never saw a cowboy.

Come on now, “American hair” is a recognised phenomenon, and a little light ribbing does you good.

Here’s a clue….In general when the British, Irish, Aussies, Kiwis etc are ribbing you – it means they like you.

Really the level of thin-skinnedness (is that a word? I think it’s a perfectly cromulent word) from some of the septics on here defies belief.

You say that they have mad hair and the react like you’ve just burned down the White House or mooned Oprah.

I dread to think what would happen to them if they ever actually left the “land of the free” and spoke to people from the rest of the world. They’d probably spontaneously combust just leaving behind a pile of smoking hair and a maple leaf stick-pin smouldering on top of a pair of bright white training shoes.

i do not see how most of the "light ribbing" that goes on here would be offensive in any way, to anyone.

however, is it interesting, humourous or otherwise worth the pixels used to display it...NO. most of it is boring, cliche or just otherwise lacking in cleverness.

we would not like to log onto this board and see a group of people constantly making lame references to the queen....not that anyone would be offended...we would just be bored to death. yes, we all know royalty is silly. would we really want a board full of amateur american comedians saying things like "...and the queen!....what's up with the queen???" or "the money!...what's up with the monopoly money???". "don't even get me started on driving on the left...what's up with that?" i would self ban myself if this is what we saw all over this board.

does anyone really think that references to american hair, white trainers, maple syrup, or overcooked bacon are particularly interesting? nobody is offended but everyone is yawning.

these things are just said to wind people up and americans should realise that. however, there are plenty of interesting and insiteful things that we can say to laugh about our differences without resorting to overcooked bacon, american hair, white shoes, or girls' sports.

hearing these light ribbings must be like getting a haircut and someone says "did you lose the fight with the lawnmower?" you don't quite know how to respond. the wind-up is so stupid that you don't want to give the perpetrator the satisfaction that he wound you up but you also can't bring yourself to stomach a good natured laugh at such trite stupidity....so you just kind of awkwardly grunt and walk away. you think he's an a$$ and he thinks you are humourless and can't take a wind-up. does this accurately describe the two perspectives here? anyone?

It is of my humble opinion that your tireless rhetoric does anyone any good, at all. But there are many people who love to hear themselves talk...The maple-leaf item would most likely belong to a Canadian, btw. Fortunately, on my travels abroad,I've not had the disservice of meeting anyone of your ilk. I can only hope my luck continues to hold. My heritage is English & Scottish by the way, & not that far removed. Suffice it to say, your efforts at humor are severely lacking...

Alright. Bugger the lot of you - I'm off.

I'm sure you'll manage fine.

I'm OK with your burning down the White House. You did it once, and we rebuilt it.

I, however, will not countenance the mooning of Oprah. Have you no decency?

BTW, what's up with the "queen thing"?

Honestly j 999 there’s no point in dealing with these people. All that happens is they pull the usual passive/aggressive cobblers and holier than thou Pharisee act that they have spent years perfecting.

I have been posting on these boards for 10 years now – and where possible I have tried to help – even the bone headed questions that come up time and time again. I like to think I HAVE helped. At least I hope so.

In almost every case when a thread gets off “how do I buy and Oystercard” or “Where is the best tea in London” one of two things happen. Either the old-lady Taliban get humpty and shrill, and start bleating “what has this got to do with travel”, or failing that some berk will come along like a fourth form master and tell all involved “it’s not very big and it’s not very clever”.

Well I’ve had enough. Goodbye.

Oh come on david_west, don't do a hairflip on us.

Fortunately, on my travels abroad,I've not had the disservice of meeting anyone of your ilk

"Of your ilk" means somebody with the same name, as our Scottish friends would tell you.
I'm not surprised that you have not met many from the clan Custardmonster.
BTW, he must be the one responsible for those yellow-footed polar bears on Shetland

I'm bald and it's the last straw in any case.

Too much bollocks in my direction by the two-bob self appointed Hays Office (look it up if you think it applies to you) on here.

I don't need it, and I have to accept that the two-bob and blue rinse have won.

Sorry, you are absolutely forbidden to leave.
Pull yourself together, lad. We need you.
You haven't even had the honour of being chucked out yet. You young chaps have no stamina.
How many reincarnations have you had, may I ask?

He's not going anywhere, he's already said he's leaving 3 times today...a bit like a virus, non ?

I find David West's writing both humorous and interesting, and would find this board a more boring place without him. In fact, and being a private person, I do not make this admission easily, I sometime search on his name just to see what he's on about lately. I do find some of you others a bit priggish.

I certainly am going and it’s knobbers like San Paris above that are the reason. He calls me a virus – well old boy you must be the virus that causes trench-cock.

I have never had a re-incarnation, I have never been banned, and I have always posted under my own real name – with email attached. In other words I came here to try to help and to join in and without an agenda (unlike the entrail above).

While growths like San Paris have the whip hand – there is no point in being here. This is the only thread I’m posting on, and only until it dies it’s natural death (or more likely – is pulled by the powers that be).

Well done San Paris. Truly a master cock-chafer at work and I salute you.

I will be the first to admit I do not always 'get' English humour. Although I love "Are You Being Served ?", "Monty Python" & the like...the constant attacks on Americans are somewhat tiresome, unoriginal & stereotypical. I am far from being politically correct, but give it a rest, or choose a different target on once in awhile.

I have chosen a different target - you.

If you want to carry this on (and frankly I doubt you've got the alberts for it) my email is in my name. Feel free.

Oh, he makes fun of the Scots all the time, doesn't he Sheila?

why football?
Just because the U.S team didn't win
does not make it boring....
Why so many in the world play it?
Because is a sport, a friednship-athletic competition , not a money making media-show-hollywood-drugs-sex game.
Plus, is nice to see something else than war.. and killings on the tv. for once.

They're as bad. Tell 'em they're a bit too fond of purple tin and it's the Highland bloody clearances all over again to judge from the reaction.

Anyway i'm talking my Duke of Cumberland act elsewhere.