Not all wait staff in the U.S. are underpaid. In California they receive minimum wage. I am still expected to tip 15-20% though.

I tip in restaurants in the Netherlands. I round the bill up to a nice round figure. It never results in a tip of more than 10%, and is only that high if we have had a really good evening.
Likewise in cafés I round up if paying cash, or leave a small amount in cash, if I pay with my debit card, if I have had more than just a coffee.
We tend not to eat out much when in Spain, so I can't say whether we leave a tip or not. Probably we do, out of habit.
Which is what OP's wife is doing.

Dukey - maybe it is hard for an American to understand, but there are actually places where appreciation can be effectively - and appropriately - expressed without the use of money.

But don't touch them Dukey.

IMHO nothing says "thank you" like money!

adrienne, that comment shows a lack of understanding about cultures other than where the dollar is king. What says thank you is dealing pleasantly with people who serve you, not having them running about unnecessarily, understanding that they can't bring your food until the kitchen provides it and telling them that you've enjoyed the food and their service.

Then you leave a tip if it's merited in line with local custom. All that says thank you.

>>. What says thank you is dealing pleasantly with people who serve you, not having them running about unnecessarily, understanding that they can't bring your food until the kitchen provides it and telling them that you've enjoyed the food and their service.<<

That's a lot of work for the customer. I think I should get a tip for doing all that.

Adrienne: you need to use a smiley face . . . Your irony was missed again (or was it sarcasm the 2nd time ;) )

And, in North America where larger tips are expected, we are just subsidizing the restaurant owner who then gets away with paying a pathetic wage!

Rubicund - since I do not earn money outside the US, why would I need to care about other cultures? I'd rather have the money than the thank you so I can continue traveling. That's my preference and no one should say that what I want shows a lack understanding about other cultures. This has nothing to do with other cultures and only has to do with me and what I want for myself. Others may prefer the thank you to the money and that's their right.

When eating in restaurants I state all my needs up front (water no ice, dressing on the side, crispy bacon, well done scrambled eggs to name a few and I do not make the waiter name the salad dressings for the 4th time as I pay attention the first time; show great understanding when waitstaff are rushed off their feet and they depend on the kitchen to put up the food. And I say thank you and tip appropriately.

"why would I need to care about other cultures"

gosh, not really sure why you are traveling then ;-)

Adrienne

Haven't you sent the new Fodors forum, may be worth sticking to it.

Lounge2 : for those with a sense of humour.

IMHO the reason some americans continue to tip at the rate they expect at home is that is just feels WRONG (as in cheap and taking advantage of people) not to do so.

I recognize that the customs are different in other places - but many of us have been mortified when eating with cheap tippers in the US (and gone behind their backs to leave the proper amount) that is has become a reflex.

I don't think anyone is doing it to make themselves appear to be wealthy or "big shots" - how can leaving a couple of extra euros do that? Those people are more likely to be wearing very expensive jewelry or ultra watches - and making a big deal about what their jobs are - or hat cars they drive - not worry about tipping.

I was thrown off Lounge2 before I joined.

"as in cheap and taking advantage of people) not to do so."

In Charleston recently I had a real mathematical issue. Theoretical infinity is something that has always been a moot point. What's even more fun is considering 15% of zero. Apparently in posh Charleston B&Bs the answer is $10.

Our breakfast was including in the price of the room. The hotel had the wonderful system of billing us for breakfast at the table, asking us to sign for the bill (with the usual huge gap for tip) only for us to be told that the amount would be deducted from the final bill on check out. The amount was deducted but not the tip.

Cheap way of getting a tip.

Feed the troll. The usual nonsense that gets written whenever anyone posts 'tipping' in the topic.

Instead, let's discuss what to do when the food you are served is NOT satisfactory. The most vocal about tipping are usually Brits. So come on Brits tell us what you do when the food sucks. Get beyond not tipping.

Here is my response. 1. Don't eat it. If the food is cold or over-cooked (common in UK), it's supposed to be a sirlion steak but it's only a 1/4 inch thick, it looks like it came out of a can, etc. etc. Just don't eat it.

2. Call your waiter back and say it is unacceptable. Do NOT say YOU are SORRY, a common Brit mistake. Do not say nothing, the other common Brit mistake. Tell the waiter to take it away.

3. Either order something else or decide to leave. Personally, if the first thing they brought wasn't edible I don't hold out much hope for ordering something else, so I usually leave unless it was the dessert course that was unacceptable.

4. Do not pay for what you did not eat. If they insist on putting it on the bill simply deduct it from your payment. Offer to give them your name and address if they wish to pursue payment through the courts. This is your LEGAL right to do this (In the UK, not talking about anywhere else). You do NOT have to pay and then take them to court, you can refuse to pay and let them take you to court. But you must give them your name and address and show proof of identity, not just walk out without paying. You must also pay for everything else you did accept.

Remember, the Polis can arrest you for theft if you do a runner without paying but they cannot arrest you for refusing to pay for something you refused to eat. They will not get in the middle of that argument as long as you have given your contact information to the restaurant.

Try that a few times in some of the numerous under par UK restaurants that get away with serving rubbish.

For non-Brits, what do you do in your home country when food is not acceptable? Pay and say nothing? Pay but not tip? (common in N. America) Refuse to pay?

Great tips.

SoJo

I read one of your posts today that made you appear well informed and balanced.

The post above returns you to the lunatic fringe.

I think there is making of a new reality show-You Need Not Be A Mohel To Know About Tips.

If the foOd is no good, then do not tip. Pay the bill and leave. The outcome will be no more than a memory of a poor meal, and a determination not to eat there again. There are several bars in Venice that we will not return to because of poor service or poor food or mean spritzes.

But, if you refuse to pay, then you will leave in a state of anger, possibly humiliation, and a source of embarrassment to other patrons. No meal is so bad as to warrant that outcome.

Sojourne's advice is really very dumb, coming as it does from a typist in a garret in Ottowa.

"If the foOd is no good, then do not tip." -- Why punish the server for a problem that is probably outside of his/her control? In cultures where tipping is appropriate, the tip is for service, not for the quality of that which is served.