It's alright if ....
 

I sense a high degree of anxiety in many of the questions posted here, especially from people making their first trip abroad. The experienced travellers seem to have a more relaxed approach (that's you, Ira).

Can I propose that we draw up a list together of the things that it is alright to do (or not do). One of the best pieces of advice is always to assume that you will go again, and that therefore you don't have to rush around to see all the sights, and lots of countries.

To get the ball rolling, can I suggest the following:

It's alright to go on an organised tour for your first trip. That way you will learn what a country is like without having to make all the individual arrangements.

It's alright not to search the internet for the lowest possible price. It's more important to have an enjoyable, less stressful, experience when you hire a car or book a flight.

Nobody ever starved while on holiday in a developed country. It may not be the food you are used to, but you are bound to find something you like

Well, in a way, I'd disagree that it's "alright to go on an organised tour for your first trip." My entire attitude to travel has been driven by the memory of the sheer fun of organising the travel myself, and the sheer confusion of the different noises and smells from the moment I navigated myself onto French soil. No organised trip could possibly have had the same effect.

I'd suggest there's a deeper alright, which picks up on chartley's third point:

Practically nothing that can go wrong on holiday in a developed country will do you more damage than you'd experience at home. You won't starve on holiday, more physical assaults are carried out on the streets of your home town thgan any toursit place you're likely to visit, and passports and credit cards can all be replaced.

And no-one could give a back copy of Women's Wear Daily what you're wearing.

I had an aunt who went on many tours all over Europe & wouldn't go any other way. If that's your comfort level, use a tour. Absolutely fine to do.

It's most important to have comfortable walking shoes that have been broken in. Nothing can ruin a day's sightseeing faster than aching feet.

It's alright to visit Paris and not visit the Louvre; it's alright to visit the Louvre and not visit the Mona Lisa.

Organized tours -
I think an organized tour is fine for a 1st trip. Or a 2nd trip. Or a 3rd trip. IF that is what makes someone comfortable traveling.

My MIL has done ALL her trips that way and she is perfectly happy to have someone else make all the arrangements and decisions. The only time she didn't do an organized tour was to Egypt - and I arranged everything for her!

It's not my style. I have only done 1 organized tour in my life and the only reason it worked for me is because I was with a group of people (expats from Cairo) and we all knew each other, knew each other's kids, etc. So, when one man suddenly became very ill and had to be med-evac'd out of the country and his wife felt she needed to go with him for a couple of days......the rest of us "moms" pitched in and took care of their 3 daughters so that the daughters could continue to have fun with their friends and not worry too much about their dad.

Searching for low fares -
I search for my timetable first, then search for a reasonable fare - adjusting the timing if needed. To me, convenience is more important than saving a little money. Also - my time is valuable .....and spending hours trying to save a little money is not worth it to me.

Money/costs -
Travelling is expensive. Period. Be aware of the exchange rates, save money where it makes sense, but don't obsess about it.

As I recently stated on an A&ME post - in 5 years, will you be kicking yourself for going all the way to Egypt and cruising the Nile but NOT spending the extra couple of hundred to see Abu Simble?

Know what is important to YOU -
For us,
(1) We would rather spend a little more on a hotel to be in the center of town, close to the major sites/attractions. We don't want to HAVE to ride a bus or metro everywhere we want to go. We want to be able to walk most places.
(2) We enjoy good food and wine - so we are willing to pay for good restaurants. It's worth it to us. It's wasted on my MIL.
(3) We have a "must see" list and a "would be nice" list. As long as we get thru the "must see" things - we leave happy.

It's alright if you don't speak the local language. In tourist areas in Europe, many people will understand at least a little English and even when they don't, it's surprising how far you can get with with signs and gestures. A few key phrases, such as please and thank you are however, always appreciated.

Hi C,

>things that it is alright to do

It is all right to:

Visit 3 major venues in 3 weeks, even though it is possible to fit in 17. Europe will still be there your next visit.

Choose one hotel over another and not bother to visit the one you decided against.

Ditto restaurants.

To visit Paris and not go up the Eiffel Tower.

To visit Italy and not go to Rome.

To go to "touristy" places - there are reasons why tourists go there.

To buy 2cl tickets on trains.

To drink the water - mostly.

To share a first course or a desert.

It is NOT all right to:

To wear beach wear for dinner at a restaurant that has tablecloths.

To speak loudly in houses of worship, museums, art galleries, etc. Use your indoor voice.

To stand in doorways while talking to your friends.

All right, already. :)

((I))

It is all right to visit France but not go to Paris.

It is all right to travel to a new location every other day if you know that is the way you like to travel.

It is all right to spend your entire vacation without ever going to a major tourist site or museum if you don't want to see one.

It is all right to ask about what people wear in a place you have never visited, just as it is all right to ask what your friends are wearing to that party tonight. (Just be prepared that when you ask here, some people will misinterpret your desire to know and will give you a hard time.)

It is all right to change your mind mid-course about what you want to do.

It is all right to eat the foods you prefer and to drink the drinks you prefer while on vacation, even if they are things you could get at home.

There is no wrong way to have a good time. It is best, however, to know what will enable you to have that good time, so I recommend listening to all the advice you can and weighing its usefulness to you.

In short, it is all right to do what you enjoy doing and not what everyone else tells you you must do.

>..it is all right to do what you enjoy doing and not what everyone else tells you you must do.

Except for wearing shorts and tank tops at dinner in decent restaurants and talking loudly - that's rude - and having cabernet sauvignon with shellfish - that's awful.

It's alright if you wear what you find comfortable, rather than what the locals wear and it's alright if you look like a tourist.

It's alright (usually!--be prepared for sometimes a snide or condescending response) to ask any (even seemingly inane or obvious) questions here; isn't that what this forum is for? It's been such a help to me so far.

It's all right, not alright.

Alright is all right according to the OED (in both senses).

to echo Ira...

As long as it's not rude, it's all all right.

g.

Alright looks horrible and my spell-checker doesn't like it, so there!

If you are polite and take care not to annoy or inconvenience the busy locals, then minor faux pas are forgiven.
It is not all right to feel that you can behave like a boor because "they want my money".

What's wrong with alright? Sounds alright to me.

OK, you're right alright doesn't look as good as all right!

Alright is in my dictionary too - but it says it "non standard". So that's all right (or alright) ;)

Gosh, the OED *does* say "alright" is okay (but often considered erroneous), though the only writer of note they quote spelling it that way in my "Shorter OED" is Tom Stoppard.

We've already (!) had disagreements on what is all right. I would suggest that everything legal is all right, including rudeness and inappropriate attire, providing you are willing to pay the price. The cigar puffing plutocrat wouldn't be getting his travel dollars' worth if he wasn't browbeating some toady, then contemptuously over-tipping.

We might consider his behavior barbarous, in which case I guess we could snub him -- not that he'd care. I'd like to be able to say "Your right to wear a wife-beater and shorts on a hot day in Rome ends when it enters my vision." (Apologies to Fran Liebowitz.) But of course I have no such authority . . .

If it's good enough for Tom Stoppard, it is good enough for me. I think I will switch now. Alright.

It's alright to:

Wear pants in churches if you are a woman.

Not feel stupid to prefering a purse to a moneybelt.

Wear jeans almost anywhere if you are young and don't care about nice restaurants.

Wear jeans if you are older as long as you also bring another pair of pants for the nice restaurants.

Take the bus tour (or boat tour) for your first, especially jetlagged day.

Nap during the day no matter what your age or activity level!

It's alright to not especially love the Louvre or to much prefer the Musee d'Orsay.

It's alright to care about what you wear and how you look in your travel photos and to be horrified at advice to wear your oldest clothes and just throw them away.

It's alright to talk politics, maybe more so than here in the States.

And finally - it's alright to check this website on a daily basis to get your quick fix of all things Europe!

getting away from the all right/alright, I'm breaking the rules and using "okay."

It's okay to not have a tight schedule or planned itinerary for every moment. it is acceptable if to plan out each day--whatever makes you more comfortable.

Most hotels will be in a centralized area, unless you want to be in a certain place for ease of retaurants/nightlife--most neighborhoods are the "best."

You probably won't get to each place you have planned, it's okay--you will go back.

Your trip abroad will probably not be the only one you take. Setting yourself up for the "trip of a lifetime" is likely to lead to disappointment.

The exchange rate is what it is good or bad, it's okay not to get too hung up on it--you are on vacation and can travel within your budget regardless of the exchange rate.

It is okay to drive rather than train everywhere (not in major cities), just know how to drive a stick shift or be prepared to pay a lot for automatic. And use mappy, google maps, etc. to map out your directions and print them ahead of time. get a road map too so you can change your mind.

It is okay not to like a city/country/place where you went on vacation, even if it seems everyone else loves it. We all have different tastes.

It is okay to change your mind--if you have 3 cities planned and like where you are or don't like one of the destinations--leave and go back early to the place you like or extend your stay and forgo the next place--you can always go back another time.

It's okay to sit and drink wine all day in a cafe instead of trekking all over town. You ARE on vacation--relax!

It's okay to skip the major cities (I know, it was already said).

It's okay to wear whatever you want, think you look good in, are comfortable in--they sell the same clothes in Europe that they sell in the US and Canada, you are on vacation, not in a fashion show--no one cares or is probably paying attention.

It's okay to go back to a city/country more than once (this one is hard for me), you will never see everything, for the most part.

No vacation is completely perfect, it's okay--it is an experience either way.

It's okay to ask questions, even if they are inane--everyone has an opinion and they love to share it here, even if it doesn't come out in the nicest of ways.

>Alright is all right according to the OED (in both senses).

Nonsense. That's just pandering to the semiliterate, ignorant and lazy rabble.

How you can start out praising someone as being relaxed and experienced, and THEN you say:

Can I propose that we draw up a list together of the <b>things that it is alright to do (or not)</b>

[emphasis mine, obviously]

Everything is &quot;alright to do&quot; and thinking there needs to be &quot;permission&quot; is about as unrelaxed as you can get.

It's all right if you fail to make the most productive possible use of your time -- if you dawdle, procrastinate, piddle around, forget to do a Must Do -- as long as you're open to the experience of being there and use your indoor voice.

It's all right to spell words as you wish on travel forums, and make typos without agonizing, as long as you're communicating helpfully. Give your inner third grade teacher a rest.

I only wish I were as semiliterate, ignorant and lazy as Tom Stoppard.

stokebailey wrote: &quot;It's all right to spell words as you wish on travel forums&quot;

... so long as you recognise that it pisses some people off and deflects others from grasping the meaning of what you say, and can lead to a person who might just have that nugget of information you seek not responding to your question.

It is NOT all right to visit France and NOT eat eclairs.

It's OK to take a tour. I did my first time. Part of the reason is confidence...you can't always convince people to be confident and do it on their own, sometimes confidence comes with experience.

It's OK to not like the Mona Lisa, it's OK to not go up the Eiffel tower. Do more of what you want to do, and a bit less of the commonly accepted 'must-sees'.

Sometimes more is less. You may try to fit in that extra museum or two in a day because it's on your list, rush around to do so...and months later when you look back on your trip you may find the best memories could be of sitting at a cafe on a beautiful summer day enjoying just 'being there'. Aim for more 'being there' moments.

There is a point where clothes DO matter. You'd love to visit a certain church, they'd love you to ditch that short skirt and may not let you in. I remember pulling over outside Konya in Turkey (conservative) so that women in our group could put on long pants. Similarly, you may or may not get treated differently based on how you look...I prefer not to increase the odds, and dress unobtrusively.

Have a healthy attitude to safety. Don't always believe the &quot;pickpockets are everywhere&quot; doomsayers, but still, in a calm manner, be aware of your surroundings, how you look to any potential thief, and have your backup plan set.

Culture...whether you are going to Canada or Ghana, the culture will NOT be the same. Know this, if you can, make an effort to find out more before going, and while there..observe and learn. If people eat at 8PM, why not adapt?
Respect where you are going.

Are you a tourist or a traveller? Be both, and realize that the later can be the more rewarding. Be open for new experiences and growth. Come back from a trip a little bit changed.

And, in the same vein, you are &quot;there&quot;, not &quot;here&quot;. So enjoy &quot;there&quot; and don't compare it back to &quot;here&quot;. If you want everything like at home....

And...trust Fodor's, there are some wise people here.

Is it okay or OK? Maybe it's neither here nor there....

Padraig,
Knowing how never to offend anyone would be a feat indeed. If someone didn't respond because I spelled a word differently, well, I'd just have to live with that.

It is all right to split up with your travel partner if you would rather shop while s/he does something more culturally advanced.

It's your vacation - so you should do it the way YOU want. If you don;t like - or have time for - planning and prefer to have someone decide for you where to go and what to do - fine. It's better than not traveling at all.

(Although I don;t think this has anything to do with a 1st or a 10th trip to somewhere - just your style of travel.)

Do have TWO paris of sturdy broken in waterproofed broken shoes since it WILL rain during your trip - and walking 10 miles in wet shoes is no fun.

Be sure you have a sturdy folding umbrella.

Do NOT eat at any restaurant adjacent to a tourist attraction that had menus in 12 languages plus pictures. The food will be expensive and poor.

Recognize that many things will be done differently than at home - that's why you're going. It won;t kill you (except for a food allergy - then you need a special card).

Knowing only English is understandable - but you will do much better if you spend 30 minutes to learn a few basic polite phrases in the languages of the country you will visit.

No matter how many people tell horror stories about crime almost every tourist area in europe is just as safe - if not safer - than your home town (unless you wander down dark alleys alone at 3 am).

You will have minor problems.

You will overcome them - unless you're incredibly picky (in which case you probably shouldn't leave home).

You will laugh about them after the trip.

Don't follow in the steps of aposter, make your first trip your own, for you'll have your memories but do read up on where you are going. to know what you want to see.

It is all right to stay in the suburbs instead of in the city, and take the fast transportation into the city. (i.e. Mestre/Venice)

The only thing I would say is all right, is to do what you really would like and if possible always using some common sense.
Everything is relative, for instance saying it is all right to go to France and not go to Paris,...if you have not been before in Paris...&gt;&gt;??? I would add that it does not make any sense to me...

It's ok to wear the big white sneakers, if that's what most comfortable for you! Just as long as you don't wear them to a fancy restaurant or so. Wear what you want, within reason, though keep the lengths conservative, just in case.

I totally disagree about shopping air fares. When you can save $200-500/each, you can shop like the dickens for a much nicer hotel and take a taxi to/from the airport.

I would add, however, that three months ahead is not advance planning. A year and three months is better. Unless you've got lots of experience.

I don't understand the &quot;can I wear?&quot; questions. If that's what you wear all over at home, why worry? Anyone think the responses have changed anyone's packing plans? You'll see anything and everything on others, everywhere.

It is possible to be comfortable, even more so, in clothing/shoes other than in jeans and white sneakers, and look a lot nicer. My rules of packing are fabric, fit, flattering.

There ARE pickpockets everywhere. And, if you take simple precautions, they will target others who haven't, rather than you.

I'm all for economizing, but it's just so silly to &quot;save&quot; a few dollars and not do something you'd really like to do while you're there.

If you're asking about air conditioning for the warmer months, you'll probably be relieved to have booked a place that has it and sorry if you don't.

A good restaurant guide is much better for finding places appealing to you than &quot;name your favorites&quot; in a large city. Besides, I think everything turns on what you order.

There's nothing wrong with any organized tour, even though they may be restrictive and not the best value for the dollar. And, they're just so much more efficient.

That &quot;pack tattered underwear and toss it as you go&quot; tip is the most ridiculous &quot;tip&quot; I've ever heard (not to mention those who offer it as an original idea). Can you imagine waste baskets in hotel rooms all over Europe with dirty underwear left for the maids?

It's just fine to run yourself ragged. And, otherwise do whatever you please. You'll adjust as you go.

I like what everyone has written here, prolly some are just variations of this and that.. haha

I think its alright to plan for your trip, maybe one year in advance or one day in advance, and plan it to the smallest details, but just let it go if things don't go the way as u planned, because most importantly, it's NOT alright not to enjoy yourself, which basically should be what travelling is about yeah?

I think I do plan quite a lot BEFORE I go.. but once on it.. just go with the flow.. haha..