Forget what your partner wants. Trust me on this.
It’s a curious custom that couples get to celebrate an already huge festivity like their nuptials with a vacation. The recently wed always come back from a honeymoon talking of how they found eternal bliss and the real meaning of relaxation while away. If you ask me, a single person, it sounds too good to be true. Now, you’re probably wondering why this particular writer is going on about honeymoons, and well, it’s because I found paradise. The ubiquitous paradise where people go away to escape together, and I found it!
White sand beaches, hammocks rocking in the soft ocean breeze, the slow pace of island life: on a remote island of the Bahamas lies the perfect private getaway, The Cove, Eleuthera, an intimate, 57-room resort.
As I dipped my toes in the turquoise water and enjoyed room-service from the comfort of my plush white-linen bed accompanied by seven pillows (all for myself, natch), I knew that when people talked about enjoying their honeymoon in paradise, they were really talking about the Bahamas.
People say love is the most beautiful thing in the world, but as someone who isn’t currently experiencing that, I’d say it was this view.
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I was given the first glimpse of Bahamian lovers’ paradise as I crossed over The Glass Window Bridge on the way to my accommodations at The Cove, Eleuthera. The small, one-way bridge, often referred to as the narrowest place on Earth, functions as a great viewpoint to take in the contrast of the tumultuous, dark blue Atlantic Ocean waters on one side of the island and the calm, crystal clear turquoise Caribbean Sea on the other. People say love is the most beautiful thing in the world, but as someone who isn’t currently experiencing that, I’d say it was this view. But I’m assuming that adding joyous matrimony to the mix means anyone could die happy after crossing this bridge and viewing two completely different colors of water at the same time. Try it and let me know.
The 40-acre resort known as The Cove Eleuthera is a Garden of Eden filled with green grass, palm trees, and swaying hammocks that all come with views of the extremely serene Caribbean Sea. The grounds are made for endless strolls to be enjoyed hand-in-hand with your newly chosen life partner. Whether it’s a morning promenade on one of the two white-sand beaches or a quick stargazing stroll, there is nothing like the tranquil silence of paradise located on a remote island to remind you that the person beside you will forever be by your side for better or for worse… And if you just got married, it’s time to face never being alone again while you’re relaxed in the serene Bahamas instead of the stressful hustle and bustle of normal life.
Married people get more snacks than single people. I’m convinced it’s a fact.
After exploring the property, the best thing to do is hop in one of The Cove’s many hammocks that swing among the ocean breeze. As the perfect size for two, they are a great place to snuggle up for a nap. Or, if you’re napping solo, you can visualize the literal gaping void in your life. It’s roomy! But really, what a better way to begin your wedded life of never sleeping alone than mixing it up outdoors! Honeymoons are all about bliss, so maximize the fact that the breeze will probably drown out their potential snoring. Plus, the resort throws a Hammock Happy Hour every Wednesday and Friday, with every two drinks guaranteeing a complimentary snack box. Married people get more snacks than single people. I’m convinced it’s a fact.
Equally fun is taking a nap in your room. The Cove offers suites, cottages, or villas all fitted with the most comfortable bed you will ever sleep on. If I could have fit that mattress in my luggage I would. Fresh white linen, a plush mattress, and more pillows than you could ever need (even in a pillow fight) make the 200 feet or so trek from bed to beach a lot harder than you would imagine. Living by relaxed island time in the most simple yet luxurious beds got me thinking about why I was here only on a short trip and not as a full-on expat. If a hotel room can make you want to change citizenship, then you will want to make sure your life partner is there to either talk you down or take the leap with you! Now that you’re saddled with another person (and their wants, dreams, and desires), you’ll have to decide together if you want to flee their non-tropical home forever. Me, I’ll do what I want.
Nothing screams singledom in the world of a romantically secluded, tropical paradise more than being alone at the Pink Sand Beach on Harbour Island. The miles of glistening light pink sand against the turquoise Caribbean waters almost made me wish I wasn’t single. With its seductive hazy blush over the horizon, the Bahamas is built for romance. I almost fell in love with the stranger who set their towel up next to me (but balked when I saw the reading choice).
For added boosts of romance, the Bahamian Islands offer natural aphrodisiacs aplenty. For a mood lift, try sampling the local delicacy, conch. Prepared raw, cooked, or fried, it is served in a variety of dishes across the islands. Spend an afternoon diving to the depths of the seafloor to catch them for a delicious snack. Then knock back a Bahama Mama or Goombay Smash while watching the sun set over the spotless Caribbean Sea—a surefire way to put some butterflies in your stomach as you look at your new spouse, or make you drunkenly nauseated by the idea of commitment if you’re alone.
The Bahamas was built for that till-death-do-us-part type of love. But if you do go while single, you won’t regret it. After all, who’s a better boyfriend for me than myself? I steal all the pillows.