<BR>Happy Waiter - We are the owners of a very popular, upscale restaurant in San Francisco. It's pompous idiots like you that ruin it for your employers and co-workers. Visine in ice tea - I'd love to catch you doing that in our resaurant, not only would you be out of a good job, but you'd be using that 20% to pay your attorney's fees.<BR><BR>Our customers, both regular and occasional, are our life's blood, and we need and respect them all. Just as we need and respect good servers. <BR><BR>Also judging by the times of your posts, evening hours, you must be working the luncheon crowd. <BR><BR>You are not a Happy Waiter, you are a very unhappy person, who feels that you are in a demeaning position of serving and catering to others. If you feel such contempt for those that you are serving, I suggest for your sake, as well as their's, that you find another livelihood. <BR><BR>I'm sure that your hatred and condescending attitude is evident to some of your patrons, and that you are very successful in intimidating them into leaving a larger tip.<BR><BR>By the way Happy Waiter, I am beyond your intimidation, so respond anyway that you like, I can guarantee you that I will be ignoring it.<BR><BR>Visine indeed, you are not only risking someone's life, but your employeer's livelihood as well.<BR>You are nothing more than a criminal.<BR>

Dear “Glad You Don’t Work For Me,”<BR><BR>Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah…. I am glad I don’t work for you either. And I am sure that with the attitude you give off – acting like Mrs. Big-Time-Restaurant-Owner – you don’t have many great workers working for you anyway. <BR><BR>I work for a great boss, who is a lot of fun. Believe me, if “Mr. Food” was a-comin’, and my boss knew about him in advance; he probably wouldn’t even seat him in our establishment. We serve people whom some might consider the upper echelon. I’m sure you would know nothing about that in your cheesy dump. <BR><BR>Go back to your hamburger stand and serve up some fresh ground cow. Better yet, make it some bull – we need a little less of THAT around here.<BR><BR>Ooooppsss – Don’t get your claw caught in the meat grinder!<BR><BR>HAHAHAHAHAHAHA<BR><BR>tHe hApPy wAiTeR<BR><BR>PS – Sorry the “Help Wanted” sign has been hanging in your greasy window for so long.<BR><BR>laaaa laaaa laaa la laaaaa laa la la<BR>

That Happy Waiter guy has some real deep emotional problems, n'est ce pas?<BR><BR>He reminds me of the reason my grandfather wouldn't eat at restaurants: "How do you know the guy serving you isn't an ax murderer?"<BR><BR>The true meaning of that was never clear to me until I read Happy Waiter's posts.

Your grandfather is just a kooky as our happy waiter here. There can't be that many ax murderers around to avoid all restaurants. And when was the last time an ax murderer acted out in a retaurant? You never know if the waiter is a hero either do you?

The ax-murderer thing was a joke, you freakin' idiot.

Yeah freud, so was my response!

I don't care if you're a waiter at Alain Ducasse, you're still a waiter and your job is to serve me. There's nothing worse than a pompous waiter unless of course it's the pompous sales clerk at some chi-chi store who couldn't afford to buy her socks there.

UNhappy Waiter... My but you are perceptive, or think that you are. You can tell the gender of a post writer, merely by reading it, ie: (Mrs.) Glad You Arent' Working For Me. I read that <BR>post, but not having your insights and abilities, Out of curiousity, I re-read that post, and for the life of me, I couldn't decide if the poster was male or female. Never make snap decisions like that, it could get you into a lot trouble, but my guess would be that you have already found that out for yourself.<BR><BR>Try being Happy, it makes life so much easier.

Happy Waiter, OK, you have convienced me to always tip at least 20%. If I ever eat at a $3.00 Las Vegas buffet (highly implausible), I promise that I will tip YOU, 20 or 25% -- IF you promise not to poison my iced tea.

Hey H-Waiter, you crack me up!

Well, xx (you freakin' idiot), if that's your idea of funny, I suggest you don't give up your day job (if you have one).

What happened to Mr. Food? Sounds like after his Investment Banking (ie, bank teller) cover was exposed due to his lack of basic math skills, he was unable to respond. Maybe he's working on some new math formula to bring a $125 bill to a tip of $2.50 and stating that he's tipping 12% (pre-tax, of course). <BR>

Still here, sorry nI can't monitor this post 24/7, I do have a job and onlt get on occasionally for a break. Sorry to disappoint that I am not a tellar though there is nothing wrong with that. I was merely presenting a description of myself to show the high contrast with the un"happy waiter"'s description. I do stand by way of tipping but no I don't calculate everything to the penny, I do just like everyone else and estimate in my head usually rounding up. As for my mistake about the $15 tip on the $50 bill, give me a break, I was typing fast after a very long meeting and it was 6pm, I had been at work for 11 hours already that day. I apologize. The Happy Waiter I see has yet to apologize for any of his remarks, I'm sure he has no remorse adn is probably a college drop out who is bitter he can't get a better job so he gets back at people by being nasty and doing highly illegal deeds. Its people like that who think we owe them something that give an otherwise good service industry a bad name.<BR><BR>As for the original question, I have yet to see a response from someone who works in a true buffet restaurant. Anyone out there who can give us some insight into what the proper guidelines for tipping in this establishment would be. Are you guys held to the same standard as a regular server? Are you taxed on assumed income including tips of 15% or is it less? Because buffet servers receive smaller tips, are they paid more?

Well, Well, Well,<BR><BR>If Mr. Food hasn’t suddenly reappeared from hiding under the pink polka-dot shirt at the table in the Vegas all-night buffet. Did you calculate to the penny what to leave your server after eating out of the trough for 24/7? We know what you really do and we all agree that an investment banker you are NOT. You can’t even spell, let alone win an argument. I’m sorry I haven’t been here yet today. I was busy counting all of my money from an excellent night of tips. I love my customers. When I finish the master’s degree I am currently working on in collage, I wonder if my chosen career will pay as well as this one does. I guess the hours will be better. {Yes, I know you are all dying to know what school I attend so that you can pinpoint my town. HAHAHAHA}<BR><BR>To the bubbly, “Happy Person,”<BR>When I addressed the “Mrs. Big-Time-Restaurant-Owner,” you are correct, I did assume it was a woman. I am sorry that “for the life of you,” you couldn’t tell the gender of that writer. Well sistah, that is why I make the kind of money I do and you are so miserable and picking your nose at the buffet line. You see, I originally wrote, “Mr. Big-Time Restaurant Owner,” but then went back and changed Mr. to Mrs. before submitting my post. It was obvious that the person who was addressing me was a b!tch in the true sense of the word. I do give you credit for reading my post so carefully; however you were wrong to assume my off-the-cuff discretion.<BR><BR>I hope that you all enjoy your encounters at the buffets, restaurants, and cafeterias that you attend. It is not wrong to leave a small amount, or even nothing at all if you receive poor service. Hey, please let the management and the server know of your displeasure. But if you eat at a restaurant that prides itself in fine food and service (such as where I work and how I perform), you would not be disappointed and probably leave me 20%-30% of your tab. And I thank you from the bottom of my heart.<BR><BR>If you are going to come to my table and act like Mr./Mrs. Bigshot and leave me a penny for my exceptional service… well let’s just say that I can “get the red out.”<BR><BR>Have to go make a deposit. I don’t want to leave this much cash lying around the house. Mr. Food might come in and steel it so he can sit his big fat @ss down at another buffet for another 24/7.<BR><BR>Cheers!<BR><BR>tHe hApPy WaItEr<BR><BR>

Happy Waiter,<BR>A Masters Degree in Collage? Is your BA in fingerpainting?

The Gay Waiter posted:<BR><BR>&gt;"You can’t even spell, let alone win an argument"<BR><BR>then went on with this:<BR><BR>&gt;"Mr. Food might come in and steel it so he can ..."<BR><BR>I wonder what "collage" he's attending. The Decoupage Academy?

Way To Go, Hertz!<BR><BR>Not only did you find my spelling error, but you were also right-on about my sexual identity. You must be, or have been, a waiter/waitress too! {Curious to know which town, etc. – but understand discretion is a must here.} Wishing you the very best – as YOU seem to be the brightest!<BR><BR>tHe hApPy wAiTeR<BR>

I don't see where I referenced anyone's sexual identity at all, as if it would be any of my business. Where did you read into that, Comical Waiter?

Why are we paying so much attention to Happy Waiter? Apparently all he wants to do is out himself on Fodors and insult everyone else. He is an illiterate wannabe. He is working on his Masters, yet doesn't know what he wants to be when he grows up.<BR><BR>I don't think that his degree is in finger paninting - he would eat the paint before he finished his project.<BR><BR>By the way HW, you really do have a problem with sexual identity ... you called me Sistah - another wrong assumption. Or can't you tell boys from girls??????<BR><BR><BR>Be careful on the way to the bank, that bag of pennies must be awfully heavy.<BR><BR>

Happy Whatever...<BR><BR>Oh yeah, we are all dying to know what city you live in ...RIGHT. If we did by some miracle figure it out, we would immediately know who you are, and in what restaurant you have tried to poison your customers.<BR><BR>Using our investigative powers, we know that you live in a city/town, with a 'collage', a restaurant and a bank. Let us know when we are getting close. <BR>I know that I won't be able to sleep until I figure it out.<BR><BR>

message: happy waiter<BR><BR>Don't count on that masters degree too much...college...not collage

Beep, Beep ... hey Happy Waiter, where are you? I have been trying to place my drive thru order for five minutes now.<BR><BR>

Tippy, m is right, tip is an option of the customers, your the one ignorant of the service industry, Have you travelled to Asia or Canada? Waiters are not that hungry for tips, sorry if you are in the service industry, you must understand that CUSTOMERS ARE ALWAYS RIGHT, no customers no business , no business no wages, no wages find another job OR BE UNION LEADER. Get what I mean, just think of this, if the customer is not satisfied, do you think he will come back, ask your children he will gladly explain to you plain and SIMPLE. No one returns if he or she is dissatisfied, right?

Tippy, I read all your articles ,I want to know are you a waiter/server or a customer, all your comments seems to be your talking in behalf of servers, like tipping so much, well if your extravagant , that's a different story, I dont think you spend your money wisely. How much savings do you have?

Tippy, are you still there, what's your response then, Mr. Overtip or shall I say Mr. TipHungry

Oh- come on Hertz- I think the operative word you referenced for the happy waiter was "gay". I work with a bunch of queens and "happy waiter" would fit right in. Pull in those claws- MMEEEOOOWWW!

Happy Waiter must be sitting on his hands to keep from responding. What's the matter H.W. we know that you are lurking - I guess we finally shut you up and put you in your proper place. HA HA HA HA HA<BR>la la la la la

Tippy, I guess the past comments have shut you up, next time think first before responding put yourself in other's shoes first, ok?

Wow, you people need to get a life.

You too working girl.

Hoping you all tipped your waitstaff well this past weekend - tipped them well, that is.<BR><BR>tHe hApPy wAiTeR

To Unhappy Waiter:<BR><BR>You are a danger and a menace who knows what you are capable of. Toying with people's health. I hope you get caught and prosecuted, it's only a matter of time.

XXX has toys? Can I play too?<BR><BR>...and how are your eyes, a little bloodshot? I have just the thing next to the corkscrew in my waiter's jacket. brb... {I KNOW what you NEED.}<BR><BR>tHe hApPy wAiTeR<BR><BR>la-laa-laaa-laa-la

Mr. Happy- you remind of Bob, the "mad gay guy" on the old Saturday Night Live skits. Keep up the good posts, except lose the Visine routine please.

Happy ;-( Waiter ... don't stay up too late tonight, you have to go to collage tomorrow morning.<BR><BR>Yes I did tip our server well this evening. He was polite, knowledgeable, and not the least bit intimidating. He didn't tap dance, or make a nuisance of himself, but made sure that we were well taken care of. We actually left a little over 20%. <BR>The main thing, he wasn't obnoxious or in our face, as I'm sure you are with your customers.

Whew! I thought I was done with this posting. Forgive me Sid & Danny (aren't you one in the same?) for not replying to your "jabs" at 4am on Saturday...some of us actually sleep at that time.<BR><BR>Sid, yes, I have been to Canada and Asia. If you had bothered to read the entire string here you would understand WHY they are not as tip hungry in those areas as they are in the USA. As for the customer always being right, no, I don't believe that is true and anyone (in the business) who says it is, is telling you just what you want to hear.<BR><BR>Tell me something, Sid. Is the customer right if he/she misreads the menu and then refuses to pay the whole amount because they "thought it was less"? Is the customer always right if they show up an hour late for a reservation (without calling) and then demand to be seated in a full dining room? Is the customer right when he is asked to put out his cigar in a non-smoking area and then extinguishes it in the waiter's arm (yes, this really happened)? Shall I go on? The simple fact is that no one (not even a customer) is ALWAYS right; unfortunately, this phrase is overused and, generally, it is overused by customers who are often wrong.<BR><BR>Danny (or should I say Sid) and Joe, although I was once in "the business", I no longer am. I understand the business and how difficult it can be for all involved. This does not mean that I turn a blind eye to it when things aren't right. <BR><BR>Yes, I tip well for good service but I also take action if the service is bad, slow or there are other problems with the overall dining experience. Whatever occurs, however, I am always courteous and polite (you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar) and I NEVER assume that I am always right.<BR><BR>May I go now?<BR><BR>TTT

To whom it may concern:<BR><BR>Just thought many of you might be interested to know that there is a new agency which investigates restaurants and their employees. The way it works is that "field investigators" visit various restaurants with instructions to be "difficult" to the wait staff. <BR><BR>This "difficult" behavior manifests itself in many ways (including being rude, sending food back, etc.) but is aimed specifically at the waitstaff. Once the ordered and returned item makes its way back to the table, the investigator takes samples of the food and sneaks them into plastic pouches. The food is then sent off to independent labs for testing.<BR><BR>If the test comes back "positive" for foreign substances, the restaurant is notified and the server (or cook) responsible is prosecuted.<BR><BR>While it is impossible to assign responsibility 100% of the time, so far we have successfully prosecuted 68% of the cases we have uncovered. This has been especially easy when the server or cook in question has left some of "him or herself" in the food item, as we have merely taken mouth swabs for DNA testing.<BR><BR>Make no mistake, adding foreign substances of any kind to a person's food is a felony. Servers may have gotten away with it so far but, if they keep it up, eventually we will catch them.<BR><BR>Gordon<BR>A.F.E.A

For those who think that 12% or 15% is the average tip, American Way maagzine printed this in its April 15, 2002 issue:<BR><BR>IT FIGURES<BR>TRAVEL TIPPING<BR>18.6% That’s what the average diner tips at restaurants in New Jersey and Boston, according to a recent Zagat survey. That makes them the best tippers in the country. In New York and San Francisco, the average is 18 percent. And in Los Angeles, it’s a lowly 17.4. No wonder all those waiters are itching to get into the movie biz. <BR><BR>

Guess those of you who think 20% is average realize how wrong you are now. I would be willing to bet in smaller cities the average is even less. Move down to a city of say 250,000 and I bet it is 15% or less unless it is a very ritzy area.