The Gift Shop: Oh No!
 

Yesterday, I took my kids to the zoo, accompanied by another mom and her child. We said no to buying sodas, but bought each child ice cream, and the day was inexpensive and pleasant. <BR> <BR>On the way out, the other mom's kid asked to go to the gift shop. She said OK. Normally, we stay away from the gift shop to avoid spending lots of money on junk we don't need to fill a house already bursting with junk. But since our companions were going, we followed. <BR> <BR>What a mistake! My kids immediately went into hyper-beg mode. Mom, buy this, buy that, please, come on, you never buy me anything. The other kid was in full whine mode too. I finally had to really let my kids have it and tell them we weren't buying a single thing. So a nice day was tarnished by the gift shop. <BR> <BR>Does anyone with kids really like these places? Who frequents them, and why? Are most of the people just window-shopping or something?

Maria--- I can sympathize. My children are still a little young to beg me to buy things, although my almost 4 year old daughter points out "all the really neat stuff" she sees in the stores. So far I've been able to get away with comments like, "Wow, that IS nice--- let's go find the bathrooms now", but I'm sure it won't be long until she becomes a world class begger. One thing that I do when we go to the zoo, or the children's museum, is to leave the kids with my husband for a few minutes while I check out the gift shops by myself. Sometimes I'll surprise them with a little something, and sometimes I come back empty handed, and they're none the wiser. I'm not sure what would have worked in your situation; you only went in the gift shop because the other mom and child were going in. I know you didn't ask for advice, but maybe a quick warning to your kids that you weren't buying anything, and you expected them not to ask for anything, before you went in, would have kept your day from being ruined.

I love to "window shop" thru gift shops, no matter where I am. Early on I have taught my daughters the joys of window shopping. We can wish for anything we like; ooh and ahh over all the neat stuff; then go home without them. <BR> <BR>About the only thing we come home with are silver charms for charm bracelets.

I generally like to poke around in those places, once in a great while I find something I haven't seen before or an idea for a future birthday present for child, niece, or nephew. So I either give my child -- or if foresighted enough, make him earn -- just enough for one modest purchase, say $2. and tell him he can buy whatever under that amount or save the money for something bigger later. Once in a while, he sees something that costs more that he really wants, and if I think it's a really worthy purchase (video, calendar, etc.) I'll either chip in or make him promise to do a task to pay for it later. Just as often, maybe more so, the idea of having $2. to put with his savings or spend later appeals more than having a gewgaw from the jimcrack store. <BR> <BR>I suspect, however, that maybe with girls who like rings and bracelets or whatever -- which seem to abound in these places -- it might be trickier.

We have always had "collections"--things that might be found cheaply in a gift store. One son's was patches that were sewn (by me) onto a hooded blue sweatshirt until the thing was totally filled. He has this to this day (he's 25!) Other son was models (of dinosaurs, paper airplanes etc) and small paperback books (less than a couple dollars) we bought for both of them. We also usually said yes (within reason) to T-shirts since they end up as useful items to be worn. I think you can't prohibit the gift store. They need to learn the lesson of self control. That way they won't be so overwhelmed when they finally find themselves in a gift store.

I've worked in non-profit organizations (not zoos, specifically), and I can tell you that the shops exist to help defray the overhead, or the special projects, that are never covered by admission If it happens to be a free zoo, so much more the case. It's selling items to people who choose to buy them (and being pressured/whined into doing it by kids unfortunately counts) that helps keep the admission cost lower. <BR> <BR>This is going to get some folks riled, but: even the most kid-friendly organization can't set its fiscal practices based on some kids' bad habits. I used to get lots of letters from mad moms who complained that the kids thought the stuff was free, how dare we tempt the kids, we're capitalistic fiends, etc. No one blinks that Disneyland and music festivals and sports events sell trinkets, but for some reason parents get cranked about museum/zoo/kids' show souvenirs. <BR> <BR>Sounds like lots of you have found great solutions to either avoiding or enjoying the shops. <BR> <BR>My advice: if the kids can't take no for an answer--and I know how tough it is when the kid is young and it's past naptime!--buy the lollipop or the 50 cent plastic lizard and enjoy your good memories of the time spent together. <BR> <BR> <BR>

When my kids were in elementary school, and we visited our zoo frequently, we sometimes bought tee shirts at the gift shop. On at least two occasions, I was able to find posters and other items for class projects in the zoo gift shop. Our zoo has a really good gift shop, lots of educational stuff as well as the junky things.

And don't you just love the Disney et.al., rides that require you to exit through the gift shop or arcade?

I agree with Kam! My mom collects thimbles, and she especially likes ones from places that family members have visited. She has thimbles from countries all over the world, Army bases my husband has been to, and she loves ALL of them. If nothing else, it's worth it for me to make a spin through the gift shop and pick up a thimble just to make my Mom smile!

We were mean parents -- and later, grandparents. We know kids are interested in seeing unusual things, so we'd give each a dollar or two BEFORE we went in the gift shop. Sometimes, one of them even would come out without spending anything -- and keeping the dollar.

Kate - I'm with you. I try to do all my shopping for kids birthdays, Christmas, etc. at the museum & zoo shops. I'd rather have my money go in that direction than Toys R Us. I bought my nephew his very first board game at the Museum of Natural History - DinoCheckers. He loves it. And, I feel I have contributed in some small way to the Museum (in addition to my membership). My rule in the gift shop is 1 toy or book to SHARE between the 2 of them. When the thrill of the toy is over, they put it in a box. At holiday time we take the full box to the local hospital for their pediatric playroom.

I occasionally write articles for the Museum Store Association magazine, so your question is not an unusual one. <BR> <BR>As another poster mentioned, musuem and zoo/aquarium/nature center gift shops do help defray costs a good deal. One of the reasons you see so much "junk" is because of a very simple reason that you have already hit on. Kids love it and buy it! A parent will buy a child a book or educational toy but time and time again, my research shows that the kids go for the trendy/fun stuff that often has nothing to do with the place they are visiting. And if they see one kid buying a glow-in-the-dark key chain, most of them will follow suit. <BR> <BR>For adults, museum gift shops can be a wonderful resource for unique gifts for many occasions. I love wandering through them because many times they have things on clearance like beautiful note cards and ornaments. Or rare CDs from IMAX movies. <BR> <BR>But I can relate to your feelings with your children. You might consider skipping these shops until they are a little older and can appreciate picking out something more appropriate. Or you could go in for them and pick out a few animal decals, pencils, games, etc. <BR> <BR>Many museum stores now offer school groups $5 ready-made "goody bags" to avoid the whole gift shop nightmare. The kids get them before they go home and the adults get a break.

One little aside- if you aren't already (don't know your kids ages) giving your kids a small allowance maybe you should consider it. If I'm at a store and my kids beg, I just say "ok, if you're paying for it". They decide pretty quickly that maybe they don't want it that much! On a special trip I usually tell them before they go in the gift store if I will give them a couple dollars, then if they go over the limit they pay the difference.

Moms and Dads, <BR>Gift shops are a great way to teach your children good spending habits and that you, their parents, are in control. When are kids were young and didn't really have an allowance, we would have a set amount of spending money for them on an outing or vacation. They could buy what they wanted, subject to our "review" Now that they're older, they have their allowance and/or earnings. I will "bank their allowance for several weeks before a trip, but their purchases are still subkect to review (eg. no CDs with parental warnings). They've become great shoppers. Rachel