sb_fool

I've lived in Santa Barbara, CA nearly all of my life. My wife, who grew up in Long Island, is longing for fall leaves, snowy winters and dark green forests again. After trying Santa Barbara for the past few years, the weather has become boring (70F and sunny).

Can anyone give some insight on what it's like for a SoCal native to move to Eastern states such as PA, VA, MA, CT, VT, MD or NY? It would be great to get some "quality of life" comparisons, such as schools, crime, attitudes, natural beauty, cultural activities, recreation, community feel, etc.

I've lived 3 years in seasonal Switzerland and have vacationed many times in the Northeast - specific living experiences would be most valuable! Thx.

Scarlett

I grew up on the South and lived in California before moving to NYC.
If you are thinking of living in or close to Manhattan, the biggest difference will be
1-cost of living
2-depends on where you live ( great beauty or amazing cityscapes)
3-as gorgeous as Santa Barbara is, it is nothing compared to NY in cultural riches..
4-I am not a 'suburban' living lover, but friends lived out in Hicksville/Jericho on LI and they loved the schools and nearby beaches.
5-I sympathize with your wife, I am longing for fall leaves right now myself
I think you will love living in New York! Wishing you good luck..

travdog

SB Fool,

Hey, I grew up and lived my whole life here in SB, too!

I did live in London for a few years in the late 1990's (they definitely have seasons there!)

I loved being away from SB, in a big city. It was much more exciting, and definitely a lot more cultured than SB.

I met my husband there and we decided to move back here for "a while." I had no idea until I was back how much I missed SB, and he fell in love with the "boring" weather.

I know I'm not answering your question exactly, but I just wanted to say hello since it seems like we're kindred spirits, here.

Good luck to you whatever you do!

travleis

I've lived in both the NE and west. I've met many people from the NE who have easily adapted to the casual California lifestyle and weather. I've met comparatively few native southern Californians who were able to adapt to life in the NE and fall in love with it, excluding those who plant themselves firmly in Manhattan and thrive on all its unique amenities.

tracys2cents

New England is beautiful, but the weather is only dependably bearable in May and June, September and October. Unless you like winter sports, you'll be miserable.

crazymina

I lived in Santa Barbara for a year and loved it. I would think many people would envy you!

I knew a girl who moved from Boston to SoCal. Started missing lots of things about the northeast, especially the seasons. They ended up moving back and then one boston winter made her realize she didn't miss it much at all. They came back to our "boring" weather.

I do agree that east coasters seem to transplant here better. Even a cool place like Manhattan, which I love to visit, I couldn't imagine living in. I would have a tough time living in the hustle and bustle of the "concrete jungle" (as my native born new yorker friend always puts it). I have too much of that laid back socal blood in my veins.

However, maybe you would adapt better...and it would be nice of you to do that for your wife.

here_today_gone2Maui

About 12 years ago DH landed a long-term gig in Atlantic city. As a result we spent a very long, hot, sticky, rainy miserable summer in NJ, followed by a freezing, damp, miserable, dark, dreary fall. I didn't stick around to see what winter brought.

Besides the weather extremes, I encountered a lot of negativity from locals who were less than thrilled to have a Californian in their midsts. People who were perfectly friendly would turn sour as soon as they heard the words "California" or "Los Angeles." It was the first time in my life I was mocked for my pronunciation by people who were clearly butchering the same words. (Example: "wah-ter" was wrong. "wooder" was what you drank from the tap) Not everyone we met was so anti-California, but those who were are the ones I remember. DH got called "Surfer Boy," and not in a good way. My daughter also ran into a lot of that when she went to school in Vermont, mostly from the kids from New York. Some of the kids took to calling her and another girl at school, who was also from CA, "The Malibu Barbie Twins," which was used in a derogative manner. Again, most of the kids she met at school were great, but those few are the ones she will always think of when she remembers her time on the east coast.

Scarlett

Not that I feel the need to defend NJ but I was from the South, then from California when I moved to New York City and while a few people would correct me or chuckle over my pronunciation, I was never ridiculed to my face! I think your experience was more of being in a reddish neck area, Atlantic City is not known for being especially sophisticated, is it?
That is awful though, but wherever you go, you can run into ignorant people.
Since NYC is so full of people from all over the planet, I think it might be a little more forgiving of people from California

Tandoori_Girl

New York is hard. CA is easy. That will be a big adjustment.

Stephanie

I live just west of Pittsburgh. Do you really have to live in NYC? If you would live in Virginia the shock of the season wouldn't hit you so fast (its a tad warmer in the wintertime). I'd suggest a city on the East Coast outside NYC that will be convenient to the whole coastline.

paula1470

I agree with travleis. I have known many people from the NE who have moved to California and would never think of going back. Most SoCal natives I know that moved to the NE didn't adjust well and moved back fairly quickly. Again the exception for that is a few that moved to Manhattan (they were mostly stage actors so needed to be there) and loved it. Even some of those actors eventually moved back west depending on how their careers were progressing.

fdecarlo

I was born in western PA but grew up in Socal. I've spent enough time in both areas to be able to offer some comparisons.

In PA I miss the warm, dry CA weather, and proximity to the Pacific ocean.

But in CA I miss far more about PA: most of all, what you called "community feel". There's nothing like walking down a street where 90% of the families have been living there for 100+ years, and are from the same culture (in my case Italian). I've not run into the same thing in CA, although I'm sure similar neighborhoods do exist in the state.

I also miss the three-dimensionality of the people, who have depth as well as height and width, and, unlike many Californians (who can live right next door to each other for 20 or 30 years and never even know each others' names), are genuinely interested in getting to know you. This can be quite upsetting for new transplants from California, who are used to being left alone by their neighbors.

I also miss the history, where e.g. you can walk into a small town and suddenly find yourself having a picnic on a 250 year-old Revolutionary War battlefield.

I also miss the commonwealth environment of the state, where each county feels almost like a completely different country. You definitely won't find that in CA.

With regard to schools, crime etc it depends on the individual city and neighborhood. There are good and bad parts of western PA just like there are good and bad parts of southern CA.

wanderer

SB_fool -
What about trying Long Island for awhile? I don't know where your wife is from, but if you now live in Santa Barbara, I would think costs are comparable. That might be the best shot for your wife to see how much she really does miss the East, since it will be home turf. If that doesn't work, probably she really didn't miss it as much as she thought. You would be near NYC but not IN it - I love the city, but can't imagine living there - too dirty, noisy and busy for me.

I am a native New Englander (MA) and although I enjoy the snow and skiing, have come to hate that Winter is so long - 6 months is a long time to have crappy weather.

I moved to PA for a year some time ago, and even coming from MA, found the summers unbelievably humid. I think if you move to VA, PA or MD, especially coming from California. I think it will be an even bigger adjustment than CT, VT, MA or NY.

We visited Long Island a few years ago and fell in love with Easthampton, Amagansett, and Bridgehampton. They are all beautiful, and the North Fork is developing, but prices way lower.

Whatever you decide, I think you are very sweet to even consider a move for your wife. I have been trying to get my husband to consider a move to CA for some time, and it is like trying to pull the roots of a 100 year old tree up out of the ground. Some native New Englanders don't move easily.

Let us know what you decide!

Stephanie

fdecarlo:

I live in that type of community still, my family has been in my small town since 1919-1920. I would never move to Southern California because there are too many transient people there.

I recommended Virginia to SB because Southern people are much more friendlier than NYC people. I think anytime you move out into the country the people smile more and love life more. I know that if I take Route 30 out to the panhandle of WV (about 25-30 miles west of me - I'm still in PA) and go down the panhandle to Chester, WV and then head South to Weirton the people are generally much friendlier. I wouldn't suggest New England because in general they get alot more snow and that would shock anyone who lives in a moderate climate year around.

lizzard

How about the Northwest instead?

You'll have seasons, beautiful dark forests, and sometimes snow (or else it's very nearby).

In Portland Oregon, the coast (an hour) is beautiful, and surprisingly there are many surfers.

Us westerners have a difficult time moving east, but East Coasters seem to be able to do it by the drop of a hat.

the best part is, there are so many Californians, it's easy to feel at home, and your wife will be happy to have her seasons back!

lizzard

BTW, I'm a Socal guy, and was in a similar situation (my wife is originally from the NW). I meet other fellow SoCal guys on a regular basis (some who've been here for a year or two, others for many years), and nearly everyone of them love it and would never go back.

Scarlett

I agree with lizzard also We just returned from a long visit to Portland Oregon and even though they say the South is friendly, Portland broke the record for polite,pleasant and friendly people!
But since you are asking about NY, I think once you adjust to the newness, you will love it!
You know, people are doing everything they can, from all over the world, to get to NYC and live there, so it can't be too bad
I hope you can let us know the decision when it is made~

sb_fool

Lizzard - your thread on Portland vs Seattle was very interesting and is what prompted me to ask about the East. I thought about the NW too, but wanted the same info for the Northeast. Glad to here things are working out!

sb_fool

To narrow it down a bit - I would be looking to live in a small or mid-size town/city/suburb, nothing like the magnitude of NYC.

Stephanie

sb:

I know some people will bad mouth this place, but I've been to the Allentown/Bethlehem/Easton, PA area many times because an ex-boyfriend use to work at Air Products. I loved the country feel of the outskirts of that town, with the back roads and Crystal Cave and Reading being only about 26 west of it. The convenience is there too - 80-100 miles from NYC and about an hours drive north of Philadelphia. That would be far away enough from NYC to avoid the millions who live there but easy enough for you to visit in about 1 1/2 hrs.