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Company moved me to Tennesse.Oh God,get me outa here!!!!

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My wife & I made our first inter-state move last August. Don't get too excited: it was just from NC (Charlotte) to SC (North Myrtle Beach).<BR><BR>Our relocation is still in progress because we have been unable to sell our condo in Charlotte. So most of our stuff is still there, and it's a lot of fun paying two mortgages (on a teacher's and a receptionist's salary no less).<BR><BR>BUT, we are still happy with our move. We have always tended to vacation at the beach, bought a vacation condo a few years back, and spent increasingly more time here until:<BR>1. I finally got fed up with good-paying jobs that suck out your soul day-by-day;<BR>2. We realized that where we are, and which community we belong to actually matters; and <BR>3. A teaching job opened up in the beach location we had grown to love.<BR><BR>I read a post on another relocation thread that said you should open yourself up to your new community, rather than simply bring your old habits & expectations from your previous home. I think that is a great comment. For a relocation to mean anything, you have to want change--why else move?<BR><BR>One of the major changes I have experienced is that even in a fairly densely populated region, I am face-to-face with nature. That is more important to me than I realized. My front yard is the Atlantic Ocean; my first sight every morning is sand, sea, and birds (occasionally dolphins!), and my cocktail hour is usually spent relaxing in an ocean breeze & watching the sunset coloring the waves.<BR><BR>If I had been born into this environment, I might never have wanted to relocate. Maybe that should be the deciding factor when considering relocation--is there something missing? Do you feel like it might be better somewhere else? If so, put on your traveling shoes.

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We moved three times -- once to Europe and twice within the Norheastern US. Every one of them took some adjusting but worked out fine. However ...<BR><BR>I worked in an industry where people moved a lot and noticed two disaster zones:<BR>1. If one spouse wants to move to an area and the other doesn't, that's trouble waiting to happen.<BR>2. Despite the so-called charm of small-town life, I've never seen anyone move from a small town to an urban area and then later decide to go back to the small town. Once people get used to the lifestlye and conveniences of an urban area, they don't want to go back to Smallville, where a visit to Wal-Mart and dinner at Denny's is a big night out.

Pam,<BR>Research, research, research....and when you're done, go to the place for a week during its least favorable weather. Drop by a few nice bars, chit chat and people watch.....how does it feel? Remove all romantic hunches you have of the place and go for the sheer logic of everyday living. Right, I learned by mistake. My boyfriend was transferred to Atlanta (from So Cal). We were married and here in a month! What was I not thinking??<BR>It's not that Atlanta's a bad place: I'm just not right for Atlanta. Seven years after the fact (and we're moving back southwest next year), I realize that every place in the US is right for somebody....and even if it's difficult, you can learn to make it and adjust. It depends on your hobbies, your friends, your health (allergies, e.g.), the importance your place upon politics, weather, income. What are the things you must and must not have? I am personally very allergic to mold, quite liberal Dem, and have an aversion to 4" spiders. And I had no idea there were pockets of humanity (?) that still used the "n" word regularly. On the other hand, most people who live here love Atlanta, don't mind the humidity, and love the great real estate values. If you make six figures a year, you can live like royalty. And, you can find good people you like anywhere you go.<BR>So, a mistake for me, yes; very stressful to our marriage and my health. But I've learned many lessons, like concentrating on the good stuff that exists (one can find a quiet peace of mind here), and above all, to visit a place extensively before relocating.<BR>I personally prioritize lifestyle and deprioritize bang for the buck...but then, we're in our forties and don't have kids.<BR>I love that someone's mentioned &lt;findyourspot.com&gt; ... that's the kind of research necessary to customize your relocation; then, go 'feel' the place!<BR>Good luck! Good thread.<BR> <BR>

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