Question 4 former New Yorkers living elsewhere now
 

I'm in the hate part of the love/hate relationship with NYC (nothing to do with financial crisis) right now. I'm curious to hear where you're living now and how do you like living there compare to New York.

I was the same way after a couple of years in NYC. My fiancee and I moved to Chicago. I was raised in New York and never imagined leaving the Northeast, but my fiancee is from the Midwest, so we decided to move out here.

I don't regret it at all. I love living in Chicago, and honestly I'm much happier here than I was in NYC. Just got tired of the expense, the crowdedness, the pressure, etc.

Chicago is a big city but is way more relaxed. Housing is more affordable. Gas is expensive but I don't drive, and Chicago has good public transit. Great food and drink city, too. Five sports teams, so there's sports year round.

The winter is a b*tch but honestly I'm used to it after two years and don't even think about it anymore. I'm a cold-weather guy though.

Honestly the main things I miss about the NYC are food related: pizza and bagels and Katz's Deli.

If you want to get into comparing specific things, let me know.

After 40+ years in NY and NJ moved to Texas 18 years ago and and only regret has been I should have moved sooner. Great year round weather, slower pace and with DFW airport less than 30 minutes from my house I can travel to just about anywhere in the country in under 3 hours.

We visit relatives and friends in NYC for a few days 3 or 4 times a year and that's enough to get my "big city" fix.

Born and raised on Staten Island, now living in Tennessee. If I had a multi-million dollar income I'd be back in NY in a minute. But since I'm just a regular person it is much easier and cheaper to live where I do. But I need a "concrete" fix every once in awhile not to mention a decent pizza.

Born and raised in NYC (Queens). Went to Boston for college and never left. I've lived here and worked in Boston for more than 30 years and would not want to return to NY. I still have close family in the city and visit frequently (Brooklyn) but can't see myself moving back. Boston is a more manageable city to live and work in, plus you can live in a nice suburb without having a long commute. You are also close to the Cape and the islands, good skiing in VT, NH and the Berkshires. My husband grew up in Fairfield County, CT and I would consider living there but have no interest in living in NY again.

I've never really lived in NYC (just for a month or two at a time for many years), but I am intrigued by TwoFatFeet's Chicago comments. I just returned from a week in Chicago in a high rise rental apartment.

The first thing I noticed dramatically different from New York is how people talk to each other. In NYC in a high rise apartment, people who don't know each other NEVER seem to acknowledge each other. In Chicago, no one would get on or off the elevator (these are local residents I'm talking about) without saying hello or exchanging pleasantries. In the line at Starbucks, everyone talks to each other. A woman turns to another she clearly doesn't know and asks where she got that purse -- it's beautiful. Someone else asks if they've heard if it's supposed to rain. People say hello on the sidewalk or even waiting for the 'subway'.

It was a noticeable difference. In NYC, most people seem to really value their privacy and generally put a wall around themselves (not that there's anything wrong with that). Totally the opposite in Chicago. I'd think that would bother as many New Yorkers as it would please.

Nothing compares to New York, at least in the USA.

If you leave, prepared to be bored.

Grew up in suburbs of NY, commuted in for summer jobs, did all the cultural and historic things locals do. Continued to visit my grandfather who lived in mid-town for years after I left.

Went to college in Providence and nothing would make me return to NY area. Sure there is everything you would want or need, but there is also crowds, noise, dirt, expense. Since then have realized I am a small city type person - sometimes even Boston feels too big.

And Gekko - I am not bored (or boring) because of the move.

But if I hade it to do over, I would have moved somewhat south - mid-Atlantic states or perhaps Virginia or NC.

I lived in and around NYC for 20+ years and you're right - it's a love/hate relationship. The crowds really got to me.

When we were adopting children, we moved to Sleepy Hollow. Thought I'd miss the city, but I didn't. We were close enought to enjoy it, yet far enough away to "leave the day behind."

Now, we've moved to Rochester - lots to do, very culturally-oriented. While I love the Finger Lakes region, I miss NYC a lot, especially friends.

Would I return? If we didn't have kids, in a heartbeat, but to Westchester, not Manhattan.

I was born in NY, but raised in the 'burbs, which I fled to attend college back in the city.

I spent my young adulthood in cities, both in the US and abroad. At the birth of our first child we made the classic mistake and moved back to the suburbs. I discovered they were as dull and petty as I remembered them.

Boston and Washington (I've lived in both) may be more livable than NY, but still seem parochial. London is almost as good, or maybe better, never quite sure.

Had planned to move back to NYC in the near future, but the financial crisis may have made that impossible -- I may be vagabonding soon instead.

Moral: Never leave the city!

NeoPatrick -- Yes, Chicagoans and Midwesterners in general are far more prone to small talk and pleasantries than are New Yorkers.

It took me about a year to grow accustomed to this.

When my fiancee and I moved into our first apartment, a neighbor stopped to introduce himself and offer us help moving in. My immediate reaction was "Who the F are you, what do you want, and get away from our stuff." Didn't say that, but definitely thought it.

Still weirds me out a little bit when people start conversations in ATM lines or at the grocery store or wherever.

Don't get me wrong, though -- I love city living and I love NYC, but NYC was just too much for me after a couple of years. I guess I find Chicago to be a happy medium.

Gekko's comments are hyperbolic.

I went to law school in the city - lived on saint marks for 4 years in a studio apartment - I LOVED living in new york - I was in my twenties - it was tons of fun -
I've lived in boston now for 6 years - I'm married - I have a baby - we have a great townhouse in cambridge - and live a life I cannot imagine living in new york - if you move to another northeast city then I don't think the transition is all that galling - now, we are contemplating having a second child and buying a house in the burbs - I'm pretty certain that that will provide more culture shock and transition issues (having to drive everywhere????) to me than the move from east village to cambridge MA

Born in Brooklyn but raised in Freeport. Wife is from Laurelton.

I went into retail when I got out of the Navy and in 1963 was offered a promotion and a move to the Detroit area. I turned it down and requested the Northern Virginia store opening in '64.

We made the move in March of '64 and after only one day there, DW informed me she never wanted to go back to NY. We became involved with horses and eventually fox hunting. DW still cannot believe that she, a NYC woman, became a staff member with a recognized Virginia Hunt Club.

We have never regretted the move and always enjoyed our life here. We retired to the Shenandoah Valley ten years ago, which like WV, is almost heaven.

Gekko, the great fallacy of Ny'ers is that the rest of the country is boring. Really, it isn't. Different, dramatically so, but not necessarily boring, depending on where you've gone and what you like to do.

I occasionally miss NYC, but I never, ever, ever miss suburban NJ. Now, that's boring, not to mention expensive, overcrowded, provincial, etc. I am still taken aback by how vibrant and full of resources the near suburbs of Philadelphia are.

I might live in NYC again if I had LOTS of money, but there is NOTHING that could induce me to live in its near suburbs again.

Most American cities lack the sheer cinematic effrontery of NYC, but that does not make them boring places to live, work, and/or visit.

I moved to DC 9 years ago. I love Washington! It's a vibrant, active city with lots of great restaurants, theatre, free museums, parks, nightlife etc.

It has a smaller city feel than NY, and you get a variety of people from all over. Most people aren't from here, so there is a lot of cultural diversity.

You can't find really good bagels here, though.

I also spent some time in Chicago and really liked it there, but I wasn't there for a full winter.

I had clients a few years ago who had moved permanently to Florida from New York. They whined a lot. They were always talking about how there isn't a lot of opera, ballet, symphony, lectures, etc. here like there is in New York. When I asked if they attended the opera here, the philharmonic, many of the lectures, etc. they replied "no". Finally they admitted that they never did any of those things in New York either. And then the wife said, "I guess the difference is that in Manhattan there is so much to do IF you want to". Duh? If you don't do it, what difference does it make that you have more to choose from NOT to do?

Grew up in the South, but spent all of my adult life (so far) in New York or in the suburbs of New York. Just moved 4 mos ago to the suburbs of SF.

I miss New York terribly. There, I said it. I miss the buzz, I miss the fasion, I miss the restaurants, I miss the public transportation, I miss the seasons and, of course, I miss my friends. That being said, it's a nice enough place to live.

I'll vote also for DC and the entire area. It's an easy train ride to NYC (just in case you need a fix!) and there is world class art/music there and in nearby Baltimore. Annapolis a great small town with big art community, opera, ballet, symphony and much water stuff! I think the weather is a bit more moderate-fronts that hit NYC often pass us by.
Hub and I visited NYC for a week and loved it so much we went back for another in order to see just some of the things on our "to see" list. The $ and weather would be factors for us not living there.
Much luck!

DD just left NY after living there for 7 years. She is moving to Chicago. The expense, among other things, just made it hard to continue to live in Manhattan. Unless you are pulling down the big bucks, it is a harsh financial reality in the Big Apple.