Joe's Stone Crab, or alternative?
 

We'll be staying at the South Beach Marriott for two nites in Feb. and want to try stone crabs. Would you recommend Joe's Stone Crab, or can you suggest an alternative near our hotel? Thanks.

I'm sure the locals will have excellent alternatives, but you need to go to Joe's...not just for the crabs, but the fabulous bar, the crowd, the buzz, the whole atmosphhere thing, asnd you can say you went to Joe's, not some other olace...

Many places will carry stone crab when they're in season (until March?) -- the claws are basically the same wherever you buy them, unless you encounter an unscrupulous vendor who sells "floaters" (these are the shrunken claws which are mostly shell and not a lot of crab meat).

But the bottom line is: don't you want to be able to say you went to the one and only Joe's Stone Crab?

We don't really care about saying we went to Joe's. We mainly are interested in having stone crabs. If there's an alternative, would love to hear about it since we don't particularly want to have to wait for hours to get a table.

I don't know -- I live in Tampa. If you don't get any recommendations on this board, check out chowhound.com -- go to the florida board and post there. Also read the many posts on there about stone crabs and Joe's -- you might find a good rec.

In all the years I've been in Florida (40), and the many times I've been to Miami (countless many), I've not been to Joe's myself. At this point, having sampled this Florida delicacy throughout the state, I'd like to go to Joe's just to say I've gone and provide that POV. The claws are basically the same everywhere (with the exception of the floaters that I noted in my other post) -- the sauces might vary but then I like mine with drawn butter.

Good luck. And bon appetite!

I went to Joe's once and I wasn't impressed. It was a see and be seen type place with incredibly horrible service and seating strictly according to how important you are (needless to say we were near the bottom of being seated). I don't have specific suggestions in Miami, but I still say that eating crab claws is a messy and active sport. It is best going to a fresh seafood market, going somewhere outside at a park and table or at your pool at a condo (if allowed) and dig into them. You buy them already prepared and chilled so they are ready to eat. How about doing a "picnic"?

I know Tandoori Girl likes hers warm, something which just amazes me, being a "purist", but I realize she's not alone.

Some of us grew up without knowing the proper way to eat these darned things, Florida's poor inlanders. I don't recall having them as a kid but then the first crab I had came from Red Lobster's first restaurant in Lakeland. When I first had stone crabs, I was addicted -- but they weren't so expensive back then. They weren't particularly hot items (and I'm not referring to temperature here, although it's true that most people eat them cold as Patrick does -- but then Patrick also eats his abominably with a fork and knife...).

You can buy them at Publix and eat them cold, using a heavy suitcase or a large cinderblock to crack open the 8" thick shells, taking care not to smash your precious fingers.

What, Tandoori Girl??? No fork or knife has ever touched my stone crab claws! Dig in and pull them out with the fingers and eat them. Although I do usually have one of those tiny little forks for reaching into the hard to get places if necessary.

I've never bought them at PUblix, but any seafood market or supermarket I've bought them at will crack them for you -- saving you an enormous amount of trouble, or as in my case saving you a cutting board that split in half when I hit a claw with a hammer on top of it. The claw remained unscathed.

What about Monty's Stone Crab in Miami? Have you eaten there and would you recommend? (I like the idea of just getting takeout and maybe making a picnic out of it, but what if the weather's bad? Then we'd want a restaruant).

For us, it is a crapshoot. Joe's is a little better than Monty's but Joe's is a pain in the ass trying to get a table. Either/or, the crab is great.

orangetravelcat-- DEFINITELY go to Joes- their stone crabs are the best..
Monty's usually has previously frozen stone crabs AT THE same prices as Joes..

Joes are fresh-just off the boat...

Make sure you get there by 430pm and there is NO wait in line..Line starts forming around 5pm and then the wait gets up to 2 hours...I have only waited for stone crabs 2 x and vowed never again..So NOW , I get there at 430pm

The normal menu for this is Stone crabs, Joe's special cole slaw and Hash Brown potatoes..It makes no difference where you sit, as the service is just the same..We have never had bad service-- but sometimes it is service with super speeed as they like to turn the tables over quickly..but we then eat slower....

Have a blast- when I called a restaurant in Delray over Xmas for their stone crab prices, I was quoted 39.95 for medium, $44 for large and $54 for jumbo...ALL of this is A LA CARTE..and the sides serve at least 2 people..

ALso Joes has REAL Key Lime Pie..not the green jello kind...

Now that you mention key lime pie....that's my husband's favorite! We should be able to get to Joe's early...so hopefully we won't have a big wait.

No alternative!! We just went there last night. It is the most amazing place ever. There is no second to Joes, and I wasn't even sure before I went either.

I just have to jump in here - Patrick's right, they're best eaten sloppy. But given the chance (up til now) I'd still go to Joe's just to go...til I heard that price. Wow. It must be quite a beautiful restaurant with fabulous ambience to warrant the prices Andy quotes...?

And Tandoori girl, in defense of "floaters": Nobody likes them, but my seafood supplier once told me about an unscientific experiment he did a few years ago: he cracked a few pounds of floaters, then cracked the same weight in regular stones, and then weighed the meat. Guess what he found: pound for pound you get the same amount of crabmeat - it's just that with the floaters (called that because the layer of air inside the shell causes them to float to the top of the cookpot unlike their denser brothers) they look bigger than they should.

And beware of chain supermarkets selling stone crabs...I've seen those here in Tampa Bay selling a different species with a bumpier shell, a coldwater crab...not as sweet or as valuable! Ask!

Joan- I am with you -concerning the prices..I have been eating them for over 30 years but decided NOT to partake this past trip down to FLA>..

The way we figured it out, it would have been over $150 per couple for dinner..Granted, IF you have NOT had these, they are worth it...Just could NOT talk hubs into spending that much for seafood...

The restaurant is NICE, but very noisy..black and white tile floors..great wood bar and outside area to have a drink and wait...but you are seated on bentwood chairs ( not the most comfortable)...STILL, it is a GREAT experience if you have not been....Maybe I can talk him into it next month when we are back down there...

Truthfully, all the crab claws are cooked immediately on the boats and then frozen.

Maybe all the hype just makes them seem better at Joe's.

Isn't that right, Joan? Or did I get that wrong?

I defer to Joan in all things seafood.

Gee thanks TG! But no they're not always frozen immediately...but if they are, they are one of the few seafoods that freeze well - those intractable claws make a nicer airproof container for the delicate meat. By the way, (Patrick) you might try holding the claw in the palm of your hand and cracking it all over with the back of a regular dinner knife...kind of like a hardboiled egg. Then you can pick off the pieces and voila! if you're good (and lucky) you have remaining an intact claw just waiting to be devoured. But you still need pliers for those knuckles..DO NOT FORGET the knuckles...chock full! Aaahhh I'm hungry now!

Tandoori Girl, they are boiled on the boat and then put on ice, but not frozen. I've never had them after being frozen, and surprised to hear they would still be so good.

By the way all this discussion reminds me of a very elegant dinner party I once attended near Buzzard's Bay, near Cape Cod. We sat at a very elegantly set table with fine linens, china, and silver and were served whole lobsters. I just wanted to roll up my sleeves go out in the yard and dig into it. Some things are meant to be enjoyed casual -- stone crab claws and whole lobsters are two of those. Fried chicken comes to mind also.

Patrick, reminds me of my best friend's rehersal dinner. Since her father was paying, he got to pick the menu.

He wanted a pig pickin'. We had pig, collards, grits, and macaroni and cheese on fine china, waterford crystal, white linens, and her mothers heirloom silver.

You can walk from the South Beach Marriott to Joes. Just a couple of blocks inland. Here's my recommendation for stonecrabs and Joe's:

Get there early and position yourself at the bar. They serve a great French Champagne in very nicely iced flutes. You can polish a few of these off as you watch the juxtapositioning for a table for dinner. How much will that elderly couple tip? What about those gauche trendies? Will that pushy group get seated before those quiet preppies? It is highly amusing. Once you have had enough of this scene, you can head next door to Joe's To Go, get your claws and slaw and take them down for a picnic on the Government Cut or on the beach at Nikki's (just south of the Marriott) and chow down watching the half-dressed compete for admission.

If this makes you hungry for food, head to Nemos or to Smith and Wollensky, both within walking distance....if otherwise hungry, back the the Marriott.

LMF

LMF, what a great idea. I was there seething since my name was on the list and I was one of those people that the ones at the bar were placing their bets on (or against). I don't care to do it again. But to sit there and enjoy it because your name ISN'T on the list is really clever.

I totally agree with LMF. Go get take out at Joe's. They have everything there that the restaurant serves, including the key lime pie, which is a MUST.

My husband and I used to go to Joe's all of the time when we were without children. Since the kids came, we do the take out and we actually enjoy it more!

Just make sure that they give you enough of their mustard sauce for the crabs. Oh yes, and lots of napkins! Enjoy!

I'm a Maryland who loves blue crabs and a Floridian who loves stone crab claws. We keep nut crackers here at the house in Florida for breaking the claws a little more after the market has broken them. The nut crackers work well. We also like to eat the stone crabs with a bit of Old Bay seasoning on them - ummm good!! It adds a great spice to that sweet crab meat.

If you're thinking of a picnic - pack a couple rolls of paper towels, some nut crackers, some beer, a couple cutting boards (makes everything easier) and for appetizers use some seafood sauce (the ketchup and horseradish mix type) with some crackers and you'll have an old fashioned Maryland crab picking picknic. We haven't found many blue crabs here on the west coast - if any of you find any good ones please post their locations.

Orangetravelcat,

If you do go to Joe's, be sure to have their Manhattan-style clam chowder (the red). They serve it tableside in bowls that are so hot it sizzles when they ladle it in--it's excellent!

Strive

To LN:
Oh you and your Old Bay! My goodness I bet you put it on your cornflakes too! :)
Don't know where on the west coast you live, but I know 3 places in St. Pete you can get live blue crabs - they're all located on 49th Street South...and subject to weather and whim of the owners:

Save On Seafood (15 th Ave south)
Tom's Crab Cooler (a private home with stand outside on Tangerine Ave & 49th St So) (best reputation for fat crabs and prices to match)
An Unnamed Shack (a concrete outbuilding on the parking lot of the old lumber bldg at 8th Ave south & 49th Street)
Happy pickin!

OK...here's a scenario for you. You have a restaurant that serves stone crabs. They come cracked, but you know how that is. One diner manages to get a cut on his finger eating the crabs (yes cocktail fork is available on the table as well as cracker to use as necessary). He doesn't notice said cut right away, so ends up with some blood on his pants and shirt--which is how he realizes he has been cut. Diner wants pants and shirt cleaned at your cost plus meal comped. Your response is....?

Not that I would know anywhere that this might happen! ;)

Is the diner related?

If not, I would just probably smile while bloody diner confronts management.

If bloody diner is related, I would tell bloody diner to shut up.

Go Travel's pretty well said it right.

Tell the bloody diner to go to bloody Hell! (Not that they'd use that kind of language in a really nice place like the one I suppose you're talking about).

I used to have friends like that. I don't go out to eat with them any more. They were always looking for things to complain about and asking for comped everything.

There's lots of people around like that who like to eat free and get dry cleaning done too!! It's amazing that some smart thinker hasn't figured out a way to stop them cold...

And Joan thanks for the three blue crabs places. Yes, I always put Old Bay on my corn flakes, my burgers, my french fries, soups, and my crab cakes too!! But, if you haven't tried it, you ought to - it adds a great flavor AND it comes from Maryland.

I'm just below St Pete on Longboat Key. So when I go by to get some of these fat, heavy crabs I'll call you when I'm ready to start cooking and you can come help us devour them!!

If we get takeout, will the crabs already be cracked and ready to eat? We have no idea how to crack them; that's why I'm asking.

Orange cat: stone crabs will be cracked and come with everything you need. They expect that many are ordering these for their hotel rooms, etc.

OO: This sort of opportunistic person exists everywhere. Even a great place like Oystercatchers probably gets their share. Finish 2/3 of an entree and send it back...half a bottle of wine, etc. etc. Pure Chutzpah. LMF

LMF

Joan, will you let me know when LN has those crabs ready? I have a few old rusty bins of Old Bay I've been trying to get rid of. Well worth a trip to Long Boat Key to get that stuff out of the cupboard ;~)

we were there one night ... hammered ... the actor from "Officer and a Gentleman" was at the next table. can't remember his name but it was the character in the movie who hanged himself ... friend of mayo's.

pretty funny, we heckled him pretty good.

"actor who hanged himself " is David Keith :)

OO, you'll enjoy this. I remember the night many years ago we were at Bern's. A young couple, looking under 21 but drinking so either they had fake ID's or were older than they looked performed a scene. In the middle of dinner, the girl stood up and starting raving about how bad her steak was. The guy stood up too. Before long they were literally throwing their food across the room. It was unbelieveable. We were nearly done, but they were escorted to the lobby. When we got to the lobby after we had paid, we discovered they were waiting for the police and their car had been "impounded". It seemed they had no money and this was a fun thing they did, planning for the restaurant to be glad to get rid of them. But Bern's wasn't ready to do that. They were demanding not only full payment for the dinners they ordered, but for the "damage" as well, including the broken glasses they threw across the room. This young couple was looking very pale indeed when we left.

I wish there were a simple way for these people who want to "take" a restaurant for all they're worth to get their due.

My gawd, Patrick, how funny. You must have been flabbergasted! Theater in the round.

I strongly believe the industry, restaurants, hotels, whomever, brings some of this on themselves by comping anything and everything, fault or no, just do it--at the drop of <i>any</i> hat. No skin off our backs and it creates goodwill. Well, that's true, but it also breeds this sort of behavior so you have those who go around looking for things and if they don't exist, creating their own. Your couple got an early start on the profession, but good for Berns, hopefully the behavior was nipped in the bud! How funny...it's a wonder you were able to snap your jaws shut long enough to chew!

When I heard the stone crab story I was apoplectic...which is why he runs the hotel and I don't. Oh...I calmed down on learning they had put their foot down with this one, thank goodness.

Tandoori Girl, I'm with you on warm stone crabs. In my case I think it may have something to do with the fact that I grew up in New England and got my crustacean start with lobster, then moved on to New Orleans and crawfish, so may be trying to duplicate that flavor.

OO, for what it is worth, I see some of the things my husband puts up with in his restaurants and wonder how he puts up with the crap.

Out of good faith on a complaint, my husband gave a gentleman a $50 credit towards a future dinner. The diner came in several nights afterwards and used the credit.

His dinner came to around $35. When he did not get cash back change from the credit, he wrote a letter to the editor of the local paper COMPLAINING! I couldn't believe this.

LN and Tandoori Girl: Thanks and Yes! Let's do this! I'll bring the stone crabs (if I can get 'em that is!) and we'll do a blue crab/stone crab/hot/cold/with Old Bay/without Old Bay taste test! And Olive must come too. And all the other Fodorites in the area, including those vacationing here! Maybe Patrick and LMF can drive up? (They have to bring the wine though....mmmm!) We will solve the dilemna once and for all (of course I already - smirk - know what the outcome will be) :)

Joan, jump over to the Europe board. There's a Tampa Getogether post there. I'm not sure where it's headed but they've got it steamrolling somewhere.