Will the stress kill me?
 

My husband wants to see the Dolomites at the end of our Italy trip.
We are flying out of Milan on a Sunday. The previous day dh really wants to see the Dolomites, is it possible to get from Como to the Dolomites and then back to Milan in the same day?
Will we have a chance to see anything?
I am having a difficult time changing his mind on this so any ideas of making possible or getting him to agree to nix the idea would be really appreciated.

Not clear about your time fram, but according to www.viamichelin.com....it is almost 4 hours from Bellagio to Castellroto (near Bolzano). I did not look at the mileage from Bolzano back to the Milan airport. Are you saying you want to get there and back in one day? Maybe just to have lunch while you look at the beautiful mountains.

Sure, it may be strenuous, but stress? Is he expecting you to do a lot of the driving?

I have driven from Columbus (OH) to Louisville (4 hrs) and back in the same day, when there was a very important social function; we have THAT kind of family.

If you leave at 6 am, and return at midnight - - you have ten hours there. I bet you can find people who put in a full day of skiing and do this.

So, this is partly a marital question, and partly a travel question.

On the marital side, has he made it clear that he will plan the entire day?or is he dumping on you?

On the travel side, is there some reason that you can't drive the four hours to Castelroto on Friday night? and stay there, spending the day in the Dolomites?

I think that two caring spouses can work this out.

Best wishes,

Rex

I look at it a little differently from Dr. Rex because I don't like stress.

Why go to Europe and hunt for ways to make the trip stressfull?


There is enough of that over here. You can suffer at home a lot cheaper; you don't even have to look for it. It finds you.

By staying home you will have money to pay for medical care of your stress related illnesses.

Hi, Lenox. If your dh wants to do something, let him. You don't have to own it. Let him do the work and be the owner of the experience. It's a vacation!!! Haven't been to Como yet so don't know about travel times, but by the way, the Dolomties stick up in the air, with snow around their tops and so what? If you have seen the Rockies, you won't be impressed. It's a drive-by unless you spend time there. Como, on the other hand - that is a great place to visit. So, try this: drive through Dolomites on your way to Milan. Hey, what do I know - no, you can't do it same day. It just isn't worth it.

Go ahead and plan for it now. It's only a day trip and you aren't making a commitment to a hotel or anything that would put you out more than the cost of the rental car. Then you can change your mind when you are there if conditions are inhospitable for driving or you talk to a local resident that gives you some more insight on the distance/roads/etc. I have changed plans for daytrips based on infromation from locals either to go somewhere I didn't know about or skip something that i thought i would see.

The direct car journey, up to the top of the lake and then across through Sondrio, takes a lot longer than you think it's going to. But it IS great. As are the Dolomites - which look like few other mountains on earth. Failing to see them because you might have seen the Rockies is about as rational as avoiding New York because you've seen Paris, or staying away from Hamlet because you've seen Hedda Gabler.

The "fast" road route (down to Milan, then autostrade to Verona and up the valley) really is mostly unpleasant. Whenever I've used it on holiday, I've regretted it.

So just a suggestion, since it's years since I lived there. But it might still work.

There's a good FS train service between Milan Centrale and Como (NOT the FNM train to Milan Cadorno). And there certainly used to be an excellent early-morning fast train to Munich, stopping at Trento and Bolzano, getting into Bolzano before lunch. The return left Bolzano in the early evening, getting you into Centrale 10-ish, and so into Como 10.30-ish.

And absolutely nothing could be less stressful.

Everyone here seems to think you ahve to do this by car...you can do it by fast train Milano-Verona with a change there for a ride into the Dolomites. Go early enough and you could get all the way to the Brenner Pass and back.
What you DIDN'T tell us is WHY you are so determined to change his mind? Is it because you feel you are going to be "dragged along" against your will.
If you can't stand it then here's my suggestion for getting him to think twice..tell him to go alone and see what he says...or are you confident enough in your relationship to actually do that? Could it be that he thinks you'll end up finding the trip interesting and would enjoy your own delight when it turns out to be fun?
I wish I thought you would reapeat THIS response to him!

I think that "we" (some of us) surprsed Lenox - - because "we" have too often nearly a "one-note" song about the "right way" to travel.

Drive eight hours in one day? Too frantic!

Drive 4-5 hours day after day for 3, 4 or 5 days in a row? What? Are you crazy?

Pack and unpack 6 times in 14 days? You don't "understand" Europe!

It's almost funny considering "our" mantra for the sanctity of packing light.

There are far fewer absolute rights and wrongs than "we" often suggest.

I do it as much or more than the next person "See where you are more; move around less". "No rail passes". "Dont'take that eight hour train, when a 75 minute flight is available cheaply".

We spout what WE believe, and in some cases, it is time tested - - but that means that it works (some of the time) for "us" (and we enjoy feeling oh so smug when it does).

:)

Wow, all kinds of intersting responses to my question. The main reason I am hesitant about going is that he wants to this on the last day. We have had very bad luck in the past with day trips to Monaco (train strike) Normandy (got severly lost) and Aspen (they shut the pass down in winter).
Since we have a 15 hour flight the next day to come home I just don't want to end my trip with scrambling to catch trains or getting lost in the car (common problem).
I look forward to seeing the Dolomites just not under these conditions. Why can't we do it next time?
Thank you again for all your helpful responses.