worldinabag

Hi

How much of what "still needs to be done" is swirling in your head? What I do is use a small whyteboard and together with my partner write down what needs to be done and by whom. Your problem could be that you haven't delegated anything! Don't take everything on yourself. Try it - it does work.

Good luck

suze

I believe I get less anxious than most because I often travel alone, so no one's expectations but my own to be responsible for.

Also I work from lists, so nothing will be forgotten.

And am a fairly obsessive packer, which keeps my mind of worrying about potentially more important disasters.

Sue4

I usually plan trips for months ahead - with much excitement. However, the anxiety sets in when I start getting things ready for the dogsitter - and realize that my poor doggies will be "almost" alone for 2 whole weeks! This anxiety seems to get worse with every trip, but I must admit I have a great time once I'm there. The dogs seem happy and content (and fatter!) when I get back.

LoveItaly

I do understand how everyone feels.

This is what works for me. I do not handle trips planned months in advance well. At the most I like a month to plan a trip. Reserve the airline ticket, any hotel reservations etc. I do think that the internet has caused an overload of information for travellers, even for me.

Making list after list of the "best restaurants", planning to the minute when various sites will be seen, especially if one needs to make reservations since Europe has become so crowded with travellers from all over the world.

Trying to make train reservation online in advance (I have noticed so many people having so many problems trying to reserve train tickets on the Tranitalia website).

Again, I first make the airline reservations. Then reserve any needed hotel reservations..and I do not worry about finding the "perfect hotel"..location is important..but since I tend to stay in hotels that Europeans stay in I am not as concerned as some. An ensuite bathroom, clean and again location are the three important things to me, in no paticular order as I do want all three of these requirements met.

I take a legal pad and make a list. One for financial/legal stuff. Call the CC companies, the financial institutions regarding ATM usage. I do like to take Euro with me as IF ATM's are not working, or power is down I DO want some local money with me. I also get US Dollars so when I return home I don't have to look for an ATM. The small cost is worth it to me.

Packing, ages ago I made a list of what I need (not what I want). I make sure about 10 days in advance I have packed my carryon with bathroom toilitries etc.

Clothes..I pack one color for shoes and only pack two, and wear one pair of course on the flight (well except going through security LOL). I pack clothes depending on weather and I make sure they will work with the shoes. I always take some kind of a jacket or coat depending on the season on the plane. I pack enough for one week, a nice selection. I have done that when I have been in Italy for two months at a time. If you have a nice selection for one week you could last for a year. Either hand wash, use a laundry place or have items drycleaned.

Lets say I am leaving on a Tuesday. On Sunday evening before I go to bed my carryon is packed..doubled check to make sure I have all documents including passport, airline info etc.
My checkin luggage is packed and closed also. Both go in the entry, by the front door. I do NOT open either again..I have double checked and I know that I have everything important.

I annually update all pertinent info that I give my daughter and SIL..so they have it in their home regarding all business contacts and insurance info etc. that they would quickly need if something drastic happened. So far nothing drastic has happened thank goodness!

On the day before I leave I plan on interruptions, phone calls, emails etc. from wellwishers. It is what I call my "free day"..with nothing that I personally have to do, no appointments etc.

I am retired now but when I owned my business I did this the same way except the difference was I worked sooo many extra hours getting everthing organized at the office and getting my desk completely cleaned off.

I believe the reason that I don't like trips planned way in advance is because I do get anxiety and stressed out thinking about all the last minute things that will have to be taken care of. I do better if I don't have a lot of time and consequently am able to take care of everything shortly before my trip.

I don't know if my explination makes sense to anyone or not..I just know that is what works for me.

rbnwdln, hopefully when you get on that plane for Italy you will completely relax! Wishes for a beautiful time in beautiful Italy!!

Maire

I know what you mean Sue4; it is soooo hard to leave my pups. LoveItaly, that sounds like a great plan; if nothing else, I really hope I can be fully packed a few days before...which will be a miracle. I'm usually up late packing the night before a trip.

J62

Excitements turns to anxiety when you're late leaving the office, stuck in traffic on the way to the airport, torrential downpour, roads flooded and numerous accidents, endless string of taillights as far as the eye can see, one lane closed on the bridge, etc.

You get to long term parking, grab the first spot you find, slog your bags through ankle deep water, miss the shuttle as it pulls out of the station so you have to wait for the next one.

Get to the terminal and see a line at security snaking back and forth a dozen times...

Oh wait. I think I've just described when anxiety turns to panic....

Now panic turns to optimism when you sweet talk your way to the front of the crew only security line, wisk through at light speed, dash down one escalator, along the mile long moving walkway and get to the gate just as the FA is getting ready to close the door, and they greet with you a smile and say "welcome aboard, we're glad you made it."

Last one on the plane, row 65L or something like that, but who cares at that point.

Mad dash, but I made it. Nothing like an adrenaline rush to start your day.

LoveItaly

Geez J62, were you with me the last time we went to SFO to fly to Hawaii? You must have been..you just described our drive to the airport and also in the airport perfectly!!!!

Maire, please believe me, it does not take any longer to pack your luggage ahead of time versus at the last moment. And with all that you and your daughter have going on I truly hope you will pack ahead of time!! Best wishes.

J62

Hi Love,

Today, AA JFK to SFO, Hutch to Whitestone to Van Wyck?

1jan1

rbnwdln, There are so many good ideas here ... it is unbelievable what we put ourselves thru to get...somewhere.

Owning my own business, having 4 children ranging in age 6 thru 19, widowed mother and mother in law and doing all of the planning and reservations...it certainly CAN be overwhelming.

My husband travels quite a bit for his business but his staff at work takes care of all arrangements...he is totally uninterested in working on plans for OUR trips - unless - something doesn't work. So a couple of things that I have found that work for me:

I have a master list of almost (I really think it is everything) that I must have checked off in order to leave our small town...whether we are going to lake house or 3 weeks in Rome.
Therefore I don't have to think about any of that stuff.

I take something to wear for the hotest day possible and the coolest day (check with accu weather.com) and just fill in the rest.

And this is this is key, just don't talk about what you are going to do, eat, where you are going to stay, etc. I once quoted a web site about a hotel, the grounds, the fountain, etc...and when we got there is wasn't at all as described - it didn't even look like the pictures. Really if I hadn't given my family a verbal picture of what they were going to experince they wouldn't have had the expectations and therefore wouldn't have been disappointed. Now when we go on vacation I don't give any of them much information - if we have a room change either upgrade or the room by the elevator they don't know how disappointed I am...they are just glad to be THERE and so should you.

When I bought my first house a friend asked when I was going to have a small gathering - I said that I was waiting until I could buy the rug, sofa, entertainment center...she suggested that I just buy a couple of candles, turn the lights down and relax and enjoy my friends at that moment.

I now think that travel should be like that too.

Oh, just last night I dreamed that I was at the gate with my small roll on and TWO purses...I'm not even traveling for 42 days!

Have a great time and keep some secrets about those travel plans.
1jan1

LoveItaly

Ah Jan, in that I was always the "travel agent" for my family..now I am on my own so don't have to answer to anyone..your thoughts and suggestions are very good. Yes, let everything be a surprise! Don't build their hopes up, LOL. Very good advice!!

J62, I got the JFK to SFO but Hutch to Whitestone to Van Wyck? I am sorry..you have lost me LOL. Just hosted a pasta luncheon for about 50 people..so maybe my brain has closed down for the night.

dsm22

That is funny, I am an obsessive packer too. I start like 2 months in advance, and plan what I am going to pack months in advance.

I realized that I feel out of control about so much of my traveling, and that is the one thing I can control, my packing, so I focus on every little detail.

I find in my daily life that lists, and then highlighting what I accomplish helps me a great deal. It's just taking one step at a time, and getting done what you can before you go away. Then you have so much to do when you get back as well. Yeah, I definitely make myself nuts.

You know I never wanted to go on a vacation where you just sat somewhere, like the beach, or the mountains for a week. I always have to have the running like mad vacations. Like, WDW 7 parks in 8 days. My trip to England and Scotland, 3 cities in 12 days and three tours.....etc.

I would always feel like I was wasting my vacation if I wasn't cramming as much stuff in as I possibly could. It's like I feel guilty that I would be wasting my vacation if I did not get enough done.

You know, I really have to learn to just shut down a little more. Learn to relax. Be excited about my vacation, as a time to relax(?!) and not feel guilty and push myself into anxiety.

I have to think more about this. It's hard though when you don't hardly get any vacation. I would have had three weeks this year if I stayed at my last postition. I thought two weeks for when I go to Belgium/Netherlands, and a week of doing nothing. And not feeling guilty abaout it. It was a thought, anyway. A time to recharge to batteries. Now, I don't have any vacation, so that ends that.

Maire

LoveItaly -
I can’t come up with ideas for Christmas presents, no matter how hard I try, until a week or two before; then POP, I have all kinds of ideas. I’m like that with packing; I make lists, and on paper everything is organized, but somehow I’m still up packing at 2:00am the night before. I’m definitely trying to mend my ways, especially for this trip. I don’t want the last days before we leave to be chaos. I’ll keep you posted.

WillTravel

rbnwdln, I know it's tough, but I think what you have to think about is allowing yourself to be imperfect. It's sort of funny but now years later I still every now and then think about how I could have saved $10 by buying a different bus pass, or something like that .

Just accept you won't make the perfect dinner choice every time, you might be a bit tired some mornings or evenings, you might not gauge the crowds with exact accuracy, but you'll still have a fabulous time in Italy!

And another general tip - when you are going from one place to another, don't force yourself to go faster than you feel comfortable with. So allow yourself plenty of time to get to airports, train stations, various sights, etc. Don't feel you have to rush, because that's when most problems happen. Giving yourself permission to be slow and even a bit inefficient will relieve a huge amount of stress. (I don't know if you're driving a car in Italy, but this would apply very much here too.)

Sue_xx_yy

Pretend you're on assignment for a major newspaper, and that your assignment is to detail the kind of hassles that a typical traveller might face in the last few days before a trip. Furthermore, your editor has stipulated that the more hassles you describe in your piece, the better you will get paid.

Bon - or should that be - "well-paid" voyage.

edhodge

Willtravel- I don't know how much your advice helped rbnwdln but it sure was a huge help to me. Thank you.

emvic

When I'm in the throes of my obsessive four months of planning for this trip, which thanks to the internet you can do ad nauseum, I think of the trip my family took to Europe in the mid-1960s. My college professor father got a grant to do some research in Europe for the summer. My mother had one week to plan the trip -- no internet, no Rick Steves, no TV travel shows, etc. She had to arrange for the purchase of a Volkswagen camper in Germany, pack for two adults and three small children, get passports and immunizations, and rent out our house. To this day I still can't figure out how she did it!

stokebailey

missypie, your husband sounds so much like mine; could we be sharing a bigamist?

Maire

That is amazing, isn't it Emvic. Before the internet, I don't know how anyone could plan a trip like this unless they used travel agents.

Parfym

I think we all need a certain amount of excitement, and travel will provide tHAt. No matter what happpens, it usually works out, or we wouldn't be here on this site, to talk about it.
Keep a tight trip and...... then relax.

L84SKY

Thank you rbnwdln for asking the question. I'm so glad to find I'm not alone. I have my lists and organized suitcase etc but it still happens.

For the work anxiety I simply remind myself that I deserve a vacation. I look back over all the good work I've done for my employer since my last vacation and know that if something besides a vacation happened they would find a way to muddle through without me. And the bonus is; when you come back you'll be a happier worker making an even better contribution to your job and probably society on the whole!
There! Feel better?
Maybe it's time to sit back, take some long, slow deep breaths.
Do some yoga or take a nice long walk . It doesn't have to be long but the longer the better.

(Personally, I turn it all over to God at that point and simply ask for divine assistance throughout my journey and that I be a blessing wherever I go. For me when my excitement turns to anxiety it's a call to Spirit.)