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We want to marry on Italy trip but not legally. Possible?

We want to marry on Italy trip but not legally. Possible?

May 2nd, 2007, 10:01 AM
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 1,126
My wife and I had our legal wedding before a much bigger ceremony.
It made sense to me. Something about raging hormones.
As far as my opinion, I'm sorry that jody has been put into a place where she can't have the "legal" wedding where she obviously wants one (Italy).
I wish them the best.
jabez is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:05 AM
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 1,513
Now I am confused
"That doesn't change the fact that it if something is worth doing, it's worth doing right. I didn't make the rules and am truly pained pointing them out causes such offence to some poeple. However, the 'right way' exists for very good reasons, one of which is lasting happiness and respect for the commitment."

So having a "marriage" with family in Italy, calling the trip a honeymoon and having the legal paper signing wedding afterwards means no lasting marriage and respect for the commitment?
wombat7 is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:12 AM
Join Date: Feb 2003
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Jody, hon, taking elderly parents doesn't make it a honeymoon, lol! Now, take my advice and call it our "wonderful pre-wedding trip". Then, you can bug your hubby for years about the honeymoon he owes you.
Trust me.
Good luck and have a blast!
LLindaC is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:16 AM
Join Date: Jan 2007
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You know, there are always ways and means...without "faking" it like this... Here in Ireland, many young couples baulk at a wedding because with the Irish tradition and large families, a wedding can put them in debt for many years. so they set up house together, often with a baby or two...A young woman, who was living with the father of their young child, came to me seeking advice. she was suffering because she knew she "should" be married....longed to be... I was privileged to help her , via a sympathetic Franciscan Friar, toarrange a small, secret wedding in a tiny country Church. Making the cake and bouquet was a great joy... There were just seven of us there, including the toddler. A beautiful and holy occasion....Cost; minimal..Sacrament and legalities all in one. These things can always be done if the heart and the will are there. And I wonder what regrets there will be in a few years for Jody..
anchoress is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:26 AM
Join Date: Jan 2007
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What I am trying to say, and doing so badly, is that you deserve the reality of a real wedding. Not some symbol that means nothing and has to be redone later... The real joy and beauty of a wedding, then the honeymoon in its real place too, to get the full meaning of it all, as a bedrock for your future together. Not shifting sands..Blessings always
anchoress is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 01:07 PM
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give me a break, people. She can do whatever she wants -- that's what she deserves.

fishee is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 01:28 PM
Join Date: Mar 2007
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The symbolic wedding is fine. Go for it...Kappa's suggestion is fine.

...(some people are fuddy-duddies)
SuzieCII is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 01:58 PM
Join Date: Jan 2003
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I definitely think symbolic weddings are fine and am not sure what people's objections are. I know a lot of people who have a symbolic wedding seperate from the legal one for a variety of reasons - and as unromantic as it is, health insurance issues is a common reason. Not everybody's circumstances are such that they can "fit the mold".

I think Jody's idea is terrific, although I too would suggest not calling this trip a "honeymoon" since you will have the folks along Perhaps you can have the "honeymoon" later when you can focus on each other and not mom and dad.

J_Correa is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 02:10 PM
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A symbolic wedding sounds lovely. You will be celebrating your commitment with the people you love in a beautiful setting. Enjoy!
SeaUrchin is offline  
May 2nd, 2007, 02:40 PM
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At the risk of upsetting, this is something my company does all the time.

In France you have one legal option, the Mayors office. As such every single church wedding in France is a "fake".

We don't call them weddings, they are "celebrations" or "blessings" and I think it's mean-spirited not to recognise the sincerity of the events.

Our clients, septics for the most part, have a quiet civil ceremony back home, then ship friends and family out the Caribbean for a real bang up do!

I am organising one at the moment. The best man is five years old
waring is offline  
May 3rd, 2007, 07:18 AM
Original Poster
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Thank you Kappa- I'm presently working with Italian-weddings.com. You saved the day...
JodyGoBoaty is offline  
May 3rd, 2007, 10:31 AM
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Are the septic clients also sterile?
tomboy is offline  
May 3rd, 2007, 11:01 AM
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I think a marriage can be either religious or civil, and don't think that a real religious wedding would fall into the pretend or fake or "symbolic" category. However, I think a ceremony that is NEITHER legal nor religious is not a wedding in any way.

Whatever people want, it's their money and whatever, really if people want to call it a wedding, fine, but it's not. Most of these celebrations or symbolic things are not any kind of wedding at all. I will take back what I said bout Tom Cruise, because I think his was his real religious ceremony (although I still don't really think of Scientology as a religion, but maybe he does).

Anna Nicole Smith had one of these fake ceremonies also with one of those guys who duked it out for paternity, and I'm sure it meant a lot (ha ha). Oh yeah, that was the manager.

There is a real secular and consumer-driven trend just to have lavish weddings as a form of party and to impress people, and that includes the fake ones, and that's mainly what these are. You don't need any of this showy, pretend stuff to be sincere and to marry someone, if that is really your goal.
Christina is online now  
May 3rd, 2007, 11:47 AM
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Septics as in americans - I assume
wombat7 is offline  
May 3rd, 2007, 12:03 PM
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Aussies and kiwis are the ones that live 'down under'
tomboy is offline  
Jan 6th, 2008, 01:10 AM
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Hi everybody,

I am a wedding planner in Italy so I can say that many foreigners celebrate their unions in this way...It is a celebration of your love and I think it is something very romantic...It is a ceremony just for you...for your love, to renew secretly your promises.I find it absolutly sweet.
best regards

thewhiterose is offline  
Jan 6th, 2008, 01:38 AM
Join Date: Dec 2007
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I guess there are many many gay couples who can't have legal marriages, so they have "commitment ceremonies", so I googled that and found this link to a site that specializes in Italian Commitment Ceremonies, maybe it will help you:

bellastarr is offline  
Jan 6th, 2008, 01:41 AM
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on the site, go to "ceremonies", then follow the link to "Symbolic weddings".
bellastarr is offline  
Jan 6th, 2008, 04:31 AM
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We took our honeymoon before the wedding. We are 2 Americans living in Switzerland and filed all the papers in mid-October and were told that we could expect clearance and approval to get married mid-December. So we set the wedding date right before Christmas, leaving for honeymoon on the 26th. Everything was booked and we waited and waited for the clearance it arrived on the 23rd! Since at that point none of our family had made plans to come over (as we were waiting for official papers, they don't let you book the marriage without it), we just went on the honeymoon, which was lovely and then the wedding took place 10 days later.

And it was all very romantic. And in Italy....
beaupeep is offline  
Jan 6th, 2008, 05:54 AM
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Can somebody give me the latest definition of "troll", please?

I think we have finally run out of legitimate travel questions here.
Zeus is offline  

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