I have to laugh at the naiveté of some of the remarks: "Long before we left, because I enjoy good food, I began to research Venice restaurants...we went to a recommended place near our hotel. Closed. [Monday evening]" looks like not enough research, if you didn't notice that most all restaurants in Venice have a fixed weekly closure. Many fish restaurants do that on Monday since there is no fresh fish markets on Sunday or Monday.
Or "Sure. We arrived at around seven and waited about an hour." - (almost) any restaurant that isn't specifically catering to foreigners and tourists never seats dinner before 7:15, usually after 7:30. Even if you sit at 7:30 the kitchen is just "warming up" and you probably won't get anything that isn't already prepared (chilled antipasti plates, etc.) much before 8:00pm anyway.
Or "You order, say, spaghetti a la Bolognese. When it arrives, you will be hard pressed to find the meat in the meat sauce." well then order pasta alla Bolognese when you are staying in Bologna, and eat something Venetian when in Venice. Sort of like complaining that the New England Clam chowder you order in the restaurant in Cleveland doesn't match up to what you usually eat in Boston.
[refering to typical Venetian bacari serving cichetti] "...But when I went to places suggested in books they were packed full and there was certainly no place to sit." - hard to believe you are complaining that were packed full because the food was good and not too expensive... Sounds like a no brainer to say that you finally found where the people who like good food went...
And the reason there are so many "ripoff" restaurants and tourist traps is not that everything needs to be brought in by boat, but because there are so many tourists that come here and don't bother to look at the back of the menu to notice that a coca cola costs €5 (as it does just about anywhere in Italy in restaurants) and a carafe of perfectly good house wine costs €9.
...and as for the transport, a 7day pass through the discounted Venice Connected site is only €37.50, or about €5.50 a day. Hardly exorbitant for the possibility to hop on and off whenever you want, or to get across the canal to "cut" through Venice.

Instead of looking for desiccated corpses at San Zaccaria, you might have looked at the Bellini over the second or third altar on the left, one of the supreme masterpieces of Venetian art.

And during the day at least, there are several places where a traghetto (public gondola) will take you across the Grand Canal for 0.50 Euro.

Many years ago we visited Venice on a weekend. It was crowded with tourists, we got ripped off in a restaurant and generally found the place confusing and unfriendly.
Got lured back for several days about 15 years ago and found the magic. Loved the atmosphere, the food and the sights. Now we try to put Venice in every trip and grow to love it more each time.
Venice takes a little work but it is one of the delights that lasts forever.

Our best trip to Venice was our 4th and it lasted a week. I pity the day trippers who think they have experienced Venice after spending 6 hours during mid-day. It needs to be savored

Here is our last trip in 2009.

http://www.slowphotos.com/photo/show...y.php?cat=4440

Is 4.5 to 5 euros considered expensive for a glass of wine in a big city restaurant?

I am so sorry Venice disappointed you. We were just there for two weeks and it was NOT ENOUGH. We found it easy to get around, the food was good, (we had one bad meal) and the people very friendly. I understand why the price of goods and services are expensive in Venice. We watched Venice awaken every morning and it requires a lot of manual labor to get it moving.

Venice is one of the most beautiful city in the world! I will go back over and over again.

Topping this because I'll add some comments later.

Some info on restaurants:

http://veneziaristoranti.it/index-en.htm

Single trip tickets on the vaporettos cost 6:50. For that you can ride for an hour in one direction – so you can get from San Marco to Chioggia for 6.50, which is pretty cheap.

You can buy a 2 euro ticket for a traghetto service – i.e. taking a vaporetto from one side of the canal to the other (or use the traditional traghetti, rowed by hand.

Passes make good sense.

The OP comments that residents can ride all day for one euro or thereabouts, and that’s not correct. Holders of an IMOB card can ride for 1.05 for an hour in one direction, instead of 6.50 euro. Anyone can get an IMOB card – it costs 40 euro for non residents, less for residents, and the process of getting a card lasts half an hour. You’ll receive a personalised card with photo ID that you load with “trips” at ten trips for 10.50 euro. It pays for itself in eight or nine trips – and the card has a five year validity, so worth buying if you plan on returning to Venice.

Venice is expensive, and visitors don’t see the costs that locals pay. Garbage collection from an apartment costs 15 euro a week. But tonight we will eat very well at La Bitta for about 70 or 80 euro – say about USD/AUD 100 to 110, and that’s not too crippling. It would cost us AUD 120 in Australia for the same meal.