Venice Banning Fodors

Nov 24th, 2014, 07:37 PM
  #1  
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Venice Banning Fodors

After numerous erroneous reports about wheels and things, anyone who has a Fodor's guide book, been on the Fodor's Travel Boards (including Staten Island and Knots Berry Farm), or knows someone who has been on Fodor's will no longer be admitted to the former Republic.

The test is simple. When entering Venezia, you will be asked about the ban. Anyone who rolls their eyes or has some sanctimonious answer will be refused entry. Any one who has never heard of it, will be gleefully welcomed and be given a 10% discount for some overly ripe glass product.
IMDonehere is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 07:49 PM
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Just to be safe I'm going to tell them I've never heard of the ban even before they ask me.
colduphere is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 08:13 PM
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Ban...what ban???
michele_d is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 08:41 PM
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Fair enough.

I think anyone who wants to visit their fairytale city should be required to swim 100 yards (or meters, if civilized or flanner is reading) in the open sewer they call a canal. Then stand in line to enter a church and eat their crappy food and report on how wonderful the whole experience was. Perhaps the rest of us can then enjoy it.
Fra_Diavolo is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 08:45 PM
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The Venice police enjoy a good joke as much as anyone. Show up at the Grand Canal wearing complete SCUBA gear.
RonZ is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 09:20 PM
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Will they deny entry if you wear Ray Ban sunglasses?
nukesafe is offline  
Nov 24th, 2014, 09:29 PM
  #7  
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If violators are admitted under fraudulent circumstances, they will be punished by being forced to listen to 40 hours of accordion players in San Marco.
IMDonehere is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 02:39 AM
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There is a reciprocal ban in effect: people on Fodor's are not allowed to mention Ven... [Damn! I almost broke the rule.]
Padraig is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 02:57 AM
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It's OK, Padraig, I think you got away with it.
chartley is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 03:38 AM
  #10  
 
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“If you prick us, do we not bleed? if you tickle us, do we not laugh? if you poison us, do we not die? and if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?". - (Act III, scene I).”
― William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice

Revenge ! No fodorite will ever enter Venice till the ban is lifted !!

I'll miss the gelato though.
inquest is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 03:55 AM
  #11  
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There is a huge black market for gelati, but you must act quickly.
IMDonehere is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 04:06 AM
  #12  
 
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Is it true that if you arrive by cruise ship that you might be safe?
Huggy is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 04:34 AM
  #13  
 
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I'm in Venice, and I can verify that the whole thing is a hoax. As proof, I stood in San Marco and shouted the Fodors mantra, "It's all Obama's fault," and no one even noticed.
vincenzo32951 is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 07:00 AM
  #14  
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As far as cruise ships are concerned, they tried those discs they use as rat guards on the tow lines, to stop Fodorites, but they gnawed through them.
IMDonehere is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 07:08 AM
  #15  
 
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Actually, we have learned that if you buy any of that wheeled luggage at the Louis Vuitton store near San Marco it will be allowed but only if you float it along on one of the canals behind you.
Dukey1 is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 08:33 AM
  #16  
 
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I heard they stopped someone wearing Ban deodorant. Of course, it was really old Ban deodorant...
tuscanlifeedit is online now  
Nov 25th, 2014, 09:05 AM
  #17  
 
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lol
BigRuss is offline  
Nov 25th, 2014, 11:30 AM
  #18  
P_M
 
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Bans are bad and banning s/b banned.

When the Venetians tried to ban Viagra it was a big flop.
P_M is online now  
Nov 25th, 2014, 11:39 AM
  #19  
 
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I hear the Serrenissima (sp?) of Venice is now requiring Visas applied for at least one year in advance for venting of possible Fodor links.
PalenQ is online now  
Nov 25th, 2014, 12:09 PM
  #20  
 
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"venting?" I think you mean vetting.
adrienne is offline  

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