another inditement of state schools IMO!

but not sure if, when she said 'start in London' that meant visit London, then...>

Good point - I gathered it were a week after leaving London but if not and if OP has never been to London then I'd just spend some days in London then take the train to Edinburgh and fly out of there - stopping off in York for a few-hours en route to Edinburgh or perhaps an overnight.

Here you go
http://monologues.co.uk/Albert_and_Lion.htm

Flanner is quite right. It should be
"They didn't think much to the ocean
The waves, they was fiddlin' and small
There was no wrecks... nobody drownded
'Fact, nothing to laugh at, at all"

There are lots of monologues at
http://monologues.co.uk/

an' nowt from Leely. Did she get 'it wi' a stick wi' an 'orses 'ead 'andle?