thanks for your reply.

fmpden,
i come here for your expertise and opinions so please dont call me silly.

Ira, the person that wants to hang in AMS isnt a stoner. He sometimes drinks beer.

For the day trip into Germany, we were talking about Dusseldorf.It is 2 hours by train from Amsterdam. If we were to stay in AMS for 7 days we thought it would be fun to take the train to Germany. Most of you say it isnt a great idea.

By overwhelming i meant too much to see in small amount of time. please understand that my DH has rarely left his zipcode. He is afraid he will be running here and there and not really having time to savor the moment.

Plus packing, unpacking, and catching trains. This is daunting to some people.

I am caught in the middle here and want all to be happy.

I am of the mind right now to talk DH into AMS for 3.5 and Paris for 3.5. In the long run I think he will be fine.

7 days in Amsterdam, or 7 days in Paris, or a 3/4 split between the two cities are ALL OK plans.

The "day trip to Germany"... not so much.

I've had so many zipcodes I've lost count, but I share your husband's anxiety about running around too much when traveling.

I don't mind changing hotels at all, but I do hate having my days jammed up with touristing. If you sell your DH on splitting the time, perhaps he'll be content if he can simply lay off the sightseeing.

Is there something your husband really enjoys doing, like a hobby? I think people sometimes forget how interesting it can be to go into a tennis store in Amsterdam, or a woodworking or gardening place in Paris, or visit places similar to the kinds of places one works at home. Just quirky things.

Not sure I would be happy for 7 nights in Amsterdam.

How about 3 nights in Amsterdam and using one day for Dusseldorf and then 4 nights in Paris?

We have been in Paris a few time for 3 nights and seen a lot. It would be better to travel to Paris and have 4 nights so you would have 3 full days.

"He is afraid he will be running here and there and not really having time to savor the moment." - usually we're telling people NOT to rush around so much, so this is a nice change. Any reason why you couldn't do 7 nights in Paris instead of Amsterdam? I've been to both, and I'd really rather spend time in Paris, where there is so much to do, and at least as much atmosphere to savor. Do you have the plane tickets yet, and if so, where are flying to/from?

<<I am caught in the middle here and want all to be happy.>>

And that's the crux of your problem - ain't gonna happen. Split up and do what you each want to do.

I agree with St. Cirq. You posted upthread "I want to make both happy..." - how about making yourself happy? What do YOU want to do? Decide what you would do if you were going on your own, and make that the tie breaker.

If you want time to "savor the moment," then DO IT. There is no tourist police making sure you have seen everything on the approved "list of tourist sights" before you're allowed to leave the city.

Paris is my favorite city in the world and I would be happy to spend 1 day, 10 days, or a year there (or more, if I could swing it). No, you won't see EVERYTHING in 3 days, but even if you had a month, you still wouldn't see "everything."

So give that up as a goal and enjoy whatever time you have. Just pick 1 or 2 sights per day and do that. You will have plenty of time to "savor the moment" if that is what you want to do.