threatening, scary response
 

I think my sense of humor might be sort of dulled today, but i posted yesterday about a hotel in venice and received a creepy response in return. just hoping there's some goodness on this site for newcomers. the hotel, by the way, was the locanda san barnaba.

That's why most posters don't put in their real email- you get nothing but spam and creeps.

I totally disagree. It seems to me that the honest true posters tend to use real email addresses. It's primarily the creeps that use the fake ones. Of course, I know there are a few exceptions, but you won't usually see the most helpful regular posters using fake emails. I have used only my real address for nearly three years, post a lot, and have only received spam once and only received two "creepy" personal emails. Ok, so I suppose I'm setting myself up for some now, but just thought I'd tell it like it is. I think "Creeps" not helpful people hide behind the fake addresses.

I have to completely agree with Patrick's response.

In agreeing with Patrick I did go and look and there's a very odd response from Surlok, which I think, only makes sense if you assume Fodors edited the thread. I don't think Jen intended that she had an email; simply that it was posted here.

Yes, Fodors edited the thread. That's weird, because before, that sort of post, saying nothing but nasty things, were usually posted on another kind of thread, or answering another kind of question. <BR><BR>I haven't seen that before, in my experience on this board, I mean, such a nasty answer to a question merely asking information about a hotel.<BR><BR>Honestly, these posts sounded to me as being written by the same person, that posts and them answer to him/herself, under another alias. The post are similar in style, they lack content, depth, and reasoning, and are simply and merely aggressive. Had I been given the gift of guessing, I would say that these posts' author is an adolescent ( or at least someone quite immature).<BR><BR>There were similar posts on three or more threads last night, but there were different threads, more conceptual than actually asking an objective question about traveling.<BR><BR>Regards,<BR><BR>S<BR><BR>

Ooops.. I meant " that posts and THEN answers to him/herself using another alias.."

I'm afraid that characterisations like<BR>"creepy", "weird", "nasty", etc<BR>are exactly what the creeps want to see.<BR>I wish we could all (including me) have the self-control and fortitude<BR>to absolutely ignore the unpleasant responses, yes, even when they appear in the middle of an informative or helpful thread. Let's just pretend we didn't see or "hear" them, even when they are doing their best to be provocative and persistent.

Agreed, Elaine. That's what I usually do. but in this case, it was apparently the first question posted by the OP on this board. I felt that someone should let her know that the answer she got was not representative of the other Fodorites and their attitude on this forum...<BR><BR>Regards,<BR><BR>S<BR><BR>

I was horrified at some of the responses last night, so many personal attacks, in disguise!It is creepy to write in response to a travel board and to receive such hateful replies,having nothing to do with the topic..and I really do not like the idea that certain people are singled out and called names, as if these "creeps" even knew any of us! I would like to see all of the worthwhile posts (pertaining to travel info-nothing personal or inciting political debate) topped regularly so the creepy stuff can stay at the bottom,where it really belongs.Just MHO ~M

Reading the posts late last night, insomnia being one of my latest symptoms of the times, I felt that some of the posts were being sent by the same person, using different names.Just some kid/bored person, browsing through legitimate threads and derailing them with hateful remarks,name calling,and just general childishness..someone mentioned that these things happen late at night when certain people are bored/alone/cruising for trouble...looks like that is what happened.I guess ignoring them is the best reply-as hard as it is not to try to tell someone to get lost.I just hope people like Jen do not lose out on information that could be helpful, being turned off by the many nasty responses a normal question can elicit.

May I enter this thread and ask what was your question and what kind of spooky response did Jen get. I have been out of the loop for a bit and trying to get back in. I know that people have been horrible on this forum. I think that the US one is worse. I moved over to Frommers.

It was a simple and direct question about Locanda San Barnaba in Venice..<BR><BR>And there was another post, " A belated thank you" that was trashed as well. Fodors already edited the thread.<BR><BR>Regards,<BR><BR>S

I agree with you completely Mia, I think that adding to the comments as you do, Surlok, only makes thinks worse. You can't reason with this sort of poster. Striking back is what they want. Ignoring someone is one of the best thing you can to in retaliation

Pardon me, Mimi, could you elaborate..?? To what comments are you referring ??<BR><BR>S

If it gets weird, just drop it. Go on. There are so many interesting threads. Don't waste your time.<BR>

Ana,<BR><BR>FYI, I'm pasting my answer above:<BR><BR>"Agreed, Elaine. That's what I usually do ( ignoring). but in this case, it was<BR>apparently the first question posted by the OP (Jennifer) on this board. I felt that someone should let her know that the answer she got was not representative of the other Fodorites and their attitude on this forum..."<BR><BR>Regards,<BR><BR>S<BR><BR>

Anyone who leaves an actual email address on a message board will probably leave their cars unlocked in NYC with a wallet on the front seat.<BR><BR>It's not about "trust" or "honesty"; it's about asking for trouble.

I realize "notme" that your post was meant to insult and get us riled up, but I won't stoop to your level. I would never leave my wallet on a seat in a car or leave my car unlocked in New York and I totally fail to understand what such a comparison has to do with a person being honest and himself on the internet, which I am. As a result of my being honest I have made many friends from Fodor's not only on the internet, but having met them across the country.

when you and your friends were having a conversation about food and the nasties turned it around.

I have learned to let the obvious insulting posts roll of my back - they remind me of someone who doesn't know how to swim and is drowning. The best thing you can do is keep your distance. While words are powerful tools / weapons - it might be helpful to remember that we are all fairly safe from really being attacked being that were all sitting in front of our computers. Didn't we all suffer worse in high school? <BR><BR>I don't feel comfortable icluding my email - but have no problem using my name. This does personalize my post which does allow for someone to single me out. The person going by the name "notme" is in someways unattached to his / her post and thus singling "notme" out is not as upsetting to that person because of the anonyminity. It's cowardly and spineless. <BR><BR>Keep posts relevant and don't sweat the small stuff. While I believe in being sensitive I have little patience for hypersensitivity which to me is nothing but an attempt for attention and control.

meant to "roll off my back"

That was an exception, Mimi ( if you're referring to that " Portugal and ...). Since I had written in Portuguese, and there are newcomers here that could have read the last part of the thread only ( it was quite a long thread that one, more than 100 posts), and ignore Claireobscur's words, advising the readers to use Babelfish to translate the Portuguese sentences into English, I though that a sort of explanation was necessary.<BR><BR>Regards,<BR><BR>S

Hi, Not Me. Call me naive. I've lost wallets, and always get them back WITH THE CASH. I just had my cel phone returned by someone in the Virgin Islands who had found it in a cab in the States. And once, I even accidentally left my keys in the car door over night in Manhattan. Car was there in the morning. Surlok, thanks for replying, Patrick and Joanne, you're my kind of people (not scatterbrained--nice!)<BR>Jen

I stopped posting with my real email several years ago after receiving totally weird and harassing emails. But, I assure you I've never sent anyone anything that could be called "creepy" so I totally disagree with Patrick. It's his decision what to do, but he shouldn't criticize others for deciding differently.

Patrick, till 2 months ago I never posted anonymously, and till then I totally agree with you. Like i said elsewhere, Jen wasn't talking about email responses anyway, but what was said here and got edited out.<BR><BR>And Mark, as a bit of an oldie, to a relative newbie, as I've been reading your posts you are right on the money. Keep up the good work and help drag this place back to where it used to be

Mark, I really like you analogy to swimming near someone who's drowning. That's right on the money. <BR><BR>I understand it is hard to develop a thick skin but no one should let themselves be personally wounded by what some complete stranger says about them on this (or any other) internet forum. When I used to work in retail we would occasionally have a customer come in the store and lambast one of the employees for no reason. We just said to each other, "that person had a problem before they came in here, they just vented it on us" and that is usually the case here. <BR><BR>And, I always post using the same name, don't need to hide behind anonymity, but also don't want to give out my private email. I get enough junk as it is.

I always use the same name and nonreal email address. I used to use a real email address and I got an enormous amount of spam; when I stopped, it stopped.

Kam, please reread my post. I was not aware that I was criticizing anyone for not using their real email address. The thread was about "creeps", and I suggested that "creeps" were more likely to hide behind fake email addresses than helpful posters were. I don't call that criticizing anyone except people who make "creepy" remarks, and I do not apologize if I offended them. I certainly did not mean to imply that anyone who uses a fake email address is a "creep" or only makes rude or nasty posts. I did not mean to suggest that if a person is uncomfortable using his real address, that he should do so and was certainly not criticizing anyone for using a fake email, just explaining that I use a real one and have had no problems, but that I seldom see a "nasty" or "creepy" poster using a real email address. Sorry if I offended you; it was certainly not intended.

Thanks xxxx<BR><BR>I've been coming to this forum for 2 years and - as we are all aware - the tone has defintely changed lately. And that concerns me. I enjoy reading people's questions and answers - novice to expert, and even sometimes the fashion threads - kinda like eating potato chips. If someone wants to call me stupid then explain why - who knows, you might be right. I don't think anyone here has a problem with discourse. A majority of the posters here strike me as kind, friendly, generous, reasonable individuals. And I think we are the majority. Who's forum? OUR forum. <BR><BR><BR>

These are my real name and email address. I have never had any inapropriate emails ( I realise that this may be asking for trouble but I have a thick skin).<BR><BR>I have had some enquiries from people asking for more detail on something I've contributed, which is always welcome. Other than that no problems.<BR><BR>