NewbE

I do think that flights and hotels are the least of it--maybe that's just my opinion. The "what do we do each day" and "how do we do it" and "how do we get there" and "where do we eat" stuff is the nitnoid stuff that can get you down. It can be easy, if you're good at planning and your travel companion is amenable, or it can be annoyingly hard.

elberko

Yup, the dozens of decisions that need to be made each day are what will make a DYI trip challenging unless you get along REALLY well.

4sammy

Wow - so many responses - I hope you read all of them! I didn't so I may repeat others, sorry.

I think being in a fodors forum, you're going to find that most of us enjoy the planning of the trip as much as the actual trip itself. So most of us are going to be biased against tours.

Personally, even on day tours - I feel very claustrophobic. If you're on your own, you can decide if something is not that interesting, if you'd rather spend more time there, or less, whatever. I just can't stand being trapped and that is how I have felt on even one-day excursions - so I consciously avoid them at all costs .

I did travel to Italy as a first-timer to Europe, alone, as a college senior. I did a Dream Vacations trip through Delta - an "unescorted" trip that provided flights, hotels, and train tickets between the cities. Rome, Florence, Venice, Milan . It was a great way for me, a 20 year old single woman, to have a little structure, but now I'm in my 40s and those hotels would not be OK with me at all. I am a hotel snob now too

If you aren't that picky about accomodations and don't really enjoy planning - the unescorted tour is fine. I can't think of anything on that trip that was planned for us besides the logistics . In each city, I was able to go to local guides and find day trips and scheduled tours of the Vatican / Doges Palace / Uffizi on my own with zero problems... and that was 25 years ago before there was Internet to research and plan anything in advance.

thursdaysd

"when looking at a tour total, divide by the number of days"

Nights, not days. Tours count the departure day, when all you do is eat breakfast. And be careful, some, especially if they include airfare, include the day you leave the US, when you spend the night on the plane.

Have you considered going solo?

AJPeabody

Consider: If you do the planning, any problem is yours. On a tour: It's theirs, and problems are less likely.

Consider: On your own: Pro: Do what you want, when you want, for as long or short amount of time you want. Con: What do you want to do, Spin? I don't know, what do want to do, Marty? [Yeah, I'm that old.] How do I get there? Which line? What's the "don't miss" vs. "skip it" parts of every museum? Which museum today? Which church? Which walk? Of course, there are audio guides and guidebooks. (Use the audio, otherwise you are reading rather than seeing.)

Consider: Tours feed you in places that can serve 24-40 meals at once, and the food will be blanded down versions of local dishes, cheaply made. On your own: You will have to find your own places to eat, but you get what you want, authentic.

Consider: Tours use busses, travelers use trains. The second is a lot faster and more pleasant.

Consider: Bargain tours charge extra for the "optional" daytrips that go to the things you went to the place to see in the first place.

My recommendation: Tour option: Find one that uses centrally located hotels, don't feed you more than breakfast and an occasional blowout feast, and avoids shopping breaks. On your own: Let your friend find the hotels so only you can complain if necessary, and both of you read and absorb guidebooks so you know what you want to see (and miss) each place. Use local half day tours for sites such as the Colosseum and the Vatican. Take a guided walking tour.

And remember: You can go back next year to do it right the second time.

Whathello

Is the high end friend single ?

Tours are a great way to meet people who have roughly the same tastes (is it a cultural tour, a food ventured one etc ...).
Should my wife realise she is wasting her time with me I'd go on the tour NewbE talked about. Only women above 50 : my dream.

Socialising is a key in tours imo.
That and be able to not plan anything and drink every day and night knowing you won't have to drive and you can sleep it off on the bus.

Ah OP is a woman ... having sex, sleep and be plastered may not be what she is after

;-)

bankbabe

Oh my goodnesss! So many responses. Thanks again! I have not had a response yet from my friend after an e-mail sent 24 hours ago. Perhaps she is changing her mind...? I will call her to find out. And yes, I certainly have considered going solo. DH wouldn't be too happy about that and he just might end up coming with me after all. In that case, forget the darn tour, I can plan this myself.

But in the event I go by myself, a tour might be the best. I hate being all alone, and would enjoy meeting others. It will have to be a higher end one for this hotel snob.

NewbE

<Consider: Tours feed you in places that can serve 24-40 meals at once, and the food will be blanded down versions of local dishes, cheaply made. >

Again, simply too large a generalization to be true.

If you are on a cheap tour with 39 other people, sure. If you're on a higher end tour with only 9 other people, not true.

<Tours use busses, travelers use trains. The second is a lot faster and more pleasant.>

Maybe. The friend of mine who went on Whathello's dream trip liked seeing the countryside from the bus. Their longest ride was about 4 hours at one stretch.

kybourbon

You don't have to be alone if you go by yourself. If you book any day tours you will be hanging out with people then. You often come across other singles at hotels and can end up going out to dinner with them. Dinner is about the only time I mind being alone while traveling, but often someone at a surrounding table ends up chatting with you.

Here's a list of dozens of trip reports by solo travelers on Fodor's.

http://www.fodors.com/community/trav...collection.cfm

thursdaysd

Not being a hotel snob makes it a lot easier to meet people. I'm not talking hostels - I need a bedroom to myself - but B&Bs, guesthouses and pensions are so much friendlier than hotels. However, walking tours can provide company, and I have sometimes had married couples strike up conversations with me at dinner - even when I'm wearing earbuds!

socaltraveler

Our small group tours allow my DH to tell new people his old stories, don't laugh, it gives me a breather. And with small groups, we always eat in really nice places, plus we usually have a few meals, lunch or dinner, to do on our own. Small groups, small buses, I do not miss the train, and the routes take us exactly where we need to be be. We mix up our travels with independent and small groups.

Hobbert

I've been on 4 "tours" (1 was just flights + hotel, 2 were traditional tour groups, and 1 was a safari). I'm heading out on another in October with my mom to Ireland. Yeah, Ireland is pretty easy to plan but the tour gives my mom somebody to chat with other than me, a guide to annoy with her questions about how her phone works and what time we leave in the morning, and lets me just enjoy hanging out with her without being in charge of the details. Italy's pretty easy to navigate and nothing will be terribly "foreign" to your friend; well, at least it shouldn't be. There are tours to fit nearly every experience and they shouldn't be sniffed at just because they're tours. Yeah, some probably are forced marches but they ones I've been on were fun adventures with people who like to travel and had lots of downtime. You can definitely plan Italy on your own but just consider the details of traveling with (and spending lots of time with) your friend. Hope this helps!

Gwendolynn

bankbabe... take that Tauck tour mentioned above!! Every place you want to go and they stay in Baglioni hotels. If that doesn't satisfy your high maintenance friend I don't know what will. -

vipsha

Florence, Rome, and Venice all in the same trip can be intense. I've been doing some small group tours lately, mainly because of time constraints and out of consideration for the shorter attention spans of some family members. Despite the convenience of it all I feel rushed. Each time I take a tour I miss the time when I walked around Venice guidebook in hand, lingering as long as I liked in front of a painting. Finding a good tour takes some research, I tend to like private tours by local residents who are knowledgeable about the place.
The word hotel snob can mean different things to different people. Over the years my preferences have moved away from predictable 4* or 5* hotels with a view of the biggest attraction from the room window. I now try to pick a hotel that is individually owned, conveniently located, and clean and comfortable with some character. I consider myself a hotel snob now, when I was younger I was less discriminating and possibly lazy.

dreamon

I would spend longer choosing the right tour than booking a few hotels and trains. If I choose the wrong tour - rubbish holiday. If I choose one wrong hotel - not really much of an issue.

If you decide on a tour be very clear about your priorities and what's important to you. There are so many tours on offer and they're all different. And more than anything, your experience is likely to be influenced by your fellow travellers, which you can't predict.

Sassafrass

Great advice, Dreamon. Sometimes people choose a tour so they do not have to do any planning or research, but as you pointed out, researching the tour is even more important because it affects the entire experience.

massimop

If you are traveling between major cities, Trenitalia will pick up your luggage at one hotel and transport to your next hotel for you.

Have all the travel consultants for Italy gone out of business?

There was a time, a few years ago, when there were no end of people you could find on the internet who would give you customised boutique concierge service helping plan an itinerary to Italy based on your interests and preferences. They would book all the hotels for you, likewise restaurants & museums, arrange for all the transportation, including car service pickups. Then these services would send you a little booklet that told you where to go every day.

They actually weren't very expensive if you compared them to the costs of high-end tours. They charge for their time, and you pay for that -- no mark-ups on the costs you would pay for hotels if you booked them yourself, etc.

Services like this

http://www.idyllicitaly.com

massimop

PS: I realise you said you like to plan but the travel services I am referring to you listen to what you have to say, give you options, accept your changes and book the things you choose, even if it's something you decide to insert from your own research. But they handle to the tedium of booking car services & making restaurant reservations, cha cha

thursdaysd

Well, some of us travel quite happily without car services or restaurant reservations made much more than a day in advance!

If someone wants to pay for concierge services, some credit cards offer them - I think my Citibank AA affinity Platinum cards does, although I never use them - or you could check Wendy Perrin's site for one of her recommendations. But it will be expensive.

Come to think of it, Rick Steves offers travel planning help, which would undoubtedly be cheaper than one of Perrin's agents.

https://www.ricksteves.com/travel-he...rt-consultants

Didn't know Trenitalia would handle the luggage - thanks for the info. Haven't needed the service in the past as I travel light, but am having health issues which might make it very useful.

mlgb

My friends like Gate1. Seem to be a variety of options.