DueDili

As readers of this Forum will know, i am considering buying in the Dordogne. That topic has been exhausted, but fruitful it was nevertheless.

It is quite interesting looking at the various accounts of living in the Dordogne though. I have to say that the majority, but by no means all, are tales of hardship and penury. Some people, but again, by no means all, actually come accross as quite bitter about the experience and i am wondering why? They were brave, i think, to have made the move and it is a beautfiul region and yet they seem disatisfied. Is this, one wonders, because they have burnt a bridge in that repatriating to the UK would not be possible financially or is it more to do with glass half empty mentality.

I would welcome views on this and stories. To give it a little context, i am truly intrigued - perhaps even jealous - of folk that have checked out and yet some of the discussions around this have slightly disabused me of this notion. I suppose key to the idea is accepting that life goes on but with less money. The less money thing though requires quite a bit of training and conditioning wouldn't you say? I suppose one has to concentrate on the true priorities in life rather than the need for an extra shot of whatever in the cofficino.

I am not too au fait with the rural French, but one message that comes accross loud and clear is that they are friendly and kind, at least in the Dordogne. I wonder why they appear more content than some of the English people around them in the region.

kerouac

I think that homesickness plays a big part. France and England are very close together geographically, but in certain ways they are light years apart. Something as simple as stopping for a cup of tea can seem totally alien to the French. Culture shock is always more extreme in rural areas.

Carlux

OK, I will jump in here. We moved to the Dordogne 16 years ago from Canada. I was actually born in England, but my parents moved when I was 3. My husband's father was born in England. Thus we both have British passports, which made it easier.

We left corporate jobs which no longer satisfied us, and, having fallen in love with this region, gave up house, jobs, family, etc. to live here. We had to work hard, but were so thrilled to be where we wanted to be that it was worth it.

Once we arrived we made a conscious effort to participate in French life here. We met many 'Brits' who didn't feel the same, and our impression of most was that they didn't have the same joie de vivre as our French friends. They often seemed to be complaining about experiences which we never seemed to have.

Part of the reason we were able to 'integrate' is that we really worked on improving our French before we came. People assume that, being Canadian, we spoke French. Well, we had high school French, a long time ago, but we knew that we would need more to come here. So, while we were trying to sell our house and save some money, we took night classes, did our homework, struggled through snow storms to get to the language lab, got off the plane from business trips to attend 3 hour French grammar class. I'm amazed at the number of people who dream of coming here but don't make any preparation - they think they will 'pick up' the language. But if you can't talk to your neighbours, you aren't going to have much chance to improve the language.

Another difference between us and many of the British in the area is that it is not so easy for us to go back to Canada. We do, because we have family there, but certainly not every few months - not even every year. We feel that many people here have not really cut the ties. They have SKY television, they read British newspapers, they look for other British people to associate with.

In fact, while there are English language newspapers and web sites for 'ex-pats' we don't see ourselves that way. To me an ex-pat is someone who is temporarily in another country. We made the decision to immigrate to France, just as my parents made the decision to immigrate to Canada. (A bit strange all this going back and forth across the pond, but that's life)This is now our home

Our French friends are welcoming, kind, and fun-loving. They are often mystified, and sometimes rather hurt that people who come to live in their area don't want to associate with them.

StCirq

The British in the Dordogne often seem to have forgotten that Montgomery lost the Battle of Castillon. There is a subtle but constant friction between them and the French, and there has been since Eleanor of Aquitaine was roaming around. It's palpable, and the British keep it very much alive by refusing to accept the local rural culture in large part, preferring often to set up tea shops and organize cricket clubs and choirs to sing Anglican hymns. The very fact that so many of them can reside there for decades without ever bothering to learn the language grates on the rural French (me too).

I'm not sure what you're getting at with regard to money. Of course if you're footing the bill for two residences, you'll have less extra cash. If you totally check out and just move to France, that isn't an issue, I suppose. As for who's more content, the rural "natives" or the British expats, I'm sure the animosity of the rural French toward the Brits plays a part. When I bought my house in the Dordogne, my neighbors pretty much all said the same thing - thank goodness it's an American and not another Brit. The friction goes back centuries.

ira

Hi DD,

>I wonder why they appear more content than some of the English people around them in the region. <

Because they have managed to sell run down old farm houses for about 6X what they were worth to the foreigners.

Dukey

From soneone who has lived in more than one other so-called "foreign" country...I honestly think it helps if

you really WANT to LIVE there and all that entails; IOW not just have a house there and you happen to be living in it

yes we all KNOW that there are certain things/aspects of life that are "better back home" and some of those you'll discover after you arrive and some you should have easily figured out BEFORE you decided to move...and if you chose not to take those into account before making the final decision then shame on you.

OK, so they are better..but that was then and this is now. Whining about it or hoping fo it makes me wonder why you moved.

And I have found there are a LOT of people and from a LOT of different countries who move somewhere "foreign" either temporarily or permanently who tend to congregate "with our own kind" and sometimes I think unfamiliarity with the "foreign" language fosters that sort of activity.

When I was still on Active Duty and posted abroad I knew more than a few folks who didn't want to leave the post or explore the region, etc., for a variety of reasons; and sometimes there are foreign diplomatic families I know here in the DC area who tend to do some of the same stuff.

I hope it all works out for you and that you can also come to overlook what some obviously feel are major flaws in your neighbors and not allow those to affect your own life or experiences.

Christina

I just wonder why so many British think they should be buying up southern France. I'd probably resent it a lot if a bunch of wealthy people started buying up property around me to a noticeable extent, if they were all from one particular foreign country.

I was in Marseille France in July and having a nice dinner minding my own business (reading the local paper) at an outdoor cafe. Some older British guy who owned a house around there, and a boat, and golfed, and also flew to Florida a lot, etc (he bent my ear off) was sitting next to me, alone, and really wouldn't leave me alone when I was politely trying to get him to shut up. I think he figured out I spoke English, although he didn't know where I was from and I was speaking to the staff in French. In any case, this guy was obviously wealthy and had owned a second house outside Marseille somewhere for 20 years or more, plus a boat, etc. And yet he had never bothered to learn hardly any French, for one thing. And he complained a lot about how they were doing things there, then he had to throw in about how what BP had done to the gulf in the US was trivial and not their fault, etc.

So I wouldn't want a bunch of folks like that around in my neighborhood, either.

kerouac

I have read that one of the main reasons that the British buy places in France is because they cost half as much as in England. This is not a good enough reason, but it pushes some of them across the Channel.